Help - Spousal Maintenance

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  • LilElvis
    LilElvis Posts: 5,835 Forumite
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    Get a lodger.
  • Aced2016
    Aced2016 Posts: 293 Forumite
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    If you built up his business you should get something in the divorce then.

    I did advise you all the benefits you could apply for. And from a pride stance I wouldn't want a penny personally. I pay 50/50 with my husband but if he left tomorrow I can cover 100%. That's all my point was don't ever get in a position rely on someone else.

    If you apply for those benefits just now, things will get moving for you.
  • peachyprice
    peachyprice Posts: 22,346 Forumite
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    vivera01 wrote: »
    I know my responsibilities towards my daughter and myself and was just asking for some genuine advice during this transition period when I can stand on my own two feet.

    Could you ask your daughter's father to increase the maintenance he pays for her for a short while until you are sorted as he actually has a responsibility to help you with her.
    Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence and face your future without fear
  • antrobus
    antrobus Posts: 17,386 Forumite
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    vivera01 wrote: »
    ..Does anyone know whether I can apply for an emergency order for spousal maintenance and how I would go about it?..

    You can apply for an interim order it seems.

    You can apply to the courts for an order for your ex-partner to pay interim maintenance if divorce or dissolution proceedings are under way. However, this process can be expensive and you would have to convince the courts you needed the payments. Take advice from your solicitor, if you’re using one, about whether this type of application is worthwhile.

    https://www.moneyadviceservice.org.uk/en/articles/arranging-interim-maintenance-in-england-wales-northern-ireland
    vivera01 wrote: »
    ..I really need something in place for the next few months until I'm able to get back on my feet and support myself.

    Probably a better bet.
    https://www.gov.uk/jobseekers-allowance/how-to-claim
  • FBaby
    FBaby Posts: 18,367 Forumite
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    Been together 6 years and married for 3 years.
    Only married 3 years, this will most likely be considered a short marriage. You'll struggle to justify that you gave up a chance to a career and earning your own money to support him and your joint family in such a short time. Your chance of spousal maintenance after the divorce is extremely unlikely, before just about none.

    You both came in the marriage with your own property, it is very likely that you will go back to what you had before.
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,688 Forumite
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    vivera01 wrote: »
    I have a daughter who lives with us but she's not his.

    Already tried CAB who couldn't find it on their database so told me to see a solicitor. Local solicitors near me all said they can't offer free advice on this matter.

    I can't afford to run the house by myself and am worried sick about what to do next.

    I thought maybe I could get an interim order for spousal maintenance and it could be reviewed once I get back on my feet.

    He earns around £1250 per week.
    Didn't you ask CAB about what benefits you might be eligible for?

    If I were you I'd use the benefits calculator in the link provided earlier.

    In the unlikely event you'd get spousal maintenance, it doesn't sound like it will be a quick fix - and it seems that is what you need right now.
  • LannieDuck
    LannieDuck Posts: 2,359 Forumite
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    If he's been financially controlling, as you suggest, the domestic abuse charities will help you (e.g. women's aid).

    They'll have gone through this before with people and should be able to work with you to come up with an interim solution.
    Mortgage when started: £330,995

    “Two possibilities exist: either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.”     Arthur C. Clarke
  • kingfisherblue
    kingfisherblue Posts: 9,203 Forumite
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    vivera01 wrote: »
    I managed to get my husband out of my house following a bout of violent behaviour for which he was arrested.

    He has managed to take away any access I have to money and basically left me in the clothes I'm standing up in. I lost my job in October and have been unable to find another so have no income whatsoever. I have around £300 in my bank account.

    Does anyone know whether I can apply for an emergency order for spousal maintenance and how I would go about it?

    I really need something in place for the next few months until I'm able to get back on my feet and support myself.

    Thank you very much.

    I really doubt if you would get any spousal maintenace as it is so rarely awarded these days. My ex left me with three children, one severely disabled, and spousal maintenace was refused. I'm on benefits.

    In your shoes, I would apply for Jobseeker's Allowance and I would get my CV out there as much as possible. As you have experience in helping to build a business, you can apply for a wide range of jobs as you will have a range of skills.

    Emotionally, you may need help from a counsellor (via your GP or Women's Aid).

    Forty years ago, my mum left my father, who was emotionally, financially and physically abusive. She didn't know about any help available, and lodged (with my sister and I) with a friend. We had the clothes that we stood up in. My mum took a cleaning job, then another. Slowly, she built her life up, altohugh her confidence has always been low. Now in her eighties, my mum has shown immense strength through the years, and I admire her greatly (as well as loving her to bits!). She had a poor education and no family.

    Good luck, and I hope that you find the strenth that my mum did.
  • chesky
    chesky Posts: 1,341 Forumite
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    Your situation has changed completely since you originally applied for U.C. when you and your husband were living together. You will now be allowed a contribution to your mortgage interest as well as the job-seeker element. But it takes about six weeks at least to process the claim, so you'd better do it Asap. In the meantime you can request an advance on it and maybe apply to your local authority for a discretionary housing payment which is a grant to help with urgent housing costs.
  • pmlindyloo
    pmlindyloo Posts: 13,049 Forumite
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    chesky wrote: »
    Your situation has changed completely since you originally applied for U.C. when you and your husband were living together. You will now be allowed a contribution to your mortgage interest as well as the job-seeker element. But it takes about six weeks at least to process the claim, so you'd better do it Asap. In the meantime you can request an advance on it and maybe apply to your local authority for a discretionary housing payment which is a grant to help with urgent housing costs.

    Just to correct this.

    Help with mortgage interest is not available for about 9 months under UC.

    https://england.shelter.org.uk/housing_advice/universal_credit_housing_costs/housing_costs_under_universal_credit
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