DRO. Partner doesn't know about my debts please help.

Mumtmk · 2 December 2018 at 4:48PM

OK so I no longer work after mat leave due to childcare costs.
My partner has no clue on my debts at all except a very account with just £60 in it.
I have 3k on credit cards.

I now no longer have an income. He pays everything. Out his wages.
I use the 160 pm tax credits for fuel, baby items and items for my son and my mobile which is cheap.
Obviously this doesn't cover my debts.

I'm so stupid as I had cleared them and then PND hit and I went a bit stupid on cards.. Now on meds for it.

A DRO would want to know my partners income. But hell go mad at me if he found out as he thought they were cleared. I'm too scared to tell him.
Could I explain this to stepchange.. How would it work.

Me2you · 2 December 2018 at 6:01PM

You would explain it to your husband and stop burying your head

fatbelly · 2 December 2018 at 6:13PM

Partner income is only needed to allocate the expenditure proportionately. You say you have to income but use the Tax Credits - are they not in your name?

If you know his income (and that will be on the tax credit award notice)then an intermediary should be able to work out the sums.

The option of your address not appearing on the register is available to 'persons at risk of violence' but your name will appear.

Before you launch into a DRO for what is a fairly small amount of debt you might want to look at write-offs on mental health grounds if there is a professional who will support that.

https://www.nationaldebtline.org/EW/factsheets/Pages/debt-and-mental-health/mental-health.aspx

ALIBOBSY · 2 December 2018 at 6:29PM

The baby is not your son he is both your son so why on earth are you paying for all the baby stuff out of the benefits?

Plus you are a partnership and as someone who celebrates 21 years of marriage next week and 22 years living together you cannot have a long lasting decent marriage unless you can communicate with eah other.

Don't get me wrong it isn't easy and we have had some crazy rows over the years lol, but you get through the tough stuff and the difficult times and conversations by being honest and talking things through together.

Do you really need a DRO or could you make arrangements to pay on each debt? Call a free debt advice service to discuss. Less upsetting for your partner if you can say to him this is what I owe, its through these reasons and here is my plan to pay it off out of the benefits if you cover all the bills from your income.

Good Luck Hun its tough but you will get through this.

:A

Ali x

Mumtmk · 2 December 2018 at 6:48PM

I have an older child that's not my partners is what I meant.
I can't tell him it's my fault and I promised they were clear he doesn't know I have run them up.

I know his wages just about covers all bills and food. He prob has £80 a month left over.
That's why the TC each month buys items for the children.
I was stupid and I know that. I just need for my own sake for it to be gone for now. To get my pnd under control and hopefully things somehow will improve.
By a DRO I would then not be able to use any credit then hopefully be straight

DRO. Partner doesn't know about my debts please help.

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