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Money Moral Dilemma: Is it OK if I don't pay for my Valentine's date?

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...
I'm a mystery diner, so I get reimbursed the cost of a meal for reviewing the service and food afterwards. I have a fine dining restaurant to review during the week of Valentine's Day. Is it OK to take a date and treat it as our Valentine's Day meal?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't always answer money moral dilemma questions as contributions are often emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be enjoyed as a point of debate and discussed at face value.

If you haven’t already, join the forum to reply.

Got a money moral dilemma of your own? [URL="mailto: mmd@moneysavingexpert.com"]Suggest an MMD[/URL].
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Comments

  • Comms69
    Comms69 Posts: 14,229 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    I fail to see the dilemma?


    If you do, you have a nice meal
    If you don't, you don't have a nice meal (but presumably would do something else)
  • Ozzuk
    Ozzuk Posts: 1,884 Forumite
    Eighth Anniversary 1,000 Posts
    Not really a difficult one, I'm assuming you mean my meal is free, should I pay for my date. So in that case:
    1. split the cost or
    2. Pay if you invited them

    Same decision as everyone faces on a date, its just yours is reduced cost.
  • clairec79
    clairec79 Posts: 2,512 Forumite
    If this is a current girlfriend (or boyfriend) then I would say you don't have to mention it (as they know it's your job)

    If this is a first date then I'd mention it to them

    Either way it's fine to go
  • marich
    marich Posts: 125 Forumite
    Well , I wish I knew how to become a 'mystery diner' . Truth is that you would not be writing into MSE about this if you were one .


    Another piece of #### from MSE Towers . This is not any kind of dilemma . WE - the real people out here - have our life dilemmas but they are probably too real and too personal and too complicated to get into four lines of type .


    When are you going to say something about exploitation , harassment , bullying or poverty ? How about job insecurity , the endless grind , the emptiness , pointlessness , heartlessness we endure ? Where are all the dilemmas that come from these ?


    Perhaps you should own up to nobody writing in to you with any realistic (or printable) dilemma . Anybody who looks at these weird and wonderful situations you dream up knows they are just #### .


    Oh for your dilemma !
  • marich wrote: »
    Well , I wish I knew how to become a 'mystery diner' . Truth is that you would not be writing into MSE about this if you were one .


    Another piece of #### from MSE Towers . This is not any kind of dilemma . WE - the real people out here - have our life dilemmas but they are probably too real and too personal and too complicated to get into four lines of type .


    When are you going to say something about exploitation , harassment , bullying or poverty ? How about job insecurity , the endless grind , the emptiness , pointlessness , heartlessness we endure ? Where are all the dilemmas that come from these ?


    Perhaps you should own up to nobody writing in to you with any realistic (or printable) dilemma . Anybody who looks at these weird and wonderful situations you dream up knows they are just #### .


    Oh for your dilemma !

    You can find out how to become a mystery shopper/diner on the ‘boost your income’ section. Lots of forum users do it.
  • Cheapscate
  • w0z
    w0z Posts: 60 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    hi marich
    why not give it a go - fitting it into 4 lines might be cathartic and you never know who might reply!
    marich wrote: »
    WE - the real people out here - have our life dilemmas but they are probably too real and too personal and too complicated to get into four lines of type .
  • Being a mystery shopper and being money savvy is part of who you are - but so is being honest (I hope). So if you are up front with your date in a "guess how lucky we are in getting this job this week so we can have a really special Valentines Meal" way. I'd say go for it.
    If you don't come clean, your date has every right to feel cheated. Besides, I am sure you need to make discrete notes, particular choices which you can't hide.
    Extra Brownie points if you spend some of the "saved" money on a decent bouquet of flowers. Please note that flowers from a garage or corner shop DO NOT COUNT. A bunch costing £10 - £20 from a supermarket is acceptable. Delivered to work may be worth the extra depending on your dates personality.
  • XRAT
    XRAT Posts: 242 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    Sorry, did I miss something? Is their pleasure relative to your pain? Surely what matters is your date having a great time?
    Would the meal taste any better/worse if you paid cash card or voucher? They have a meal and your company, use the money saved to do something else too if you feel you have to spend something.
  • As mystery diner I know you usually have to do more than comment on food, there are things that need timing and other areas of the restaurant that need visiting to include in review, sometimes with photos - difficult to explain unless date knows why you are doing this
    My suggestion would be to include your date in the experience, it’s quite fun and very suitable for a Valentine experience
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