Help me and my financial mess

Jo_R_2

Hi all

I'm in a right mess and don't know where to start to get myself out of it...

I've been depressed for ages now, worse over the last year. I got made redundant and luckily I got a small amount from work, and am claiming the appropriate benefits for my situation. I'm pretty much unable to work at the moment, though am hoping this won't always be the case, I'm on medication and obviously hoping soon enough (however soon that is) I will be able to look for a job.

Part of my depression means I am terribly forgetful and lack motivation. On the whole, I've always been pretty organised with paying rent, bills and so on. However, because over the last two/three months I have hardly been able to manage anything, a few things I have forgotton to sort out and now they are coming back to chase me and I am having a bit of a panic...

1. I got a letter from council tax this morning saying that as I have ignored the payment arrangement I made with them, the full amount for this year is due.

Around March (I think) time, I got behind with payments from the last financial year, and phoned up to let them know. I ended up paying the outstanding amount from 2007-2008 in April, and when I clarified this over the phone and explained about my redundancy and thus claiming Housing Benefit, the woman I spoke to said I would be exempt for 2008 - 2009 through claiming full HB. I understood I didn't need to do anything for this to happen and that it would just kick in. Obviously this is not the case!

2. I was at uni around 10 years ago, over four years and since finishing uni have deferred my loan as I haven't earned over the threshold amount. I completely forgot about filling in the deferment form, and had a phone call last week saying I was three months in arrears and if I didn't send back the stuff it would be referred to a debt collection agency. They kept asking if I could make a token payment, I said I'm on income support and can't make any payment until I specificially check my bank account. Should I do this?

3. I opened a new credit card account on a 0% offer to balance transfer from my old card that I was paying interest on. Somehow I forgot to set up a direct debit and because that meant I missed a payment, they took away the 0% offer and now am paying interest again.

4. I am paying off a loan I took out when with my ex. His contribution is the amount through the CSA of just over £5 a week, and I am left struggling to pay this loan which is around £154 a month. I think I'm in a tight spot - I know any money he gave me would be taken by the CSA because I'm on IS. My youngest is going to go and live with my parents for a few months and so I am going to have to transfer the child benefit and tax credits over to my mother, and I am realising this loan is going to bleed me dry and I have no idea what to do about it.

Things really suck at the moment. I've been cutting down my outgoings as much as possible anyway but things look so bleak at the moment, not just money but my family life and I'm finding it harder and harder to see any light at the end of the tunnel. I'm going ot try and make a list as that usually helps, but anything anyone can say would be really useful as I feel like carp at the moment. I've managed to keep a quite good credit history up til now and worry things are going to go horribly wrong and when I do feel better in the future and manage to get a job I won't be able to get a mortgage or any kind of credit I might need because of what's happening now...

never_too_late_2

Dearest Jo R,

I just wanted to send you a very big hug and say that though not easy to figure out your situation, there definitely is a solution.

On the whole though, you seem to be doing the right things like speaking to people and keeping the lines of communication open.

So don't give up now - you're definitely heading in the right direction babe and we're all here to help and offer advice.

Dare you put all the details down in harsh black and white?

Big Cuddles,
NTL
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bank_of_slate

Hi Jo_R
You are by no means alone here!
Please contact the CAB or CCCS for some advice on your situation.
The priority debt is the Council Tax one,
I would advise that you keep a diary to remind you to set up payments, etc.
keep posting for advise and support
...Linda xx

Jo_R_2

Thankyou. I've looked back at my post and am feeling the best way is to look at things one by one rather than the massive whole, so I am just going to phone up the council about the council tax.

After that I am going to gather all my documents for my student loan deferment application. Then I am going to make myself leave the house to go and buy a stamp and post it. Little steps and all that...

bank_of_slate

Exactly!
By taking little positive steps and keeping accurate records you can and will make a difference, do you have any diaries lying around or post it notes on the fridge to make sure you do everything on time?

PS, sign up for the postage survey, they send you a load of free stamps just for signing up even if they don't keep you on!
see Freebies- no spend required thread 'Fed up of postie' (link now below)
https://rmselfrecruit.research-int.com/Questionnaire/qstIntroductionPrivate.aspx
...Linda xx

Jo_R_2

Thanks again for the positive words. After I posted on here yesterday, I sorted out the council tax situation, it seems all it is is that I didn't fill in a form somewhere along the line but they're sending me another to fill in and it should (fingers crossed!) be okay and I will be exempt due to paying full housing benefit.

I also sent off my student loan deferral form, so that's another thing to cross off the list!

I've collected together various letters to take to my parents today to do with child benefit and tax credits so I can transfer this over to my parents. I'm really going to have to tighten my belt now, my next step is to sort out a better deal for my broadband and phone as I realised I'm paying over the odds.

I went to the dentist this morning, bad news is I have to have a wisdom tooth removed. I had to pay £44 for my referral, not sure how this works but the dentist said they send this off with the referral to the hospital. Got some lovely anitbiotics as it's all infected - ouch!

Also a chap from the garage popped round yesterday. My car broke down on the dual carriageway last week (all very dramatic and extremely scary, broke down in fast lane, me and my oldest stuck stood on the central reservation with cars flying by..!) Seems it's gonna cost more to repair than it's worth but might be a blessing in disguise, can get about £150 for scrap, then can cancel car insurance. Will be a pain but will obviously be saving money. I'm sure those of you with kids know how much easier it is with a car, but I'm trying to convince myself it's a good thing really!

Got2change

Just wanted to post and say WELL DONE for taking steps and making the efforts to solve some of the problems you have. It sounds as though you have had a tough time of it and even the most simple thing has seemed huge.
So double well done because you find it so difficult. I agree that small steps and one thing at a time is the way to do it.
Keep up the good work!

stilletto

just wanted to add my congratulations for facing up to it, and to say well done for the small steps - I've been unable to work for nearly 2 years after a bout of severe depression, so I can totally relate to the forgetfulness and lack of motivation!

I'm lucky to be on the road to recovery, and starting to sort out my own mess, so I've realised how very important the small steps are when it feels like you cant face the big ones. (my first small step was simply managing to get dressed in the morning! might sound daft, but its true. I'm now well enough to be job hunting again, so keep going, you will get there.)

you're definitely on the right path, and you'll get lots of help from the all great folks here xx

Jo_R_2

stilletto wrote: »

I'm lucky to be on the road to recovery, and starting to sort out my own mess, so I've realised how very important the small steps are when it feels like you cant face the big ones. (my first small step was simply managing to get dressed in the morning! might sound daft, but its true. I'm now well enough to be job hunting again, so keep going, you will get there.)

Doesn't sound daft at all - I know *exactly* what you mean!

Today I phoned up Child Benefit and Tax Credits to let them know of my change of circumstances with DD2... In a strange way, although it was quite sad, it has motivated me to carry on and make those financial efforts to keep on top of things, I know how much it helps my state of mind when I'm not worrying so much about money. Thus I can think ahead to how I'm helping myself be more organised and have more time to focus on helping myself get better and eventually have DD2 back with me.

My goal for the morning is to write a letter to confirm to Child Benefit the change in circumstances, so my mother can start to claim CB for DD2. The next step after that is to phone up my broadband provider to get a cheaper deal. I've got a couple more things but just looking at one or two at a time, it seems easier that way...

smashedbooboo

Hi hun, well done on posting. Baby steps all the for now. Its amazing how much you can sort out that way. Doing one thing at a time and putting it to bed as it were is good. its one less problem to deal with. You are now on the road to recovery. keep posting honey. You will have loads of support here. And you never know you might make new friends along the way as well. I did. Linda, Bank of slate is someone i met on here. She is a star, she has supported me in all sorts. And been a shoulder to cry on when i have needed it. Good luck with everything. Its time to start afresh now. x x x x

never_too_late_2

Well done Jo - you are totally on the right track and it's so good to hear the results you're getting back already. Keep going and don't be too hard on yourself, there is A LOT to say about small steps.

Keep posting with news/updates and I'm sure we'll all keep reading and supporting.

Best of luck and hugs,
NTL
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