'Home alone' - what age?

kate1976

My son is nearly 13 and I've just started leaving him home alone a few hours at night (normally between 7pm to 11pm) so I can socialise more, he loves that I trust him, he also loves the peace and quiet when I'm not there waffling on and on! Can I just add though that I'm not leaving him every night, just the odd night!! The rest of the time I just lock him in the attic!!:p

He's a sensible kid, I wouldn't leave him if I didn't think that obviously! He also knows he can get in touch with me on my mobile, he can also phone my parents or get a neighbour!

So long as you trust your child is mature enough to stay home alone then go with your instincts.

snowmaid

Some mornings I leave my 10 year old as I have to leave for work. He has a check list which he checks before leaving the house. His lunch, key, mobile is ready for him. He has an umbrella in his bag. He eats breakfast before I leave and is dressed, teeth brushed etc.

He phones either myself or my husband as he leaves the house. The school is a 5-10 minute walk away. Once I know he has left the house, I give it 3-4 minutes and then phone him to make sure he is ok. Once he reaches the school, he phones me/hubby to let us know he is at school. He knows he has to be in the school grounds.

On going home he phones me/hubby to let us know he is leaving the school grounds. He will then phone again as soon as he reaches home. Hubby usually gets home about an hour after that.

He is very responsible and thinks we baby him!! :rolleyes: Once he couldn't get hold of us as I was on the tube and hubby was in a meeting. He had the sense to send me a text to let us know he was at school.

He is very reliable and I know he will not deviate from what he has been told to do (only because I have threatened him with aftercare which he detests!)

On the same note, my sister wouldn't leave my nephew who is the same age as he is just not mature enough. So it is up to the individual child.

Uniscots97

mrcow wrote: »

It depends on the child. There is no legal age.

If you feel that your 10 year old is mature enough, then you are the best judge of that. Some children are not mature enough at 14, but then again, others are out baby sitting by then (I know I was!).

Silly question, does that apply for Scotland? I remember the social work department always telling people (when i worked for the council) that a child under 16 wasn't allowed to be left alone. Just curious.

snowmaid

unixgirluk wrote: »

Silly question, does that apply for Scotland? I remember the social work department always telling people (when i worked for the council) that a child under 16 wasn't allowed to be left alone. Just curious.

Is it possible that that applies to being left alone in the evenings? While I am reasonably comfortable with leaving my 10 year old in the morning and afternoon, I wouldn't be too keen on doing so in the evening.

tiff

As parents its difficult making that first step, isnt it? What I find strange is that kids that have just started senior school are able to walk home with their friends (no adult), but not supposed to be allowed to be left at home until 12 (NSPCC guideline given above).

snowmaid

tiff wrote: »

As parents its difficult making that first step, isnt it? What I find strange is that kids that have just started senior school are able to walk home with their friends (no adult), but not supposed to be allowed to be left at home until 12 (NSPCC guideline given above).

Are they perhaps referring to being left alone overnight?

tiff

Could be, talk about a grey area.

tiff

Following on from this, I believe 10 is too young, but what age would you say take them to the cinema with their friends and pick them up, or to bowling etc? None of my sons friends have been left like that afaik, but I would be interested to know around what age. I'm assuming 12/13?

snowmaid

tiff wrote: »

Could be, talk about a grey area.

Well, they wouldn't want to put it in black and white lest you sue :rolleyes: ! I have also read some of the guidance and I cannot believe how they avoid making hard steadfast guidance! Incredible! I know every child is different, but they can really offer more guidance than they do.

Poppy9

tiff wrote: »

Following on from this, I believe 10 is too young, but what age would you say take them to the cinema with their friends and pick them up, or to bowling etc? None of my sons friends have been left like that afaik, but I would be interested to know around what age. I'm assuming 12/13?

My DD and her friends first went to the cinema alone towards the end of Y5. Typically one of the parents would take them, see them seated and then go off around town for a couple of hours and return to collect them as the film was finishing. Now DD is almost 13 I drop them off outside the cinema or they may go around town shopping first. She just rings when she wants picking up as being girls they like to go back into town to do more shopping or get a bite to eat.

Bit nervous as she is off to Alton Towers next month with the school (about 1000 children are going on a convoy of coaches). There is one adult supervisor per coach but once there they are on their own. She could have gone last year in Y7 but she didn't feel ready but this year is raring to go.