help please !

ub40fan_2

hello,

I'm new and really need some help.

A little background:

My husband lived with his ex until his son was 7.
After he moved out he continued to pay the household bills and gave her weekly money too.
Ten years ago he moved in with me and my 2 children. Obviously things had to change - so he paid her a regular weekly amount (almost as much as the CSA calculated is right for BOTH my children) - this continued until his son left college. We also contributed to school uniforms, school trips, furniture, took him on holiday, he stayed with us one night a week until he was 15 - in short he provided for his son.

Not long after his son turned 18 - we received a bill for £38,000+ :eek:
Certain that it was a mistake - we rang and explained the situation. We had a visit from a CSA representative and the matter was investigated. We heard nothing more until 6 months ago - when we received a letter telling my husband he owed £16,194.06.

It seems his ex is, and always was, claiming benefit (apparently even while my husband was living with her, and he was working full time!)

We have been told we should have kept proof - hindsight is beautiful but useless. And surely she should have declared the income - but instead she is still claiming benefits and 2 years ago found she had fallen pregnant again:rolleyes: just as her only child reached working age - sorry if I sound bitter but I would dearly love to have a child with my husband but we can't afford to.

We feel we are being penalised for making a private arrangement - even though the CSA have suggested I make a private arrangement with my ex.

We feel the situation to be very unfair, my husband HAS supported his son - if we pay this debt we will be being made to pay a second time.

They expect the debt to be paid in 2 years - thats £675 per month - that 's what we pay out in rent !?

We truely cannot pay this - we are self employed and business is suffering due to fuel prices (we are in the taxi trade)

We have been considering bankruptcy, and now we have had a letter saying the debt must be paid in full in 7 days or bailiffs will be sent.

I am sick with worry - if we go ahead with the bankruptcy will this debt be dealt with along with our other debts? Afterall, his son is now 20 and the money will not be going to his ex.

Any advice will be greatly appreciated,

Thank you.

pinkpig08

Did he pay her in cash?.
At the end of the day she is the one who's been fraudulent by not declaring the payments. Does he have any proof he was paying the bills? Bank statements etc?

How did he manage to come to a private arrangement? I understood that the payments HAVE to be made through the CSA if the PWC is on benefits. Was the case started years ago? If the arrears have been accrued after all this time have they sent you previous letters asking for payment? If not they need to be asked why not.

Sorry I can't offer much in the way of advice, but someone will be along soon in a better position to offer it than me.

ub40fan_2

Yes, he did pay cash - we're a cash business - my husband was just doing 'the right thing' and paying towards his childs up keep - he was unaware she was on benefits while he lived with her. And we didn't realise payments had to be made through the Csa if a person was on benefits. The first time we had any letters from the Csa was when his son was about 16 - we phoned and told them we were paying direct to her - we heard no more until a couple of years later - when we got that huge bombshell.

Loopy_Girl

So if the first letter you received was when he was 16 and he is now 18, it should be 2 years arrears then? As arrears can only be counted from the date of contact so you would need to establish that.

Her being on benefits and taking CSA is nothing to do with you - she is the fraudulent one, not you (or your hubby).

As there is no proof of payments being made to her then I think it's quite a grey area really. It's her word against yours and from what I can gather, the CSA aren't really interested in cash payments unless they have been documented.

If it was me, then I would get myself to CAB (or your MP actually, that may be better) and see if you can strech the payment plan further. The argument that 'the money is not going to her' won't really wash to be honest as it will be said that is to be paid back to the state to make up for the benefits she claimed.

She's played a really dirty game to be honest and you have got caught in the crossfire. Yet another selfish PWC who takes the pi$$ and tars all decent PWC with the same brush.

Re the bankruptcy - having just read through all English law for personal reasons, it did state that enforcement action could still be taken after date of bankruptcy. I don't think CSA arrears can be counted in an arrangement - sorry.

enemes

Hiya

Forgive my ignorance, but I am a little confused ... unless I have missed something somewhere.

If she was on benefits, then the CSA would have had to be involved. Thus, at some point, your OH would have recieved a Maintenance Enquiry Form. If he hadn't, surely there is no date in the past from where an assessment could have been initiated.

As pinkpig08 states, she has been fraudulently not declaring her 'income'. Nonetheless, even with hindsight, surely he must have kept some kind of record of payments he has made.

Sorry - there's something not quite right here. I would suspect your only hope is trying to arrange with his ex some kind of settlement, after all, she could be liable much more back to the DWP.

lauren_1

Sorry for your situation but unfortunatly considering bankruptcy cannot help you as child maintainance is a third party debt and will not be included in any petition to the courts, my ex tried this on many occasions.

ub40fan_2

Thanks for your advice.

I think we didn't hear anything initially because the benefits people used not to bother so much if you didn't give the fathers details.

It looks like we are still going to have to pay but we will be going to CAB and get some more advice.

I feel very bitter though - his ex hasn't worked ever! And now I wish I hadn't either. My husband is 55 - at a rate we can afford, he'll be 73 before it's paid. In the meantime she's had another child that the state will have to support.

kelloggs36

You need to contact the CSA and ask for the Effective Date ie the date that the MEF was first sent to your hubby and to what address it was sent. If no MEF was sent, then that means that no arrears can be charged. Apply for the data protection file which will show this detail as it will have been entered onto the system.

If a MEF was sent out and ignored, then if it was sent to a confident address it can still mean you owe arrears. The point is proving that you didn't get the MEF - if it was sent to an incorrect address then you may be able to prove it if you have letters showing where you lived at the time etc.