How do you handle the dreaded you don't seem happy at work conversation

Ella_fella

Any advice please how to handle the above conversation delivered by your boss at work, you don't appear happy at work and we don't want you to be unhappy....was delivered in the most awkward style and took about 3 iterations to still not directly say what they actually meant as a solution....I guess it was said for me to read between the lines but what to do next? Wait until the inevitable or arrange a further meeting (which I have done already but not sure what exactly to say)...

I have no employment protection btw so they could get rid of me with my notice period without reason (even though I have performed admirably in my few months within the business).

I'm guessing that they want me to take the message arrange a meeting and negotiate some exit package or do I just wait it out to see what they intend to do about the situation.

Apologies if a bit of a ramble but I personally abhor the take the hint kind of conversations like this.....

oldernonethewiser

How happy do they want you to be?

Are they suggesting your work is poor or you aren't fitting in with the rest of the team or as you suggest they are looking to manage you out?

Ella_fella

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82147347#Comment_82147347

No I made the point in the meeting that I take great pride in my achievements within the business since I started, the MD had to agree. He was the one whom initiated this meeting.

I don't know as I am crap at these read between the lines conversations am assuming it's a we don't want you to be unhappy so am happy to discuss means of your exit with a bit of extra cash to help you on your way but you initiate this conversation as we are too cowardly to actually say it.

But seeing as the nature of the problem wasn't specifically mentioned or discussed I'm going with the I take the hint without it being explicitly stated.

lincroft1710

Well, are you? Happy at work, that is. If not, why not? Is anybody actually "happy" at work, or do we just tolerate it to put food on the table, clothes on our backs, pay rent/mortgage.

Put the ball in their court, say I am quite enjoying it here, why should you think I was unhappy. Be positive, forthright but of course polite.

Ella_fella

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82147362#Comment_82147362

I did say that I come to work every day and try and sort my best... then the MD laughed and said that doesn't sound like you're very happy.

It just seems like there's an agenda here, he set the meeting up and then took about half an hour to say well if it's the company that you're not very happy with the I'm (he) is able to come to some arrangement with me....

oldernonethewiser

As above, turn it round and ask them why they think you are unhappy.

I had a colleague who was very good at his job and a new HR person asked him why he looked so miserable at his work.

He told her in no uncertain terms that he did the job to the best of his ability and that didn't require him to be smiling and jolly all the time.

El_Torro

You say that you have not been long enough in the job to have protection. Then you say that your MD wants to offer you money to leave. If your MD wants you to leave why would they offer you any money? If there is no protection they can just get rid of you without a fuss anyway.

Brie

Needing to change things to make work a happier place doesn't necessarily mean paying you off to leave. It might be that the awkward chat was trying to consider if you want to change your hours, work from home more/less, take on different/more/less duties.

Personally I consider myself a fairly cheerful and positive individual but apparently my face looks miserable a lot of the time.

Savvy_Sue

As above, are you happy? Or at least, happy enough? If so, throw it back at them.

If you're not happy, is there actually anything they could do about it?

If not, start job-hunting, but you don't have to make it easy for them. They might, genuinely, want you to be happy!

vacheron

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82147362#Comment_82147362

As I keep telling my wife when she complains about having to do some thing or other at work. Salary is compensation to stop you doing other things you would rather be doing. If work was enjoyable it would be called "Fun" and you wouldn't get paid for it!

Also, some people just don't look "happy", even when they are. Also some people just aren't happy people even when things are all satisfactory. Just because you aren't always giggling like a toddler in a sweetshop doesn't mean that you aren't necessarily satisfied in the job you are doing. 🤷‍♂️

Marcon

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/82147373#Comment_82147373

That's not a hint- he is spelling it out for you: your face doesn't fit but we'll do the decent thing and pay you off rather than just sacking you. Make sure you agree a reference as part of the farewell process.