Money Moral Dilemma: Should I tell my friend I want to pay less rent?

mangomaz wrote: »

Everyone is going on about how it's irrelevant how much the mortgage costs and that the relevant issue is comparison to market rates. But why is noone interested in the issue that we have found ourselves in nowadays where mortgage payments are often so much lower than renting, when historically it has been the opposite (and rightly so)? It doesn't say where the renter is living, but generally speaking the rental market is horribly distorted at the moment, and I personally find it appalling how so many people have to shell out enormous parts of their income to live in unstable and impermanent housing. Why is everyone in this thread ok with landlords exploiting peoples' essential need for housing?

I appreciate there are wider issues around the homeowner having to pay for the deposit and home owning responsibilities etc which I accept. I don't think bringing bills into the argument are relevant as normally bills are added onto rent and that doesn't seem to be part of the OP.

To be honest if I was in the position of renting out a room in a house I owned to a *friend*, I would be really happy to give the opportunity to escape the stress of rental to that person. I certainly wouldn't expect them to pay for my mortgage. And to people who are saying that the home owner wouldn't choose to have a lodger if he didn't have to/there are costs to having a lodger; maybe, but maybe they also figured the cost is worth it when you get to live mortgage free in your own home.

I'm really surprised how cold the people replying in this thread have been if I'm honest. And supporting of a system that encourages exploitation and funnelling of wealth upwards.

People aren't commenting on it because it would be going off-topic.

I don't think mortgage payments are necessarily lower than renting. Only if you have paid off a significant amount of that mortgage or have a large deposit, or the rates and payments can actually be pretty high. I don't remember a time when it was significantly cheaper to rent. Well, maybe back when the interest rates were in double figures...

Wouldn't say LLs are exploiting the need for housing. It's about supply and demand, surely. Believe it or not, some people choose to rent. And home ownership is not a right as some seem to think.

You have skimmed over 'home owning responsibilities', but that is a HUGE difference to renting. It costs a bloody fortune. My FIL's house has been neglected for years, so has my next door neighbour's, and they're bordering uninhabitable. It really doesn't take that long for a house to get like that without being looked after.

Re your comment about renting to a friend and you'd let them stay there for less than market rate, you're really not doing them any favours in the long term. If you're that flush or generous, pay for them to do a college course or something. What happens when you can no longer rent to them? Would they then have to find X number of hundreds of pounds every month to rent somewhere, or would you expect them to save their money for a deposit or rent?

Don't think people are cold, I'm sure many are generous, but having the p*** taken out of you is another matter. Helping someone get back on their feet is one thing, but having a 'friend' to stay for nothing or a token amount indefinitely is actually more of a p*** take.

For the record, no, I'm not a LL. And my OH lives with me who doesn't pay me a penny so I'm not making money off him - and I have a mortgage to pay. I like to think I am a fair, decent, generous person, but I would never let a mate move in and pay me squat/a token amount if they weren't planning on ever leaving.

mangomaz wrote: »

Everyone is going on about how it's irrelevant how much the mortgage costs and that the relevant issue is comparison to market rates. But why is noone interested in the issue that we have found ourselves in nowadays where mortgage payments are often so much lower than renting, when historically it has been the opposite (and rightly so)? It doesn't say where the renter is living, but generally speaking the rental market is horribly distorted at the moment, and I personally find it appalling how so many people have to shell out enormous parts of their income to live in unstable and impermanent housing. Why is everyone in this thread ok with landlords exploiting peoples' essential need for housing?

I appreciate there are wider issues around the homeowner having to pay for the deposit and home owning responsibilities etc which I accept. I don't think bringing bills into the argument are relevant as normally bills are added onto rent and that doesn't seem to be part of the OP.

To be honest if I was in the position of renting out a room in a house I owned to a *friend*, I would be really happy to give the opportunity to escape the stress of rental to that person. I certainly wouldn't expect them to pay for my mortgage. And to people who are saying that the home owner wouldn't choose to have a lodger if he didn't have to/there are costs to having a lodger; maybe, but maybe they also figured the cost is worth it when you get to live mortgage free in your own home.

I'm really surprised how cold the people replying in this thread have been if I'm honest. And supporting of a system that encourages exploitation and funnelling of wealth upwards.

As hazyjo pointed out, that's not the point of this thread. I strongly believe that the housing market in this country is ridiculous and that all property should either be owner occupied or council let as housing is a basic need.

I used to think like you, and when my OH and I were in the position to, we let out our two spare rooms at mates rates (50% of what another house in our road has a room rented out for) to friends who were in need. We thought we doing the decent thing and that in return they would be grateful and respect our home.

We were wrong, and while I'll let friends crash here for free if they are desperate for a few nights, I am not renting out again without an incredibly stringent vetting process! One lodger wasn't perfect but we were happy enough to live with, one has not done a single scrap of cleaning in 13 months (took the bins out for the first time last week...:mad:) will have left us with several hundred pounds worth of damage, and seemed surprised and unimpressed when we told them to leave. I suspect that friendship won't survive the experience, although we weren't close enough that I am that fussed.

For the "moral dilemma", if you agreed to the price before then their mortgage is irrelevant, but you can always try and renegotiate. But they can always hit you back with a higher counter offer or ask you to leave, so I'd only do it if you feel you'd be better off elsewhere!

You don't seem to understand that your rent bears no relation to your friend's mortgage payments; think about it - how could it?

What you need to do is decide whether your rent is reasonable having regard to the accommodation and use of services. If you reckon it is, then you're doing fine where you are, as you appear to be on good terms with your friend and a healthy tenant/landlord relationship is important. If you think you're paying too much compared with similar tenancies in your area, then you know what to do - move out.:(