What does a supportive parent do for their school age child?

HappySad

It has been said many times that children do well if they have "supportive parents". It can even mean that if a child goes to a not so good school that having "supportive parents" means that this child will still do well.

What is a supportive parent & what do they do? What do you do? Any good web site links on the subject?

My son is about to start school this September & I want to be as supportive as I can.

Thanks.

mrcow

Happysad,

You come across as one very supportive parent. I'm sure that whatever you choose to do, you will be100% supportive.

Just make sure that you take an interest in what your son is doing at school and that he is happy.

In my son's school,"supportive" meant teaching them to read....as the school didn't seem to manage to get round to it lol

Merlot

Supportive parents means simply helping your child, for example, with the reading book, at my sons school, my DS only reads to a teacher once every 10 days, therefore you can be supportive by helping your child to read his book, and hand his homework in on time. Support the school activity days, for example if the children have to dress up etc...

I don't believe in my honest opinion that a child can do well, in not such a good school even with supportive parents, my DS went to a school in a rather poor area 2 years ago (I couldn't get into my preferred primary school), and despite me and my OH spending time with him being supportive with the reading and homework etc, he didn't flourish until we moved him. Its the other children at the school whos parents maybe are unemployed, struggling with money/drugs etc etc have low aspirations/don't help there child and this has a knock on effect as the teachers spend alot of there time with the "naughty" kids.

penguin83

My eldest is just coming to the end of her first school year. As others have said I take an interest in her day and ask her what she has done. This year she has been learning to write so we have practiced forming letters and writing her name. She has also been taught about making different amounts using 1p and 2p coins so we have done some games around that. She also has a reading book that we read together. I think (or at least I hope!) that all the little things like that make you supportive.

ps apologies for the appalling grammar but its late! x x

morganb

I think being supportive means all the things mentioned above AND then making sure all letters from the school are read / all money sent in when necessary / all Mufti Days remembered, etc., - this is REALLY important to the children.

vixarooni

I agree with the above.

The main things are being there for your children. Its about security, being there for them when they get home from school. Nasty comments that you hear about yourself in the day make you down somtimes, it was nice to come home to my mum and have a cuddle and feel safe and secure.

For me it wasnt just about my mum helping out or asking me how my day was. That was good but it was nice to be met from school, allowed to play rather than being tied down to a reading book. My mum also came to the school to help with reading which i loved.

Its tiny things that amount to feeling well supported emotionally i think that is the main thing.

or it was for me, and it didnt stop at primary school, i was so glad my mum was there for me during the secondary school time cos that is when i needed her more than any time. (in some respects)

Titch89

My parents helped me with reading and homework.

Gingham_Ribbon

I think the best thing to do is to make home somewhere safe and happy where they can relax. School is a long time out of their day.

If they have been lumbered with homework, try to help them with it and make it fun. Encourage them to read and count without forcing it on them, just by playing games (like can you find 3 red cars and 2 blue ones - how many do you have all together?) and going to the library and reading the books together etc.

Keep a bedtime routine and include asking a few questions about their day without being too heavy about it, so they know they can talk about it if they want to and keep it to themselves if they'd rather do that.

Read their letters from school and try to keep up with whatever needs to be done. Go to parents' evenings and make time to talk to the teacher if she/he as any concerns.

And just try to be enthusiastic about school for them and hope that they love it.

k1mmie

I agree with all of the above. Just make sure you are aware of what your daughter's strengths and weakness' are. Help her at home where you can. As she gets older, be sure to understand what she likes and wants to do and not force her into something you want.

Encourage her wherever possible, so she know she can come to you whenever she needs to.

My daughter is nearly 19 and we talk about everything. I know her friends and where she is (even it means texting her at 4am to find out. lol). However, she knows I am there for her.

I'm sure you will be a great support to her.

benood

I'm not sure where supportive stops and "pushy" starts. I guess we're somewhere along the pushy spectrum :eek: . My OH is a governor and chair of the PTA while I audit the school fund. Day to day we read with the children, help/encourage them with homework and talk about our days at tea time.

I reckon that supportive is as much doing the reading etc. as engaging with school and getting to know the teachers and other parents a little (particularly at primary stage, things like going in and listening to reading - which we don't do) - I suppose subliminally getting across to the teachers that your offspring are worth them spending time on.

frostyspice

I'd also add, don't criticise the school in front of your child if you can help it. Sometimes schools and their requirements can be a bit irritating, but try to bite your lip if you can.

I don't think it's been mentioned, but don't be late in the mornings either! It sends all the wrong messages to the child and can be really isolating for them if everyone has started the day's tasks and they are just coming in.