mortgage-free by magic?

seven-day-weekend

Do those of you who are mortgage-free find that other people resent you for being so?

That they think somehow you have got there by 'magic' or a big hand-out, or by money growing off your cherry tree, or for some other reason other than you have paid (and overpaid) for a good many years until the mortgage has gone?

My neighbour in the UK is always pointing out the fact that he has a mortgage and wee haven't. He seems to think the money fell out of the sky, or that somehow the bank said we needn't pay any more after five years.

When I point out that we just paid it until it was gone, making small overpayments when we could, he doesn't believe us, but seems to think that a fairy waved a wand and the mortgage disappeared.

Far from it, we just paid it for twenty years like other people do!

I have also found other people who somehow seem to think we are 'lucky' not to have a mortgage.

How about you?

StuartGMC

We're not yet mortgage-free but getting there! However, there does appear to be two sets of people out there; those who just take the route of paying what the lender tells them (they don't put effort in to understand how to improve their position - your neighbour methinks!) and then those who take responsibility for their finances and to their best abilities, look to gain improvement (alone or with professional advice).

Even in discussions about offsetting, I know some people I work with think I have a massive salary to achieve it (which is NOT the case :mad: )

Perhaps you should point him direct to these forum postings to learn more?

seven-day-weekend

Thanks for your reply.

He does not use the internet, so these forums would not be of any use!

[Deleted User]

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

Do those of you who are mortgage-free find that other people resent you for being so?

Absolutely yes.

Since I paid mine off I cut my hours of work because I help to look after my disabled mum and without the mortgage I could afford to lose some pay.

My mum's illness over the years has got worse. I always knew one day she would need more care. I also know that there is no way I could not offer her a home when the time comes. THAT is why I got rid of my mortgage - it means that it is a big financial consideration not to be in the way.

People at work got to know my mortgage was paid off - probably because I had to formally apply to cut my hours. Since then I have had all sorts of snidey comments and even have ended up rowing with people over it.

Apart from it making financial sense it also means if my mum needs a home with me in the future - it's here for her.

I have never bragged about it to anyone at work - though I have good reason to.

I am the first person in my family to own a property and have done it through sheer hard work. I have never had any help or money left to me etc.. to achieve what I did.

The only person in my family I have told is my mum - mainly 'cos the rest of us are not that close and we dont see much of each other.

Meanwhile - I am enjoying the extra money, having things done to the house ,and putting some into savings.

I feel for those who still have a mortgage - especially in these hard times - but there is no excuse for the nastyness I have encountered (not at MSE) but at work - and especially as I have never told any of them my business.

seven-day-weekend

People can be so nasty, can't they. I can imagine the sort of comments you have had.

I am early retired now, but luckily when I was last at work, everybody else on my salary grade was young enough to be my son or daughter, so they expected me not to have a huge mortgage like they did.

We just worked and paid off the mortgage on our UK house and that's why we no longer have a mortgage on it, although we did have a bit of help when buying our Spanish house, with a modest inheritance from my husband's mother.

jetfighter

Oooh yes, this one really gets to me! :mad:

Not mortgage-free yet (working on it though) but when people find out we don't have any other debts, or that we have a decent amount of tax-free savings, they say "Oh aren't you lucky!" and I just think "No, we're no luckier than you - just more sensible with our money!"

These are generally people who earn a lot more than we do, as well as spend a considerable amount more. :mad:

Drives me mad!

seven-day-weekend

jetfighter wrote: »

Oooh yes, this one really gets to me! :mad:

Not mortgage-free yet (working on it though) but when people find out we don't have any other debts, or that we have a decent amount of tax-free savings, they say "Oh aren't you lucky!" and I just think "No, we're no luckier than you - just more sensible with our money!"

These are generally people who earn a lot more than we do, as well as spend a considerable amount more. :mad:

Drives me mad!

Yes, my neighbour mentioned in my first post has always earned more than my husband, his wife always earned more than me and now we are all retired they have larger pensions. Also they both have their State Pensions which we are not yet old enough to receive.

Also they have new cars and shop for their groceries at Marks and Spencers :eek: or Sainsburys:eek:

LindsayO

good for you Deleted_User, as a disabled mum, with a mortgage, I admire you for getting your mortgage paid off and for being there for your mum.
My girls are both making plans for the future that include help looking after me. I had hoped that I would be able to help them out financially when they came to buying a house, but I'll be lucky if I'm able to keep my own home, as I have a degenerative diseases that means I'll probably have to stop working before my mortgage is paid off, but while I can I'll keep working and overpaying.
But far from resenting someone like yourself for being so "lucky", it gives me faith, that things can work out for someone like myself whose health is failing
good on you gal

Deleted_User wrote: »

Absolutely yes.

Since I paid mine off I cut my hours of work because I help to look after my disabled mum and without the mortgage I could afford to lose some pay.

My mum's illness over the years has got worse. I always knew one day she would need more care. I also know that there is no way I could not offer her a home when the time comes. THAT is why I got rid of my mortgage - it means that it is a big financial consideration not to be in the way.

People at work got to know my mortgage was paid off - probably because I had to formally apply to cut my hours. Since then I have had all sorts of snidey comments and even have ended up rowing with people over it.

Apart from it making financial sense it also means if my mum needs a home with me in the future - it's here for her.

I have never bragged about it to anyone at work - though I have good reason to.

I am the first person in my family to own a property and have done it through sheer hard work. I have never had any help or money left to me etc.. to achieve what I did.

The only person in my family I have told is my mum - mainly 'cos the rest of us are not that close and we dont see much of each other.

Meanwhile - I am enjoying the extra money, having things done to the house ,and putting some into savings.

I feel for those who still have a mortgage - especially in these hard times - but there is no excuse for the nastyness I have encountered (not at MSE) but at work - and especially as I have never told any of them my business.

Dithering_Dad

I posted into a thread on the house purchase board and forgot to untick the "Show your signature" box. Someone asked me why I had my mortgage details on my signature and I responded by saying I was a member of the MFi3 group and that we use our signatures and posts on the MFi3 thread to see how well each of us are doing on the challenge. I also said that I usually removed my signature when not posting on the MFW board and said I would edit the original post to remove it.

I was then inundated with posts that said "You shouldn't be bragging about your mortgage repayment when other's are struggling", "you'll never pay off that mortgage in 3 years, what's the point of having a challenge you can't win?", "Why do you need to brag about your money in order to make yourself feel good?"

It was a disappointing reaction when you consider that MSE is where I got the inspiration to start repaying my mortgage and this is a financial website where people go for ideas and encouragement in pursuing their financial goals.

I am absolutely convinced though that if my sig was a DFW one, rather than a MFW one (the £150k challenge being debt repayment rather than mortgage repayment) it would not have elicited such a hostile response.

Its a sad reflection on society when having mortgage free aspirations causes such a backlash.

StuartGMC

Perhaps it is more a case that those in the other forum would not be negative towards people in a "worse" case, but, if the DFW signature was to clear £5000 but no other costs then I think it may have elicited a similar response as you received?

Interesting how even in this small "community" we can have such divergent attitudes when you think about it; I guess it indicates how a common aim/problem can foster a common attitude.

To clear the mortgage when the 1990s dream was to OWN your own home seems to have floundered in the mire of wanting everything and not accepting limitations on your personal finances and thus living within them.

I'll try to remember to remove my signature when posting elsewhere (and may even think twice before posting) based on your experience but let's all keep up the good work here :rolleyes:

[Deleted User]

I think TBH that when everyone appears to be in the same boat there is is lots of empathy and support - but when one person manages to break free of whatever it is, then some of those same people who were supportive, cannot control their envy and !!!!!iness.

i have no doubt it is the same in other circles - i.e weight loss groups, or people getting off alcohol/drugs, or whatever - it just seems a shame that when someone has worked hard to achieve something cannot be viewed in anything other than a bad light.

One person I work with is always complaining about her debts. As an ex CAB debt advisor I have tried to help her and also pointed her towards MSE for moneysaving ideas. But she really does not want to be helped - she just wants to spend, then moan she has no money.

Later this year she is going to college and has been granted a £3k loan - about which she sat telling everyone only the other day what she intended it blow it on!!!