The Compers Inn - Part 6

ThinkingOfLinking

Easter, I'm so sorry for what you and your daughter are going through. Kids are so innocent; it is entirely the parents to blame for that behaviour. I was severely bullied myself throughout school, and the teachers did nothing. I wish I'd had a parent to stick up for me as much as you seem to be for your daughter. And Toniq, I agree, it is criminal damage, and even at this stafe, Easter, I think you should approach the police asking to take action against the parents for criminal damage. Kids don't do this sort of thing, and use that sort of language without "nurturing" from their parents. Kids are actually very open-minded and accepting if you let them be.

It's just so unfair the bullies can get on with it all, whereas the victims of the bullying get their education interrupted, when they're more likely to want to succeed than the bullies anyway.

toomanykids

Jeeze easter, bullying is sooooo difficult and heartbreaking. DS2 has had a helluva lot of this in his time (he's now 2nd year at high school) and I have'nt found the solution to it for him either. I was bullied incessantly by one girl at primary school and always thought my mum did nothing about it. Found out years later that she tried everything to stop it but kept it quiet from me as she was always a "don't make a fuss or a big deal" type of person. I took the opposite approach to Mark's problems and he's told me he wishes I hadn't been so vocal at times. I joined the school board, became chair and went to seminars, talks, read everthing on the web, tried everything the ed. authorities laid on re bullying and I came to the conclusion that there is no one solution, each case is different and no two problems can be solved in exactly the same way. What works for one probably won't for another.

You've tried with the girl's parents and going to the police will take matters down a road you might not want to go (I've been there too!!). Maybe speaking to them will be enough but maybe you could threaten them with the police as toniq and FE said if things don't improve. Keep a diary of incidents(but try not to become too focused on it or it'll take over your life and every wee thing will be added and become a massive event) and tell the person in charge of bullying/your daughter's welfare at school you want a weekly appointment arrangement made until things are resolved. Meanwhile try to keep some sort of dialogue going with your neighbours, easier to talk than shout sometimes?!

But the most important thing is to ask your daughter what she wants to do from day to day/incident to incident and listen to her. If she wants to take the occasional day off then let her, sometimes a break from it does everyone some good.

Tell me to shut up if you like but that's kinda what I've gleaned from my horrible experiences with it. Not everyone will agree with me I know but everyone's different and bullies aren't necessarily cowards, sometimes they bully just because they can!

easter65

No TMK I think your 100% correct and so are Toniq and FE...And I agree about the occasional day off if its a problem at school thats not being solved..After all she is in the care of the school and if they cannot protect her then she wont be there..He still hasn't rang me and I phoned at 9 and he is head of year and was teaching 1 lesson they said..My kids are in good standing with the school as you know my eldest did 6th form there got his A Levels and graduated uni last week so we're not a family who dont care..But if he doesn't phone me I shall keep her home tomorrow and not phone them..Then they will ring me asking about her absence and I'll tell him this is why she is home..

toomanykids

That should get the message home to them easter, good plan. I hope you're DD is ok, really mean that, nothing worse than seeing hurt in your child's eyes. Will be thinking of you all xxxx

Miss_Cinnabon

I think you are right in keeping her off a day or so if the school just arent bothered about the bullying, you have to keep a close eye on your child and its your childs welfare that comes first above everything, i know of two kids that were bullied, one even by the teachers, he is now being home schooled, the other one sadly died on her 13th birthday, due to suffocation caused by a hypo attack, but who knows if the bullying had a knock on effect to her?

Bella - loved the pics and your hair is stunning, love the colour

im having a boring day today, cant be bothered doing anything lol

ThinkingOfLinking

Toniq, my PMs are playing up but I see you sent the message to me last night; I was in bed. Since then, some merges have already been made. Duly noted.

easter65

Thanks both..Princess that's awful..We never know how things affect our children deep down and name calling is so horrible because it's like a chain reaction with the kids in class..She puts a little make-up on for school, You know just some eyeshadow but keeps saying look mom it looks uneven because of my eye..She is so much more aware of it now due to the name calling...Anyway on a great note...Postlady saw me this morning by school and said i have a parcel on the van..Think it may be the Wall-E Backpack I won 3 weeks ago but will have to wait...:D

ThinkingOfLinking

Easter, I had a large mole on my face, glasses and braces and was not allowed to grow my hair or wear trendy clothes; I did not get jeans, trainers or my ears pierced til I turned 13 and was not allowed to grow my hair til I was 16. I had it bad. I know what it can be like when you don't look like everyone else. I even got picked on because of my packed lunch; I had juice instead of coke, fruit and nuts intead of chocolate, and my cheese was real, not plastic, and they hated me for it. I became more quiet and just sat alone with my books and then it carried on and got worse as I was then accused of being a snob and thinking I was too good for them. SO glad to be out of there now. Hope it isthe Wall E backpack you got today; your girl would love to come home to that, especially if she does not know about it yet.

ginjim

i hope its not the walle pack and something else instead:D:D

Muffy0

Anyone else having an amzing month for wins? I've had a win everyday since the beginning of September - some days two! I'm totally shocked because most of them have been significant wins!