Hello all

cunningfox_2

I am Mike and I wish this site was about in my darkest days!

8(ish) years ago my debts were over £25,000 and the thoughts of ending it all were not only made but actions had started (I intended to slit my wrists in a nice warm bath) the bath was run, the knife was selected and place in the bathroom (for some reason I even put bubbles in....)

I went to wait for it to run, then my dog (RIP) put his head on my lap and brought me back to life (if you are interested I wondered who would look after him, thought my missus would - then BANG realised it was her who would find me!)

I still messed about for about 6 months before I got help with depression, then spent another few months denying the problem. Eventually admitted it to myself and finally to my long suffering partner!

We contacted CCCS and my life changed I was suddenly able to afford things at then end of the month!

I paid off almost everything over the next few years, then changed jobs so did not have the time to go to the Post Office anymore. All my creditors left were happy for similar direct payments.

Everything was good in the garden, except one debt which I could never get through to - in the end I refused to pay them and they "threatened" me with sending the debt to the collection agency (Mercers if anyone knows them) I was delighted with this as they were happy to take my card details over the phone and deduct £30 per month for 5 months and all my original debts are gone!!!!

However Mike is a silly boy and recently realised he had managed to build up debts of almost £3k - but these are considered good debts apparently so although not a problem they are still annoying!

I figure if I can clear £25k in 7 or so years I can do it again and I'll have a nice deposit on a house (so I can be in debt forever!!!!)

I just wanted to introduce myself, say to people I have been there and although it is hard you can come out the other side!

I have picked up a few tips and used the bingo loopholes today while off work, my missus was unhappy that I had not done the housework but was happy with the £150 I had earnt!

So while my target is not the same as many of the guys here, I will be in the same boat as many of you!

Good luck to everyone and if I can help I am happy to do so!

Be strong!

(Jesus I have just realised I have written an essay!)

hooty2001uk

Hi, sorry to hear what you have been through...And well done and good for u for pulling through. Thanks for the advice and hope you continue providing good sound, been there done that advice for all of us.. Andrew

tallyhoh

:hello: Hi Mike, I wish my OH would see any sense at all. 2 familys lost, 3 prison sentences & several near misses & he still thinks he knows how to work the system.

HairyHandofDartmoor

Hi. I'm so glad you thought better of ending it all previously and you have done fantastically well to pay off so much debt.

You should manage £3000 more easily. You are right to be concerned about being in debt again, but at least you know what to do now.

southernscouser

cunningfox wrote: »

(Jesus I have just realised I have written an essay!)

Honestly, just call me SS. Everyone else does.

Glad you got through the other side mate. Debt can be a horrible dark place but it doesn't have to be. This place is like a never ending burning candle.

All the best for busting the debts. :beer:

mummum2

Hi Mike,

Firsly your post bought a tear to my eye, well done mate for tackling debt and demons. All reading this should get some insperation/comfort from it. Well done, and thanks loads.

MMx

monkey22_2

Hi Mike,

I know it's not funny, and I'm very glad you didn't go through with it, but the bit about the bubbles did make me laugh!

Good luck with your debt-free quest, I'm sure you'll pay it off in no time.

cunningfox_2

I'm sure I'm not the only person who finds their own episodes of depression easier to deal with with humour - however dark or slanted that may be!!!!

The detail of the bubbles has always amused me too, why? What was going through my rather scary mind at that precise moment? Getting clean was hardly the point of the exercise!

I also had another part when I was diagnosed with mild depression I told myself - "see you can't even do depression right!"

I have to say that depression is something that affects people in different ways and my war with it uses humour as a wepon. This is not to belittle others in the situation, we must all fight it in whatever way we can.

I am very lucky in that I have always been quite self aware and now if I start noticing signposts to a place I don't want to go I take a few days off and do everything I can to ensure I turn about and fight the gathering storm!

A good indicator is not always waiting till you are at the stage of crying and always upset but before that you (well I certainly) have quite a period of being listless and disinterested in everything - at this point I find something - anything, to focus and be interested in! Not saying it will work for everyone but it works for me and I have not had anti-depressants since my major problem.

But hmm this is not really a "mental health forum" so I will quit my ramblings!

earthmother

cunningfox wrote: »

(well I certainly) have quite a period of being listless and disinterested in everything - at this point I find something - anything, to focus and be interested in!

I have mild depressions - and that is exactly how I notice and deal with them too - I plan the life out of everything. I think that's why next Christmas is already sorted, and now I've done all I can with my SOA/snowballing for a few months, I've started to attack the kids birthday parties (April and September) and the summer holidays with a vengeance - anything to keep my mind active.


So glad you came through it all, and good luck with clearing this bit.

ShelleyC_2

So glad you came through you darkest time & good luck clearing you debts again.

I apologise but I did chuckle at bubbles

kittiej

Thanks for posting your experience Foxy.

I just hope any desperate MSEers reading this can find hope and comfort from what you have written.

Well done you.