Needing some support/advice

Ta2dUK

Hi everyone,

I’m really struggling and could do with some advice/support, as I’m at the point now where I can’t afford to repay my debts. Sorry if this gets long I know I will ramble.

I’ve always worked from being 16. Back in October 2024 I was headhunted for a new job and took the opportunity. 2 days before starting I found out I was pregnant (after many many years of infertility and failed treatment 10+ years prior, so completely unexpected). I knew I wouldn’t get statutory maternity pay, but planned to have 8 weeks off and live off savings and then return to work and my husband would handle childcare and we’d pay for childcare to cover any shortfall (he works nights).

fast forward to June, 2 weeks before baby is born and a very high risk pregnancy, the company closed down and I was made redundant.

Baby is now here, healthy and absolutely incredible! I applied for maternity pay which I was accepted for, but it ends in April 2026.

I’ve been applying for jobs since October and I’m not hearing back. I was initially being a bit choosy as I have to work around my husband and also factor in that I would earn enough to cover childcare costs, but I’m getting nowhere which is soul destroying having been earning £45k a year and now only bringing in £180 a week approx.

My savings are now gone (£8k alone was spent building an office for this new job but I did have a bit left over that I have used to live on the past 8 months!!) and this month I won’t be able to afford to pay some debts. Some I’ve had for a while and others have built up just with general living costs this last 3/4 months especially.

I’ve spent years making sure my credit file is excellent, not missed payments, overpaying (or paying in full) credit cards etc. but now I’m £30k in debt with no job and I am terrified.

Stepchange have recommended a token payment plan, since I’m still looking for work and hopefully things will improve sooner rather than later. But how badly is this going to mess up my credit file? And how easily can I recover financially if I were to get a job in the next 6 months? Will 6 months of token payments be easy to recover from or am I ruining things for the next 6 years? Is a DRO a better option if I will ruin things for the next 6 years anyway?

How do people manage this? Childcare is extortionate and a minimum wage job, which I’m not too proud to do by any means as I want to work and set a good example no matter what the job is, would only just cover childcare costs so it feels pointless for me to work just to pay for someone else to raise my child and give me £100-£200 a month leftover which doesn’t even cover my dogs vet bills for example.

I don’t qualify for any benefits as my husband earns £29k PA, so we don’t qualify for anything except child benefit. I would qualify for Jobseeker’s Allowance after my maternity allowance ends. His wage is currently going towards all household bills/utilities, and covering my car insurance, petrol, food. He has nothing left after paying bills.

I am sorry this is so long. I’m just so scared to not pay what I owe and I’m not sleeping and starting to panic about the future I thought we’d have as a family. I know I need to make calls to the companies I can’t afford to pay, but my anxiety is so bad I just can’t talk on the phone to anyone.

Any help appreciated.

fatbelly

Token payments are only a short-term plan and usually we recommend stopping payment completely. But in your case you have a realistic prospect of things improving so go with Stepchange, review in 6 months. Let them do the communication.

A DRO is usually a good option if you qualify but requires your situation to continue for 12 months. Give us a statement of affairs if you want more detailed help

https://lemonfool.co.uk/financecalculators/soa.php

RAS

You do need to start looking at how to claim JSA based on previous contributions, rather than UC. Check the criteria now. It could give you some respite.

And please stop worrying about phoning. We recommend you don't phone because it's easier for your words to get misrepresented. Write, email or use their on-line chat system.

You are allowed under GDPR to tell them to remove your phone number, if you want.

ManyWays

Are you buying or renting?
I agree with @fatbelly that token payments are the obvious option until you find another job. You can't afford anything. A good credit rating is no help to you at the moment, and borrowing more to keep up the debt payments to protect the rating is a fast road to disaster.

gwynlas

You are not alone with debt issues and a SOA might help you look and have advice on where savings can be made.

Congratulations on being new parents and you whilst you are correct in not wanting to pay childcare it is often easier to get a job from a job meaning being employed and up to fate in your field might pay off.

It is unfortunate that you were headhunted, fell pregnant and was then made redundant all within a matter of months but things will get better

Smudgeismydog

I’m so sorry to hear about all the things thrown at you in such a short space of time, I really hope it hasn’t impacted the joy your longed for baby has brought.

I would agree with @gwynlas in that getting back into the routine of a job, and then finding a better job from a position of employment can often be easier. We do suggest completing an SOA, as having other people look through your income/expenditure can be helpful in spotting things you might not have thought of.

This will get easier, and you will have support here to help you through x

Ta2dUK

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/81886381#Comment_81886381

Thank you.

I did speak to CAB a while ago to make sure I wasn’t entitled to anything else. As the maternity allowance is higher than any other benefit, that’s all I was entitled to and my husband earns too much to qualify us for UC.

I probably do need to get in an application for JSA soon though, as the maternity allowance ends in April.

I didn’t even consider being out of work would be my current reality at this point!

Ta2dUK

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/81886435#Comment_81886435

Currently renting.

Ta2dUK

It’s a real catch 22 when it comes to childcare. I waited all these years (20+) to have a child and even temporarily having someone else raise them whilst I work for basically nothing (possibly even a cost when you factor in travel expenses and wear and tear on the car to get there and pick up afterwards as we live very rurally) doesn’t sit well with me. But I want her to see me working and set a good example. I’ve never not worked and haven’t even had a sick day in over 10 years.

You are right though, when you’re in a job it’s easier to find work. We found that when my husband was made redundant multiple times several years ago.

Ta2dUK

I still feel like I’m in a dream I never want to wake up from! I feel extremely fortunate that we were given this miracle!

I haven’t actually been stressing too much as I never expected to be in this position and was expecting to start applying in October, have a job for the new year and all would be perfect! It’s only the last couple of months as the moneys got tighter and things feel like they have have become overwhelming, I think externally I am putting on a brave face but internally I am now freaking out. Next week will be the breaking point as that’s when I have a credit card bill due and not enough money to cover it. The following day, same thing.

Being parents is the most wonderful thing. And if I mess up my finances for 6 years, it doesn’t matter as we have her and can start rebuilding. But the thought of her seeing me worried about money, not being able to give her the life I promised, debt collection companies knocking on the door makes me feel physically sick and so anxious. I don’t want any of that for her.

I will look at doing a SOA this week. I’m sure there are a few areas we can save money in.

RAS

It'll be little comfort, but your situation isn't uncommon. The big difference is that most couples have been actively trying with the expectation of getting pregnant easily and made no plans for the changed finances.

With respect to childcare, when will you be able to get some free support? And maybe consider whether working part-time might be as financially viable as working full-time? Particularly as the first £12.5k is tax free?