ADHD, Debt & Struggling to Manage Money – Any Advice?

PJB87

Hi everyone,

First time poster here- *gulp* 

I was diagnosed with ADHD last year (and have an autism assessment coming up). I’m 37, work as a mental health professional, and earn a decent salary. But despite that, I’m in a lot of debt and really struggle to manage money day to day.

A big part of this is my ADHD symptoms—impulsivity, memory and concentration issues, difficulty tracking spending, and struggling with small print on important documents (e.g. like the time I didn't read my homebuyer reports properly, which led to very expensive issues after buying a house). Because I earn a reasonable income, I always fall through the net when it comes to financial support, so I’ve tried to fix things by taking on loads of private work on top of my full-time job. But this just leads to burnout, and I still don’t feel in control of my finances.

I’m wondering if anyone has similar experiences and has found ways to make money management and budgeting more accessible. A lot of the usual advice—like making spreadsheets—feels very neurotypical and just doesn’t work for me.

Ideally, I’d love to find a financial adviser who actually understands ADHD/ASD-related challenges. (Honestly, in an ideal world, I’d have someone who just controls my money and only gives it to me when I have a good enough reason to spend it, but I doubt that exists!)

If anyone has any suggestions or things that have worked for them, I’d really appreciate it!

Thank you 

_Dolly_Rocker_

Morning, 

Just popping by to say hi and that I also struggle with all of the same things you do. 

It's so difficult. 

I'm trying really hard to get my debt paid off - 3rd time I think now - but determined this will be my last. 

Just keep posting on here. 

I really find this site so helpful. 

Best of luck on your journey.

beckstar1975

I am ND and find spreadsheets very helpful so don't paint us all with the same brush!

The only way I can manage is to have multiple bank accounts and put all my spending money in one, once it's gone it's gone. Then put literally everything else on DD/SO from a different account so I know that what's in my account is 'mine' to spend.

This only works if you list all obligations and account for them monthly. I know you said you have ADHD (as do I) but if you do it right you only need to do it once and can then relax - some banks allow you to download statements and will have assigned them to different categories so you can download and analyse like that.

I am terrible for impulsive spending so I just need to not have credit cards or access to credit - as I don't count it as 'money' which is why I'm always in debt!

Another thing that would help (and which I'm trying) is to implement a system for where you keep things and how at home so you don't end up with 5 of the same thing. I am not too bad at it but sadly others in the home aren't and so I just buy replacements all the time - perhaps if you know where things should live (using boxes or trays) so you can easily see what you have and what you want/need.

Fight4yourrights

Hi 👋 
I totally get it (Autism. ADHD) and thank you for being so brave to post it. This is my first post too. I’ve taught myself over the years and totally understand you thinking spreadsheets are boring and neurotypical but they really help me. Excel is brilliant once you set it up for you - don’t use any templates just create it from scratch. Set up direct debits for everything a couple of days after pay day, for everything else e.g annual bills, open a savings account with the same bank and set up a standing order for a twelfth of the estimated outgoing, do the same for debts (or do weekly etc., if you’re paid differently). Set one up for contingencies like household repairs, punctures etc). Basically just go through the last 12 months bank statements and list EVERY transaction. Sift into categories e.g. credit card debts, food shopping, fuel etc 
On Excel list everything exactly as it appears on your bank statement 1st of the month at the top 
date | method (DD, SO, cash | description | money in | money in | money out | running balance 
e.g. 1st Direct Debit Mortgage NatWest £552
23rd | Standing order | birthday & Christmas fund into savings account | £40
leave a lot of rows empty at the end of you’re not familiar with Excel or insert a row in date order every time you take cash out, spend anything not listed etc. for that month.

Enter your salary in the first box under ‘money in’ and anything else that comes in keep it in date order and enter it. If you’re a beginner just pick a box at the bottom of the money in then click the ‘SUM’ symbol which looks like a back to front 3) then click and hold your mouse in the box below and drag it all the way down to the box before where the total is going to appear and let go. Presto! Incoming total 
do the same with next column for outgoings. Next pick somewhere (play around with colours, size etc) as this will be the only box you will need to see in a hurry). Click on the SUM
symbol, then click on the incoming total box, type - (the minus sign) then click on the outgoings total box. This will tell you what’s left but will have included every single expense up to and including the end of the month. If there’s nothing left then make sacrifices e.g. if you’ve allowed for posh coffees, buying lunch out etc enter a zero or remove them until you have a positive balance. Vital expenses paid, anything left great, any emergencies dip into your savings account. Annual expenses… you’re covered it’s in your other account. 

be a credit card tart - find the best transfer deals (3% and the longest zero interest length of time) transfer every card to that one so you can keep track. It will cost e.g. £1000 x 3 / 100 = £30 BUT every payment you make is pure debt you’re paying off and no interest. Before that deal is up make sure you do it again with another provider until the debt is clear. 

Check your spreadsheet every day, make it look good so it works for you. Once you’re rocking it set up a notification with your bank so you get a text telling you when you’ve gone below a certain amount. If you’re no good with money put yourself a cash withdrawal amount line in eg once a week whatever you’ve worked out you can afford. Eventually you won’t even need to look at it - you’ll be looking to see how much you’ve saved for that holiday as once the debt has gone you’ll type over that description to ‘holiday fund etc). 

DON’T forget to press the SAVE button and name your file (looks like a floppy disk). 

Lastly, put reminders in your phone on repeat for annual bills, to remind you to be a credit card tart etc. use the calendars or alarms.

its all about what works for you. What I love is that you can just put in new figures while you’re planning it all and the balance updates automatically so you know where you’re prepared to sacrifice and how much. Stick to it and I promise you’ll get that debt paid off in no time. I’d like to say that I have a savings line but I live hand to mouth but what I do do for anyone with children, is put their child allowance in their own ISA so that you can treat them occasionally AND the Government have a help to save scheme where if you put £50 in a month for them they double it once you’ve hit certain savings goals so ours is to use it for a holiday. 

Sorry I’ve waffled but if it helps one person out of debt- I’ll take that.

ps. Try teaching yourself more about Excel as I love my formulas (my sheets are more advanced) - I do it for everything like dieting etc Syns (money in) what you eat (money out) then you know what treats you can have when you finally finish work, so your chores, pay any ad hoc bills (like the disgusting one I got from TCM at Star City recently because my son’s disabled badges slightly overlapped which I appealed and got the rejection for yesterday), you’ve got the kids to bed and get those 2mins of ‘you’ time before you crash and burn then wake up and start all over again!! 

enthusiasticsaver

I  think as in NT people ND people are all different too and what works for one will not work for another.  Both my son in law and my daughter are ADHD and my son in law has abdicated control of money to my daughter (his wife) who is NT and does not struggle with impulsivity, forward planning etc etc.  My other DD is just aware she can be impulsive so has put things in place to mitigate that like not going shopping with credit cards and using budget planners/spreadsheets.  One thing both use (as do I) is bank accounts like Monzo or Starling where you can hide money in spaces for particular things and thus the balance you see as available is actually lower than what is actually in the account. That might work for you in that on payday you set money aside for bills, debt repayments, groceries, entertainment etc and it helps you to budget. 

thelibrarian11

Hi, I'm autistic and I've been in a cycle of debt most of my adult life. Until the last few years I've struggled with employability and earning enough. I also really struggle with social norms around money, I have no idea how other people afford things, and how they know about savings and mortgages seemingly using psychic powers because I don't feel I was ever taught. I try to define my own success and learned a lot of stuff, but it took me so much longer than others. I do the spreadsheet thing and the Monzo account pots thing too. I live hand to mouth and always have, I have no savings or assets... I can feel really inadequate about it but it's not the worst thing people do in the world, I work hard and I'm a good person. It’s really common for ND people to be vulnerable to debt.