Weekly Flylady Thread 29th September 2008

toottifrootti

The Why's of Men?

1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?

(Because they are plugged into a genius)

2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?

(They don't have enough time)

3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?
(They don't stop to ask directions)

4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
(Because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock)
(You're laughing, aren't you?!?!)

5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
(So they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties)

6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
(You need a rough draft before you make a final copy)

7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?

(Dont know.....it never happened)

(Cmon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)

And the personal favorite:

8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
(Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn)

One for the ladies

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'

'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'

He yelled back, 'University of Oklahoma.'

And they say blondes are dumb...

A couple is lying in bed. The man says,

'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.'

The woman replies, 'I'll miss you...'

'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'

'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?

A: A rumor

Dear Lord,

I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death.

AMEN

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual.'

Flylady_Flower

Christmasshopper wrote: »

Ah the penny drops.
Count me in :T

Glad you made it Christmasshopper... how did you do? EDIT: Oooh, just seen, well done you!

I did:
Minging Monday - Kitchen and Dining Room
Level One
[strike]Clear and wipe kitchen surfaces[/strike]
Level Two
[strike]Clean the oven & hob[/strike] Did the hob and wiped the bottom of the oven and grill above as self clean...
[strike]Wipe dining table... (Clean table cloth if necessary) [/strike]
Level Three
[strike]Dust any extra furniture in dining area, checking for cobwebs on way round
Wipe and replace all those small appliances... kettle, toaster etc ..
Choose one small appliance to clean thoroughly... [/strike]Did the microwave - didn't look like i'd ever done underneath! :eek:
[strike]Clean door fronts and insides & fronts of appliances... don't forget those kick boards...
Defrost the freezer... clean it out and make use of those things which need using![/strike] did about a month ago so OK at the moment and have a list of all that is in to use up!
Extra Mission: help yourself
[strike]Clean the fridge... [/strike] wiped out the bottom and the milk tray - how does that get so dirty?

Also emptied WM, put TD on and hung up rest of washing on airer

Still to do:
Sweep and mop floors
Wipe down any tiles and shine those taps... a toothbrush is great for cleaning away the gunk!

I'm going to have a mini HHC (about 20 mins) to finish above so I can sit and watch H&A on Fiver - (might even start on the lounge while I watch - I seem to have some energy at the moment!) Anyone want to join me, feel free...!

Christmasshopper

I haven't stopped yet I'm on a roll.

kazwookie

Ok dinner eaten
Cats fed twice!
WM on
Beds stripped
Rubbish out of house and into wheelie bin

Can of cider opened................

mOZzy_2

ds has just come out of the bath, dd is about to - then milk and soon bed for them

didn't manage much today
dinner turned out nice though and not much work with just chucking everything in the sc :j
i did vacuum upstairs and put the bin out and the plastic recycling and the paper recycling. and on washing folded ready to go upstairs.
playroom is still tidy and i am ready for bed



well done xmasshopper on your first day!! :T

denisenz which part of nz are you in?

rach

:beer: It's the weekend - YAY

I am officially shattered! But glad to be home. Dinner's in the oven (extra batch of lasagne frozen the other week), I've taken my bra off (hehe, my nightly ritual), and DH put the heating on when I was away last night so the flat is warm (Also means we've got loads of hot water so may put a load of washing in and have a bath).

Still need to catch up with the thread since wed night :rolleyes: may take some time....but I look forward to it (probably tomorrow morning when DH is studying, we're off to a wedding in the afternoon)

boddy

Living room rearranged. Moved tv and swopped bits of furniture around.
Hoovered through.
Recycling out.
Washing put on clothes horse
Clean washing put upstairs.
cat fed.
Swept kitchen floor.
Collapsed in chair with a cuppa.

Christmasshopper

I'm loving this. So far I have found my favourite lipstick that has been missing for aaages and an Easter card from my mum with a £20 note inside it.
(I did tell you I had been hiding paperwork for a long time.):rolleyes:

mOZzy_2

yeahhh i did it!!!
the kitchen is clean and tidy and the sink is eeeeeeeempty :j :T




i am off to watch some tv with OH ... catch you all laters

Mudbath

SarahShattered wrote: »

Hi Mudders I'm going to have friends over, nothing spectacular, just a chilled, relaxed evening. I figured if I start talking about 'a party' I'll get all stressed out, and not enjoy myself. So this way, I'm just having mates over, no pressure, we'll probably scoff some nice chilli, and drink some lovely wine.

??

That sounds like what i'm going to do. I don't want the hassle of anything 'organised'! xx