State pension : pensioner supporting younger wife

jennifernil

Not all "stay at home wives" are sitting about doing nothing.

While I may indeed be a "dependent", I have never really seen myself as such.

I married after University and we had our first child a year later. For several years after that I was very ill, but after a big operation I was restored to as good health as possible, but left with a lifetime disability. All this time I was looking after our son, our house, running the family finances.

After 15 years a miracle occurred and our dear daughter was born. Meantime my Dad had died so I also had my Mum to think about. We decided to all move in together, so I designed a house for us, supervised the building of it, chose all the materials etc.
Once we moved in there was still a lot to finish. I organised all the materials we needed, planned and planted the garden. OH did a lot of the work, but he had me to do the ordering and be here for the deliveries. Together we make a good team.

It has always been my "job" to take care of the house, the finances, his tax return, and look after my Mum, I had no time for a job! Without me to do these things OH would not have been able to get on with his career, make trips abroad on business etc.

Once the house was finished I had time to do other things, I even thought of taking a job! But OH's income was sufficient for us, and my Mum would have been alone too much, so instead I turned my hand to growing plants, involving my Mum in this. I did this for 14 years, 8 with my Mum's help before she sadly died at the age of 78. The plants were sold for charity, over the years we raised over £40000.

So here we are, OH retired last August at 65, I was not quite 59. I have earned no pension of my own, so he gets a bit extra for me. We have never claimed any benefits, though we did of course get child benefit. OH has never been unemployed, I have never claimed anything on the grounds of poor health. It never occurred to me that I should. To look at me you would not know I had any problems, and I have never let them stop me tackling anything.

I liked being at home, my children liked that I was there for them. My husband was glad that he had less to worry about, and my Mum had someone to look after her. I feel I have been a useful member of society, even if I never got paid. So I think I have earned the little extra OH gets to "keep" me!

seven-day-weekend

jennefernil, please lett me say that I don't think there is anything at all wrong with the way you have lived your life, it is a choice many people make and for ages anyway you were looking after your mum and running a business.

You have indeed imho made a great contribution to the home/family and anyone would be wrong to think otherwise.

I myself had fifteen years at home doing a job of only a few hours a day as it suited our family to do so.

I supposed I assumed, rather naively, that someone under retirement age who didn't work SOLELY through choice (not talking about those with family responsibilities os sickness/disabilities here) would not be entitled to any State Benefits until they reached retirement age.

Whenmy son was small and I was earning less than dole money because it suited the family for me to work only a few hours I wasn't entitled to any benefits and I just assumed it would be the same with an older person of working age.

I still don't see why it should be any different and that's all I'm saying.

I do agree with Margaretclare though that the tone of the OP's original post was a little condescending and had very much the tome of 'the little woman' about it.

seven-day-weekend

More like three life-sentences Margaret. They only last about twelve years these days, don't they?

bryanb

Many of the above posts miss part of the OP's first post. They seem to concentrate on the sending out to work part without recognising the first 2 words - "is it ........" he was asking something not advocating "sending little woman out......."

Sterlingtimes

bryanb wrote: »

Many of the above posts miss part of the OP's first post. They seem to concentrate on the sending out to work part without recognising the first 2 words - "is it ........" he was asking something not advocating "sending little woman out......."

Quite correct, bryanb, I was asking a question primarily for early pension planning purposes. It wasn't intended to be a politically loaded question. And I now know the answer.


For my part, I see much inconsistency in the implementation of these new age rules. It is just too simple to say that the rules up to 2010 are abhorrent and the rules after 2010 are absolutely correct. Women who do not work may give a lot back to society both in terms of dedication to the family and in work for society.

seven-day-weekend

Sterlingtimes and bryanb I agree that women can and do fulfil important functions at home if they chose not to work - in my post above I say that I myself only worked a couple of hours a day for nearly fifteen years because it suited my family for me to do so (although during this time I did a part-time degree and some quite responsible voluntary work)- I was just querying the fact that someone who doesn't work THROUGH CHOICE should get any State Benefits.

Well now I know. They do.

And what I found condescending in the first post wasn't the OP suggesting his wife went to work , it was how he phrased it - him 'sending' her to work as though she had no say in the matter.

No-one 'sent' me to work or for that matter 'made' me stay at home - it was a joint decision between me and my husband about what was best for the family.

Our last two years of working before we took early retirement, in fact, I went to work and HE stayed at home as he was not able to work through illness.
He often came out with me when I went on site while I was working so we could spend more time together.

I hope this has cleared up some misunderstandings.

bryanb

Ah! I've spotted your mistake, State pension is not a state benefit. It is an entitlement, paid for via NI contributions.

seven-day-weekend

bryanb wrote: »

Ah! I've spotted your mistake, State pension is not a state benefit. It is an entitlement, paid for via NI contributions.

Not by a person who does not work through choice .

I still don't see why they shouldn't wait until retirement age to get anything, like anyone else would have to.

However, as I say, the Government says something different so my opinion is immaterial.

bryanb

If you checkout previous posts you will find that both my wife and I have always paid full NI contributions. This in spite of choosing not to work and living outside UK.

bryanb

In addition it should be said, my wife gets nothing, I get an allowance for her, Anyone can claim the same, I did wait till pension age. The only difference is that I read the regulations and acted accordingly.