Frump to Fab 2017 - A Whole New World

Ruby… I think a lot of fashionable types have discovered the corn silk powder to bake under eyes and foundation. I have noticed all the older products like setting lotions, big rollers and rose water. All these products seem to be increased in price a lot.

Shandy, I am sorry that you experienced such a rotten situation. I have experienced similar situations and generally I find bullies create toxic environments, where it trickles down the food chain, till the whole place is hostile and toxic. I have worked in places where you become so dehumanized that you feel you don’-t deserve any better. I have worked with narcissists. I have been there. They are bad people, of two I know very well, they have problems. I have seen the way narcissists interact with their children, marriages and addiction issues, be grateful you can leave their presence and get a new job.

Work place bullies are jealous and often eventually get found out but they can destroy lives and businesses. Walking away was the best thing you could do, it might seem hard but over a week or two your heart rate, digestion and wellbeing will return to normal. You will be more attune to them in the future’- listen to your gut in future as if you get any instinct of narcissism and run! Take your time in choosing your next role and try to meet the people to get the right role. You did the right thing getting out before it shattered your confidence.

I have recently been really busy with working in better places and with better people, being able to have some autonomy and control of life is better. I get to be an outsider with a sneak preview into the behind the scenes in different organizations. It is amazing certain things you see, but it is a truism happy working environment creates happy workers who hit targets and exceed them. Treating people with compassion, dignity and a sprinkle of irreverence makes the happiest environments, (oh and coffee and chocolate help too!).

I have been putting the make up on daily and more importantly removing it. I have tried to do a style or two and failing miserably’- tossing it in a bun or ponytail is not a style.

LaineyT wrote: »

I can totally relate on the abstaining from drinking Indie the occasional glass of wine with my meal is ok but anything more than that and I am larder raiding, mostly savoury stuff so crisps and nuts which instantly derails any healthy eating plans.
That said am off out for lunch today for birthday celebrations :j so will indulge in a glass with my food and thoroughly enjoy it!

Hope you enjoyed the birthday celebrations. I know exactly what you mean about the larder raiding... alcohol and self control do not go hand in hand. It's been suggested as part of the diet I am following that we go three months without alcohol. I've done half of that already so sounds fairly doable, although I am meant to be going to a champagne festival next weekend.... Mind you, I am having doubts about bothering. The dress code is "black and white" - now I have the odd summer t shirt that is white that I would wear when I have a tan, and I have black leggings I wear for running/working out, but that's it. I don't own anything vaguely smart in black and white. I am trying to resist the temptation to buy any new clothes at the moment as I haven't lost enough weight yet that I am too small for the clothes in my wardrobe. However, even if I had, I wouldn't buy something in black and white as it wouldn't do anything for my skin tone.

I thought when we paid £20 for the ticket it would include some champagne - but no, nothing included, £12 per champagne cocktail, no soft drinks on the menu and the food sounds a bit overpriced too. Might see if one of my friends can lend me anything black and white.... but I suspect I am a bit too large compared to them for it to work.

Was away one night on a course for work this week and it was incredibly full on, was shattered when I got home and ended up working from home yesterday and having a bit of a rest during the day as I had a dreadful thumping headache.

Feeling back to normal today and been off for a massage which was nice.

Off to the pub later for a friend's leaving drinks - she and her husband are moving to Devon. Not planning on having anything more exciting than water though - still feeling a bit dehydrated after the course - the rooms were overheated and there wasn't enough water available. The food wasn't the best either - am really feeling how much difference it makes not eating the things that work best for me.

Anyway, no courses this week so will be back to normal. Got a facial on Monday, a talk on the neuroscience of habits on Tuesday after work, Ceroc on Wednesday and dinner with a friend on Friday. Saturday morning I have a hair appointment (cut and colour), lunch with a friend, champagne festival (or not) in the evening and then my next Ceroc workshop on Sunday. No plans for tomorrow though and Monday is otherwise quiet so will get my food prep done ready for the week ahead so I can get back on the wagon.

Have a good weekend all x

Hi ladies I have missed you all

I've been back from Dubai for over a week now but busy playing catch up. We had a lovely time although the weather wasn't great. That sunhat which took me so long to find never made an appearance. :rotfl: Still I reckon I have a very good holiday wardrobe now for next time. :cool:

LL I was sorry to hear about the trouble with your sister. I hope it doesn't get you too down.

Chanie, do go back and see if they'll fix it for you. Have you used this salon before?

Indie I'm not sure I'd bother. What kind of champagne festival - that charges for entry - doesn't include at least one complimentary glass of champagne? Go to wedding fairs - every one I've been to has had a free glass of Prosecco - I'm not classy enough to go to the ones that have Champagne. :rotfl:

Before I went away I had a kind of "moment" which I think fits in well with this thread. I realised that I was saving everything for "when" or "until". "When I've hit my target weight I'll get my colours done." "I'm not trying on my wedding dress again until my body is how I want it". The problem is, "when" and "until" are not specific dates in my diary and due to my love of food they keep shifting. I wouldn't say that I was procrastinating, but maybe that I was holding off for perfection and I'm sure we'll all agree that we'll never achieve perfection.

So last night I tried my wedding dress on. I wouldn't say I weigh any less than I did in November when I bought it, but I think the weight must be my food baby because the dress no longer pulls across me. I am not getting my colours done any time soon but that's because I don't have the spare money and I don't need an excuse to go clothes shopping.

There's a 10 week course I want to do (Bloody Good Life 101) which I know will really help me mentally, and that's £500. I could empty savings to pay for it, I could put it on the 0% credit card, or I could wait for the next one, either in summer or autumn. I invest so much in my physical health but definitely don't put the same energy into my mental health. I have until next week to decide anyway.

DD265 wrote: »

Indie I'm not sure I'd bother. What kind of champagne festival - that charges for entry - doesn't include at least one complimentary glass of champagne? Go to wedding fairs - every one I've been to has had a free glass of Prosecco - I'm not classy enough to go to the ones that have Champagne. :rotfl:

Before I went away I had a kind of "moment" which I think fits in well with this thread. I realised that I was saving everything for "when" or "until". "When I've hit my target weight I'll get my colours done." "I'm not trying on my wedding dress again until my body is how I want it". The problem is, "when" and "until" are not specific dates in my diary and due to my love of food they keep shifting. I wouldn't say that I was procrastinating, but maybe that I was holding off for perfection and I'm sure we'll all agree that we'll never achieve perfection.

So last night I tried my wedding dress on. I wouldn't say I weigh any less than I did in November when I bought it, but I think the weight must be my food baby because the dress no longer pulls across me. I am not getting my colours done any time soon but that's because I don't have the spare money and I don't need an excuse to go clothes shopping.

I have to admit I am more of a prosecco girl than champagne - tastes just as good to me and much cheaper too! A friend has offered to lend me a dress so will see if she has something to fit but otherwise I think I might give it a miss... They're talking about making a day of it now and go to Notting Hill earlier and that's going to be tricky for me as I have plans to meet a friend for lunch.

I know what you mean about putting things off until some mythical point in the future when everything is perfect.. There's a good book on that subject which I should dig out & re-read.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Pursuit-Perfect-Chasing-Perfection-Happier-ebook/dp/B001NLL2U2/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1488799297&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Pursuit+of+Perfect

I spent ages putting off dating until I was slim... Well, I wouldn't have gone a date for twenty years if I had stuck to that one. Discovered when I was internet dating that plenty of men seem to either actively like fuller figures or are more interested in personality than figure. Had a bit of a hiatus from dating whilst I got over my last couple of experiences (heart break followed by a scary mistake) but am going to get back out there. Going on a workshop in a couple of weekends about how to meet guys, will see how I get on!

I also used to put off buying any nice / new clothes until I was slim - especially when I first put on weight. Ended up meaning I had nothing nice to wear so stopped going out... which of course was worse for me than just buying a larger pair of jeans - comfort eating and loneliness are good companions!

I definitely wouldn't save getting your colours done till you are at target weight (waiting till you have some spare cash is very sensible though). You don't have to change your wardrobe overnight. I started with a few cheap accessories and tops in my colours, getting some lipstick / blusher in a flattering shade and changing my hair colour the next time I had it dyed.

I gave in to temptation at the weekend and bought a new pair of jeggings in white stuff. My jeans are starting to get a bit loose round the middle and saggy on the bottom and I found I could get into a 14 in white stuff (am usually a 16) so treated myself. Also got a nice top that will work for both weekend and work use.
http://www.whitestuff.com/womens/tops-tees/red-lupin-tuck-front-jersey-tee/

Had a bit of a sort through of some clothes that were still bagged up post my moth infestation last year - seeing which ones are getting loose and which ones which were snug are now getting to be a decent fit. Got more to do today so I can leave some out for the cleaner to iron tomorrow. Am tempted to get a couple of new pairs of trousers for work, but I should wait till I get through my bag as am sure I have some navy chinos in there that had got a bit snug and should now fit again.

Was not entirely surprised to discover I didn't lose any weight last week - being away on the course for work meant I couldn't control my food in the same way as usual and I've been snacking a bit and having some more sugary things like dried fruit and nakd bars. Back on the wagon this week - making my soup for the week. Done one carrot and coriander and one roasted red pepper and tomato. Going to do some stuff for salads later. Think I will go out for a walk in a bit, my trainer is away this week so need to make sure I get some exercise.

Have a fab week all x

shandyclover wrote: »

Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts, and encouragement - it means such a lot!

Now, in the cold light of day I feel a bit overwhelmed with having to enter the job hunting arena again - but I am sure it was the right thing to do. I will not be asking for a reference, but my previous boss, from when I worked at BHS had already told me she would gladly write me a reference.

Good luck, am sure you've done the right thing, we spend too much of our lives at work to be miserable there.