OH still Spending

MERFE

Just found out yesterday that my oh has spent 250 pounds last month on something we do not need and I dont even want, incredibly selfish considering I need new trainers (have had the same pair for 5 years now) but am waiting till we are debt free unless they fall apart! It seems as fast as I am sorting out paying stuff off he is spending it again and it doesnt matter how much I explain we will be so much better off debt free. He keeps having a go at me to get the cam belt done on my car which I have agreed needs doing just wanted to save to pay for it and he goes and spends that much on nothing really.

I've not spoken to him yet since yesterday but was thinking I am now gonna ask him to cut up his cards since he doesnt seem able to control his spending, How do you think he'll take it or how should I broach the subject.

I thought he got it but obviously he doesnt, might make him do a few car boots too till he has made all the money back, he needs to realise he can not spend money we have not got.

seven-day-weekend

Hi there, no advice about your husband other than you need to sit down and have a good talk (£250 is a LOT of money), but you really do need to get your cam belt done asap as if it suddenly breaks it will wreck the engine.

(I only know this as we had ours done recently too!).

cat4772

Merfe

My husband was a bit like that, I'd make financial plans and he'd go and spend money left, right and centre (and commit the worst sin - withdraw money on his visa:eek:)

Ask him to keep a spending diary to see where his money is going (mine was adamant he wouldn't keep a spendin diary, so I'd give him money each day ONLY if he'd write on the notepad what he'd spent the current day... voila a spending diary). Really helped him see where his money was going.

Loads of other examples, but the key is communication. Money talks were as simple as "I've paid £30 off the visa" to discussions about what to save for, whether to balance transfer to a card in my name (transferring debt from him to me). He's happy for me to sort out the money but equally I want him to know what the heck is going on!

Good luck with it.

Cat.x

MERFE

Thanks for the replies, I do talk to him about the money but when he wouldnt show me his credit card statement yesterday I said if I dont see it how am I supposed to sort out the money and that I wanted it all paid off by june because his 0% runs out then, it should have had 85 pounds on it but he had spent 65 pounds that I did know about but had forgotton and another 250 pounds. We both seem capable of keeping daily spends down, there isnt really anything we need to get but if he wants something he'll just go get it no matter the cost, its the big purchases that are a problem and he doesnt talk to me about it first.

Just before christmas we spent nearly 2000 pounds on 0% cards trying to get him his class 1 license and now he has changed to a job that will train him after he has been there a year but he is on agency first for 10 weeks so because of the week in hand we are currently working a week behind on everything and he is not getting as much as he used to even working every other sat so things are tight at the moment anyway until he is taken on in june. We then spent about 1000 pounds last month so he could have a motorbike - this benefitted me too as it means I can have the car at home and its halved our petrol costs but is a set back to being debt free although we should still be able to manage it in 2 years, hardly a long time to go without, then we would have a spare 450 pounds a month.

Do you think it is because I dont work so he thinks its his money?

He had a defaulted debt when I meet him and although I didnt help him pay it off I did organise him better so he wasnt getting bank charges and able to pay it off sooner. So he wasnt able to get credit for a long time and it was great, I didnt want any and he couldnt get any and our money was ours and I really want to get back to that but he is just not bothered. It just so depressing that as fast as its getting paid off its getting spent again.