Wedding Invites & Gifts, the quagmire

ani*fan · 18 March 2017 at 5:59AM

When I get invited to a wedding I want to give a gift. It's traditional, and it shows your good will as a guest. The couple have thought about me in their wedding planning and invited me to support their marriage. I want to do that.

It's always a help to have some idea of what the happy couple would like or need. I don't think the act of gift giving, or some indication of ideas for the gift, is tacky or bad form in any kind of way. I find it useful.

What I do object to is lists full of very expensive things. That looks greedy.

I have had reservations about asking for money as a gift for our wedding, but we're quite minimalist and definitely don't want stuff. We just want our loved ones to be there. After a quick round of calls to a few family and friends, the thought of no gifts at all was quite offensive to some. (Oops.

) Everyone seemed to think that a contribution to an experience on our honeymoon was a fine compromise.

So we did as mentioned above and registered with a site. It says where we're going and there are then choices of different experiences we would enjoy. Coffee and cake by the harbour, £10, a meal for 2, £30, and things like that. There is also a section for a random amount. The link to this site is on our wedding website. The wedding website address is on the invites.

I agree that asking for presents on the invite is bad form. It could easily look as if that was why you were inviting them. Our website also has hotel and taxi info, hairdressers info and other things our guests might need. We have thought about them a lot and I hope they get a sense of that.

matt1987 · 11 May 2017 at 4:12PM

We didnt want to ask for anything to be honest - like the OP on here, we have a house, its kitted out and dont need anything.

We were told by a few close family that you should put something about gifts in the invitation as people will expect it.

We created a gift list with John Lewis. Our honeymoon is also with Kuoni of which you can link to the gift list, even though the honeymoon has already been paid for.

We put in our invitations something like the only gift we could ask for is your attendance at our wedding, however if you would like to buy us a gift, we have made a gift list with John Lewis where you can buy an item or alternatively contribute to our honeymoon.

Nothing cheesy and cheeky - I really couldnt care to be honest, as I dont expect anything! The stuff we have put on the list are literally between £20-£40 in value so its nothing major.

Pollycat · 24 April 2018 at 11:13PM

nreyn
Even though you've been 'transparent' about advertising your website, it's still against MSE rules.

Reported as :spam:

And you've necroposted.
This thread is almost a year old.

Wedding Invites & Gifts, the quagmire

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