With the risk of getting my head bitten off can I just say

scaredwitless32

That , I myself , am a relative 'newbie' to this forum. I have found it a HUGE source of comfort and its been a bottomless pit of information, for which I am very grateful ! It certainly got me through a very worrying time :beer:

Although I dont post very often, I do still read the board regulary and I try to help out where I feel I can, but as 'our' BR was straightforward , I dont have the knowledge that some of the more experienced members have like, fermi, Rog2 or Richard_S, pilnicandamy, etc However I have noticed that recently, there have been a number of posts that dont quite stick to what the OP is asking and that more of a personal judgement is given on aspects of the posters life/situation. :eek: I would just ask that, before replying to a thread, remember how you were feeling when you started this process of BR or trying to find a way to deal with being heavily indebt. It's a highly emotional and tough time. The slightest hint of any judgement of my situation, when I first gathered the courage to post, would of sent me fleeing from this forum never to return again , maybe..................so please a little more tact if you would

Bismarck

I think a lot of us are actually a lot more stressed than we would freely admit....the crunch seems to keep getting louder and nearer and the nervousness is contagious....

wherediditallgo

I agree with scared. Giving constructive opinion/advice on their debt-related problems is one thing, but negative comments about other personal issues they may have mentioned in their post isn't always a good thing. We can all ramble from time to time, & when people are under pressure things might be posted a bit chaotically & may be included unintentionally. It's easily done, & it's best we keep our opinions on the "by the by" issues to ourselves, especially with new people who've already had to muster enough courage to post in the first place.

Broken_hearted

Ok so what was the question

philnicandamy

BH it doesnt matter what the question was its not fair on the OP or the posts mentioned to be repeated here again..thats not the point of this post...if your that interested search

cmd:0

I agree too, it takes alot to face up to situations many have found ourselves in and having a forum such as this is great for sharing advice, help and support.
It would be a great shame if newbies are put of by the fear of being judged.

I don't think any of use should feel we are able or qualified to comment or give advice on other people private life unless directly asked to.

dalip

I am one of those who recently passed a judgement rather than give advice!. All i can say is i put my fingers in to gear before my brain:o . I applogise to all you forum advisers who never let personal opinions get in the way of their advice. If i had not been banned from looking or posting on a certain thread i would have put this there. So i would like to thank SW(was your title just a coincidence?) for giving me the oppitunity by putting this thread on. Again i am sorry for posting my opinion. Hope you all forgive me.

empty_wallet_2

I've noticed especially on a friday afternoon and saturday morning that our board is frequented by many non BR/BSC's who seem to think they are judge and jury, i'm not sure why a moderator does not ban some of them as one 'chuckles' or something like that seems to come on to start an argument and this person has in excess of 1,000 posts to his/her name yet still posting on these boards, these people are often known as 'TROLLS' on other forums as they just join to start arguments. i read one poor members post and they attracted 5 non BR members all giving there twopenith's worth of bulls11t.

betterlatethannever

I agree totally, but i think sometimes we 'forget ourselves'.
We gain a very intimate insight into peoples lives when they come on here - how many strangers did i tell i was up to my eyes in debt and why? NONE! yet people (myself included) come on here and pour their hearts out, telling us things they wouldn't even tell their friends.
We've felt the pain, we've been where they are now and it can become difficult not to pass comment/share our own experiences.
I don't think i've seen many judgemental replies on here, except from the Bankruptcy bashers that occasionaly frequent these boards when there own sad little lives mean they have nothing better to do.

philnicandamy

The shame is because of the nature of this board & the way the "brilliant" moderation works it's always gonna attract the so called BR "experts" not a thing we can do apart from report the posts and move on...I've been on the receiving end of many posts from people who know better & to be honest after the last time I felt like walking away and never posting here again...the only thing that keeps me here along with other regulars is people like I was in need of help/support/advice may finally pluck up the courage and make a post and nobodys around to help.....worst thing you can do is get into a discussion with so called "experts"

So_Sad_Angel

betterlatethannever wrote: »

We gain a very intimate insight into peoples lives when they come on here - how many strangers did i tell i was up to my eyes in debt and why? NONE! yet people (myself included) come on here and pour their hearts out, telling us things they wouldn't even tell their friends.
We've felt the pain, we've been where they are now and it can become difficult not to pass comment/share our own experiences.
I don't think i've seen many judgemental replies on here, except from the Bankruptcy bashers that occasionaly frequent these boards when there own sad little lives mean they have nothing better to do.

Hi, Can I just add that when I came to this forum...just a few weeks ago now...I was at the lowest point ever in my life.. People on here understood immediately & I can`t express just how supported I felt from my very first posting. It is SO difficult to share with others the desperation that extreme debt causes & it does`nt matter how it`s caused . The good thing here is that its not how we got there ...but how we are going to deal with it going forward . It takes a lot of courage to ask for help & I`m sure there will be someone reading this who does not know where to turn next. This forum offers that opportunity...for that I will always be grateful.

I have had nothing but support here & have tried to pass that on to others. This forum has been a lifeline to me.

Hugs :A to everyone, Angelxxx