any money saving funeral ideas please

sellingmysoul666

This site is the one i turn to first for info & advise so as my dad died today & i need a bit of help i want to ask a general question -
has anyone any tips, ideas, experiences, useful websites re arranging a funeral ect ?

there is a "funny" side to this my dad was a basket maker & used to make willow coffins but he didnt keep one for himself

he was only 64 & was working the day before he went into hospital for tests on wednesday 6th of august he died on 13th in intensive care from Cancer of the Oesophagus/Pancreatitis

my mum wants to use a funeral director & we will have to buy a plot
dad was also self employed (mum has already contacted his accountant)
we are not strapped for cash as such but any advice will be gratefully recieved
thanks

ailuro2

Sorry to hear of your father's passing away, it is a shame he didn't keep some if his own work for himself. In times to come you can console yourself that your Dad didn't linger once he was ill although it's a dreadful shock for everyone left behind.

Like any other service, phone around a few places and ask them for their prices.Might be best to do this out of earshot of other family members, they might not be in as practical frame of mind as yourself.
Had he any friends in the business that would knock a bit off since he was 'in the trade' as it were. Any of the directors he spoke well of ? (or not! don't give your money to the ones that never paid on time!!)

margaretclare

Don't have limousines to carry the mourners. Nothing wrong with everyone using their own cars, and giving lifts to those without a car.

Don't have expensive flowers. Donations to charity are quite usual nowadays, with just one simple bunch of flowers on top of the coffin.

pukkamum

I would try and enlist some friends to help with any food you are going to offer after the service.
I'm sure many people would be happy to bring a tray of sandwiches sausage rolls etc.

Sailor_Sam

My mum always use to say when she falls off her perch, we were to ask the hospital which bits they could re-cycle, and anything that was left over could go in the wheelie bin on monday morning.
When she died last year, we asked the hospital could they use any organs, but did'nt use the wheelie bin. We told people not to send flowers and gave the donated money to my little nieces school/nursery, our mum would have wanted that.

pandora205

We had a mix up over ordering flowers for my mother's funeral last year, so we had to do our own. In the end my sister went to Tescos and brought lots of flowers in coordinating colours, then to a local florist for some more and to get some of the stuff for bases that you use for an oasis (sorry don't know what you call that spongy stuff). It cost about £40 for three displays. We had the most lovely flowers, many local, which were just as good as the ones someone else had paid £80 for, and there was the personal touch that my sister had made them. (She'd done a flower arranging course many years ago so that came in handy).

Sailor_Sam

Just been looking on this site. Check out " Green and Ethical" section, there is a thread, 'flat pack coffins'. Is it worth thinking about ?

naturally_2

Sorry to hear about your loss.

Friends and family always want to do what little they can do to help, so hold the gathering afterwards at somebody's house and get all the ladies to muck in to provide sandwiches, cheese on sticks, cakes etc etc.

You could get a simple set of flowers for on top of his coffin, and if you'd liek the church/crematoriam/wherever decorated then you could ask if any children attending would like to make a posy to display on the ends of aisles (if you make them with a ribon they can hang off the ends of the pews, IYKWIM).

Invites & directions can be simply a typed letter or handwritten cards from a suitable blank pack bought from WHsmith, Woolies or similar, depending on how many people you are inviting.

You could buy a nice hardbound book and ask people to bring a copy of any nice photos they have of him (or if not enough time they can post that on later) and a postcard written with their favourite memories of him to stick in like a scrapbook, rather than spend money on flowers etc.

Would he have had any colleagues who would like to make him a cask?

Errata

My condolences to you. Undertakers collect bodies from hospital using a stripped out estate car with a false floor. They can also use this for conveying the body to the funeral instead of the traditional hearse. Much cheaper.

sellingmysoul666

many thanks for the kind words & helpful ideas esp naturally (the scrap book ideas is excellant)
we found a coffin at my dads workshop today & a crematory urn :j
my sister & i have tried to persuade mum to get the undertaker to use one or the other using "the customer is always right" as this would make us very happy
the people he works with have already bought flowers & started a book of condolence they are also selling off his stock
i am also going to suggest the donation to charity option & I think mum might go for that one

i am going to have a look round here for myself

www.muchhoolewoodlandburialground.co.uk

i am also putting "get myself a will" on the to do list

Vashda_Nerada

Firstly, I'm sorry for your loss.

This tip is basically for later on once your dad has been interred. I used to work as a funeral director so I know what's what on this one.
A certain well known chain of funeral directors earn commission on headstones and engraving, they also cost a small fortune to buy direct from them. You would be far better off contacting stonemasons yourself (there are plenty around, they generally locate themselves near cemetaries or crematoriums), you would get a better deal and some of your money wouldn't be spent on lining the pockets of the funeral arranger. Believe me, a fairly large chunk of the money you would pay for the stone and engraving goes on commission.