Finally facing up to our debt - feel depressed!

happyjazza

Hi everyone
I'm new to posting - 1st timer - have been looking at the website for a couple of weeks now and have finally realised that we need to face our serious problem or we could lose everything! I'm totally ashamed and embarrassed and dont think my husband realises how bad it is.

So here goes, this is my SOA

Mortgage £1538.85
kids clubs £20.00
car insurance £22.51
tv licence £11.61
bt £11.00
life insurance £27.27
life insurance £42.32
Talk talk £12.00 approx
electric £58.00
council tax £193.00
water £40.00
home insurance £23.40
gas (oil tank) approx £50.00

loan £384.65
loan £331.07
car lease for 2 years £119.82

credit card £172.00 min monthly egg 0%
credit card £250.00 approx Virgin 0%

husband brings home £2700.00 from our business
tax credits and child benefit £522.00

I have just done the budget planner and we are short about £800 per month but I knew this and that's why I took out the virgin credit card to help us get through. I've put £5000 from the virgin card into the savings and used the rest to clear overdrafts and a flexiloan acc. My husband doesn't know I've done this but we need the money to help meet the monthlys until we can re-mortgage in July.
I've just accepted an evening job (I'm at college in the day training to be a hairdresser and have just over a year to go) i'll be earning approx £700 per month, start in approx 4 weeks. We also have an annexe which I think I might be able to let out but again, my husband wouldn't like this and I'm not sure how I go about this - wouldn't want strangers here at weekend.

What do you think? My husband and I have just argued because I said we didn't have the money to pop down the local with a load of other villagers and their kids to watch the cup final - he's gone with my son and I'm here worrying about our situation.

There, I've done it. I've finally got it all out. Feel sick and awful about the situation. We live in a lovely village and have a lovely house and everyone else appears to be coping ok and I feel like we're slowly going under. My husband wanted me to pack up college and get a full-time job but I paid a lot of my money to do my course and know that I can work for myself when I'm qualified. Anyway, just wanted some kind words of support really, feel like i've got the weight of the world on my shoulders.

Hell1

You have really come to the right place. No one will judge you, just give you lots of support. I'm a newbie here myself so can't offer advice, but do want to give you hugs! Someone more knowlegable than me will be along in a minute!

Bismarck

Thanks for posting and big hugs.

More knowledge folks will be along soon but for now, think of this as being your first steps towards a new lifestyle that you can enjoy. This last few months/years will not have been fun, I can appreciate that. Unfortunately, your OH is unaware of the extent of the situation so won't understand unless you explain how important each £ really is in your circumstances....I bet that if you'd gone to the pub, you'd have been unable to face the drinks because you knew how much they really cost.

Your OH does need to know or this will just get worse. He'll also find out at some point - this is a problem you can't fix on your own and he'll notice the cuts that you have to make. Imagine hiding it for 6 more months and getting a strange phone call and he answers the phone....or opens the mail first...

please do it or the strain will break you.

For what it's worth, more people are struggling than are letting on....

MissEyre

Hi there, welcome!

Could you put the totals for the cards and the loans please, as well as the minimum payments? Also couldn't see anything there for food, toiletries, road tax, car maintenance, petrol etc-the more info you can give, the better the advice will be

xxx

happyjazza

will do - expecting OH back any mo so will do it discreetly after dinner - thank you for taking the interest and time in me.

tallyhoh

Check if you need such high life insurance cover. Some of it may be for the mortgage but you should be able to get it cheaper, try an insurance comparison site.

Why dont you wait a few days & show your husband this thread? it may make him realise whats really going on. If you get a full time job you may lose a lot of working tax credit so you could point that out to him.

Puzzledbubbles

Hi,

Have you thought about showing your hubby the SOA above? that way you both have a clear idea of everything that you owe and it might make it easier to see the reality.

I have had to sit hubby down with all of the bills and spreadsheets etc to show him how much we both need to pay to ensure that we are in the black at the end of the month.

hth

Puzzled

Bismarck

sorry tallyhoh, disagree.

happyjazza is going to do it after dinner...after so much build up and adhrenline she will probably explode if she doesn't.

do it, get it done and move on...there'll never be an easy time and if you do it after dinner you've got some time before work hours again....

good luck, we're thinking about you.

Spendaholic_Chick

I agree, life insurance seems really expensive. Check if you can get it cheaper, and if so go through Quidco and get the cashback. I checked for myself a few days ago and can get more cashback than the policy costs!

Also, while you're at it, check you're on the cheapest you can get for gas and electric.


*edit* Just noticed your car lease - is this necessary? Could you give it up and buy an old banger tht will see you through until you remortgage?

happyjazza

hi everyone
thanks so much for kind words and for generally showing an interest - feels good to know i can talk about this.
I spend approx £100 a week on food/cleaning/toiletries etc. and I have managed to reduce this from £130. Also been shopping at Tesco now and collecting points and buying a lot of their own brands.
I spend about £30 a week on petrol and that's it for the car because I lease it so all other costs are picked up by the leasing agent. OH car is company vehicle so again no costs to us there.
Loan 1 got approx £16,000 left to pay at 5.9% (60 @ £384.65, 48 left)
Loan 2 got approx £9,000 left to pay at 5.9% (60 @ £331.07, 31 left)
Virgin cc - £10,860, min payments £253.00
Egg cc - £8424.00 min payments £168.00 both cards on 0%

RAS

Jazza

Re the car leasing - is that for your car? Can you get out of it and buy a run around? Do you even need a car?

Also is the CT over 10 months or 12 months?

You really do need to start getting the monthly spends down ASAP.