CSA advice needed

samarnesen

sorry rant over now lol
havent had a good rant for ages

child359

samarnesen wrote: »

tell me about it
i got money off him for a year before he decided to go self employed in april 2007 since then ive been getting £5.25 a week because he doesnt have to hand his accounts in until jan 09 so they cant make a proper assessment until then
hes driving around in a top of the range jeep and is planning a jan holiday to south africa
my son stopped seeing his dad about 6 months ago hes 13 now and basically lost interest but his dad didnt bother chasing it up either but while he was seeing him they used to spend about £8 a week on dog food and toys for the dog so they were spending more on the dog than on my son which is one of things that my son was put off about him

I am really sorry. That's sounds awful especially for your son too
The more I hear about this the more I wonder about the people that set the parameters for the CSA :rolleyes:

child359

samarnesen wrote: »

sorry rant over now lol
havent had a good rant for ages

That was NO rant believe me!!!:D

samarnesen

to be honest my son is really that fussed he said his dad was too miserable anyway and he prefered to stay at home and have fun with me instead lol:j :T

annie_d

I just wonderd, as the mother of 3 (now adult) children, does your son have access to the internet too? Could you find him a site he can moan/ complain/ let odd steam/ laugh/ share with other people in the same situation as him?

I remember when i was goiing through it all getting a lot of support from people online, you know, close but not too close?

One of my daughters said to me today that she had found a forum where she could talk to other people all those years ago who still loved their dad but didn't see him and disliked his behaviour and could just ventonline.

Just a thought xx

annie_d

I just wonderd, as the mother of 3 (now adult) children, does your son have access to the internet too? Could you find him a site he can moan/ complain/ let off steam/ laugh/ share with other people in the same situation as him?

I remember when i was goiing through it all getting a lot of support from people online, you know, close but not too close?

One of my daughters said to me today that she had found a forum where she could talk to other people all those years ago who still loved their dad but didn't see him and disliked his behaviour and could just vent online.

Just a thought xx

annie_d

ooops sorry, i was trying to alter the word "odd" for "off"

Loopy_Girl

samarnesen wrote: »

tell me about it
i got money off him for a year before he decided to go self employed in april 2007 since then ive been getting £5.25 a week because he doesnt have to hand his accounts in until jan 09 so they cant make a proper assessment until then
hes driving around in a top of the range jeep and is planning a jan holiday to south africa
my son stopped seeing his dad about 6 months ago hes 13 now and basically lost interest but his dad didnt bother chasing it up either but while he was seeing him they used to spend about £8 a week on dog food and toys for the dog so they were spending more on the dog than on my son which is one of things that my son was put off about him

I kept quiet for the whole of last year with CSA (on purpose) and then asked for a reassessment just as the accounts went in...clearly ex wasn't expecting that as his accounts showed he could afford to pay me £70.00 per week!!!!

Fast forward a few months and he is now apparantly living on £150.00 a week. Him, his missus and 2 kids...okies then!!! So now I am getting jack...alhough there is a LO going through for the arrears and I suppose when (if) I get the money from that I am just going to have to phone every so often and ask for a reassessment.

samarnesen

you hear all these stories about them taking far too much money off absent parents living them in debt and even killing themselves and i know that happens but for me its always been about the absent parent he has always done a lot better out of it than i ever had.
i thought there was supposed to be a set formula they use to assess people but theyve so clearly got it wrong some people are paying far too much and others aren't paying enough