Turning Straw into Gold: Creating Long Term Security & A Solid Home

twiggy86

I just wanted to say that I really think you're doing great! Any money saved/ paid off debt is great!

However, if feels like you're trying to achieve everything at once - paying down debt, paying down mortgage, building emergency fund and investing! My concern for you is that you won't feel like you're making progress on any one of those things because your money is split between going in so many (good!) directions!

I've been around these boards for too long and had too many false starts at getting debt free. This time I really focussed on one thing at a time, which made me feel like I actually made progress because I could tick actual things off the list before ploughing on with the next! That said this year I have (for various reasons) paused debt overpaying and instead am trying to save to move house and get married - so I'm back to feeling pulled in a number of directions (which is perhaps why it struck me when reading your diary).

But as I said - as long as debts going down/ savings going up, you're heading in the right direction!!!!

MillQueen

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/81862353#Comment_81862353

Thanks for the encouragement and the suggestions. Yes, you could be right. I suppose I could drop one of the things - it would probably have to be the mortgage over payment. I had followed some sort of calculator to arrive at an overpayment amount for that, but I could just let it run on its own. The postgraduate loan is the thing I’m keen to get rid of.

MillQueen

I have stayed sensible, getting “Too Good To Go” from Aldi tonight rather than any sort of payday larger spend. I’ll do some batch cooking over the weekend and eat some stuff out of the freezer for the next few days.

MillQueen

I was thinking further about the prospect of "just focusing on one thing" and how it is indeed motivational to see a particular number going up or down by a good amount. So I decided to think of things in terms of my net wealth, as all of the other strands contribute towards that. Pleasingly there has been a £426 difference made there in January with the various over-payments and adding to savings. I'm probably going to be in the minus figures for at least 10-15 years though 😅. My net wealth is currently about minus 204k 😶 so if I can get that under the -200k mark by the end of the year overall, that will have been good progress I think.

MillQueen

I am going out to see a friend for lunch today and this involves a £20 train journey and probably another £20 on food. I have gone a bit "no fun" now, where I feel a little resentful that I'll spend money rather than staying home and making soup. I only eat out a couple of times a year, but for various reasons, we have to meet up in a specific place and it doesn't give a lot of options like meeting up at home for a smaller cost. Once I get into something, I tend to really get into it and it takes over everything, so I must remember not to be anti-social, as I do actually love my friends and being a cheap hermit really inhibits spending time together 😁.

MillQueen

The total cost of the day out ended up being £70. It's quite worrying how much it costs to go out now. My friend really wanted to go to a certain restaurant and I didn't have the heart to say no. I haven't any more treats planned for this month, which is good as that's a big chunk it's taken out of the money that would have gone into the emergency fund. I don't have any more social events until April, so I should be able to catch up. It makes me think of that Dave Ramsey quote "the only time you should see the inside of a restaurant is if you're working there". It was a nice day though and good to see my friend despite the money guilt.

How are you all dealing with allowing yourselves to do things that go against your financial goals?

liselle

I think it’s so important to get a balance - maybe starting a Social Fund, p’rps putting in more than you’ll realistically need every month.Then putting the monthly surplus into savings and/or debt repayment.

MillQueen

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/81864162#Comment_81864162

That's a good idea. I could put away £50 a month as I don't often go out socially and then at the end of the year either use it for gifts or pay down the loan. I need to become better at negotiating free or low cost things to do with others, as I often find that those around me think I "should" spend my money on "enjoying myself" going out, and it's always felt like I'm being mean if I explain that those things don't matter to me, aren't enjoyable, and I wish to prioritise long term goals instead. I tend to go along with the peer pressure…

I'm back on track today, making soup from some vegetables I got from Too Good To Go and I'll eat that for a few days. I've just sat back down to continue looking at used cars, to get one this month.

Blackcats

hello! I find that having a personal spends allocation each month helps. It can be set at an amount that won't impact on debt busting but be enough to give you some fun options. It's available for guilt free spending and once it's gone it's gone. When we are debt busting over a long time frame we need some sparks of joy. I spent £10 of this month's money on some earrings and I'm really looking forward to wearing them tomorrow.

When the weather is better could you arrange to socialise with a picnic lunch in a park or at a beauty spot? Grab a meal deal and enjoy your own pop up restaurant in a nice place. Brunch or coffee and cake meet ups are often cheaper than restaurant dinners if that might be a good alternative sometimes.

Keep plodding - you are doing great.

MillQueen

Thanks @Blackcats, I like the idea of some fun money, as being too extreme about not spending on anything frivolous at all will soon lose its momentum once boredom sets in. I think I'm going to budget for £30-50 and then I can adjust it up or down as needed. My current joy is buying bits for the house from charity shops. I think you can be surrounded by beautiful things very cheaply, so I have been collecting art and a few bits of furniture over time. I have started from having nothing to go in the house and I'm in no rush to fill it, so I am taking it slow by buying an item at a time when I see the "right" thing at a good price. My favourite items so far have been a lovely king size four poster bed that I got from market place for only £50, and a huge antique farm house table that I've sanded, painted and waxed, which was a bit more expensive at £150 but the already finished versions I saw were thousands of pounds. I was excited last weekend to find a folding wooden table for £3 so I can use my laptop on the sofa. I've had a pretty good few days since getting paid and I have only spent on needed things: petrol, then I spent £50 on supermarket necessities (cat litter, cat food, bin bags, milk etc) and then I spent £3.30 on Too Good to Go. If I can have a few hundred at the end of the month to split between debt, mortgage and savings again, I will be happy with that. It should be doable, as I spent last month doing a lot of extra work and so I should have some money coming from that soon.