Advice please :(

Sarah1971

My husband left me just over a year ago when my 2nd son was just born. 12 months on and we are divorced, he remarried and he pays the bare minimum (£200 a month) for the childrens upkeep! He lost his job, declared himself bankrupt to take the easy way out paying off his debts, story of his life - burying his head in the sand.

In the meantime I returned to work full time and took on a £152k mortgage and some credit cards. At the time I thought I could manage but as time has gone on, and believe me it's been tough, I have realised I am seriously financially over committed on just one salary and I am needing some advice what to do next.

I am considering writing to/contacting the credit card companies to let them know I can no longer meet the payments. I am worried though that I will have all sorts of problems - I expect CCJs but I am worried about bailiffs and the like. My thinking is as long as I pay my mortgage as I have been doing I should be ok, obviously the CCJs will be paid too in smaller amounts, but they can't take what I haven't got! Also because of his bankruptcy this seems to have affected my credit rating even though we have no financial links so I cannot switch onto 0% cards anymore.

Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated before I take any action.

Thanks in advance for your time and help
Sarah

cheekymole

Sarah,
Really sorry to hear your predicament. The best thing, in my opinion is honesty. Offer to pay waht you can afford each month rather than pay nothing at all.
CAB are very helpful in these kind of situations and are far better qualified to give advice than I am.
Good luck, girl, show him that you CAN do it without him

jobbingmusician

Sarah, from what I have read on this board, you'd get lots of good advice from helpful MSEers if this post was on the 'Debt-Free Wannabee' board.

Have a look at that board, and if you agree with me, perhaps you could ask one of the moderators to move it there???

(Just a suggestion to help you get as many replies as poss!)

nearlyrich

I agree with eastchristina, Debt free wannabe is an excellent place to get some good advice. I can't move the post from here but if you want it moving PM one of the board guides who are
Glad, and mini

kiwichick

Hi Sarah,

As a previous poster has suggested,I wouldreally urgeyou tocontact Citizens Advice. They deal with people in this sort of situation more often than you think. It is there job to make sure they are giving you the best advice, you will want to be sure before commiting yourself, especially as you have your children to think about.

Are you family aware of the situation? Are you able to talk to them? Even if they cant provide you with short term financial help, your folks/siblings etc may make good sounding boards for you. It always feels better to talk things through with another adult, they can help to feel better about what you are trying to do.

Try asking the council about help with council tax? Do you claim all the childs tax credits/workiong tax credits/child care vouchers/child benefit you are entitled to ?It all helps.

I hope I am making sense to you, its harder to wrtie down than it is to say it :rolleyes:


I hopeyou have lots of positive responses and constructive help from members of MSE. We are a good bunch really.

Good luck,
Allison.

johannamse

Sarah

Yes - this needs moving to debt free board.

You need to get familiar with what you owe / what you spend.

You then need to contact the CCCS. Consumer Credit Councelling Service. https://www.cccs.co.uk. They are a charity (that the banks pay to support) and you will pay them no money to sort you out. I have never used them, but they always get good reviews on here. You will pay them a montly amount, and they will distribute money to your creditors.

You will be fine and you will sort this out. You need to get organised though, and start spending within budgets. This time, in 6 months time you will be feeling much better. By confronting this now, you will be able to get back on track before the problem escalates.

Good Luck.

Savvy_Sue

Again, the debt-free board is the place to ask I think, but can't you get a 'note of separation' put on your credit record to ensure that you're not tarred by your ex-husband's financial problems?