is this sort of bullying

paul2louise

I will try and keep to the facts and it does go on for bit but i would like an unbiased opinion.

i work as a dev chef/technologist for a large food company. My hours of work are fixed but i am obliged to work out of hours occasionly usually for time in lieu. There are 4 of us in my dept my boss and 2 other co workers. Over the christmas period we usually cover 2 in work 2 off work. it was my turn ths year to cover the christmas holiday with my boss. She told me that of the 3 days 27th, 28th and 31st that i could have one day off. She had already chosen 31st so said i could have 27th or 28th. i chose the 27th.

i presumed that would mean that both of us would be in work on 28th but she informed on christmas eve that she was having the 28th as well as she had a lieu day. I had a lieu day and 1/2 day annual leave but was not allowed to use it.

On the 27th i got an email from her at home to hand over to me for the 28th and instructed that i also had to work sunday 30th. i had made enquiries earlier that month about needing to do any additional work required over christmas but nothing had been discussed with me.

I went to work on the 28th, 30th and 31st. On the morning of the 31st my boss phoned me to ask how i had got on on the sunday. I had had some problems which i had done a good job and sorted them and i told her this. i told her what i had done that day and that i was intending to just have a quick clean round ,empty fridges bins etc before the new year. She seemed happy with that.

My bosses boss (BB) came in to see me around lunchtime to see what i was doing. She "told" me that the kitchen was dirty and messy and i needed to give it a spring clean. she wanted me to empty the drawers and cupboards and give them a clean. i asked if i could wait until everyone was back so that we could sort through the stuff together. She said she wanted me to make a start.

when i had retuned from lunch i had finished washing up and general tidying so i decided to tidy out my own cupboard and drawers first and do some filing. BB came to see me at 3.30pm (1 hour before finish) to see how i was getting on. I explained what i had been doing but she wasnt happy she still insisted on me emptying the general kitchen cupboards and drawers to clean.

so i ask the question

if my boss is happy to leave me for 3 days and thinks i can keep busy why is BB interferring and looking for jobs that we ALL should be doing together. I know BB will complain about me to my boss tommorrow as i have challenged her and i will get a verbal warning.

i have had leave refused a few weeks ago as we "were too busy" to allow me to half a day for a medical appointment.

Why when most of the other depts on 31st going early as good will was i given non urgent cleaning jobs.

am i taking things too personally or is there any possibility that BB is on a power trip as she is new to the job.

also if try to talk to my boss after i have had my warning she will probably try and make me feel unreasonable and take the side of BB her new boss .

I feel sick to the stomach. I am going to have 3 days on the sick so that i can sort out what i do next. I will try and contact citizens advice and maybe ACAS. hs anyone else got a suggestion

i fully intend to hand my notice in on monday as i dont see how it will settle amicably. I dont feel i can go back to work with my head down waiting for my telling off when i havent done anything wrong.

thanks for reading

Louise

hollydays

Re the days worked-sometimes worklife is not always fair. It sounds like you made an assumption the two of you would be working,but not that it was expressly stated,but you can only do the work of one person. Getting a warning is no big deal.Challenging someone is one thing if its done politely,and you cant be given a warning for that.

Maybe the big boss was annoyed at your lazy manager,but was directing it at you .You need to learn to be more assertive in future.

I would raise with them that its not reasonable to be expected to work at such short notice.,and that was what you were upset about ,if you were rude,you need to apologise.(perhaps your Manager should get a warning for sneakily changing her days off,dont say that though)

I would not have agreed to work the day requested by email ( cowardly to do it this way too,you should have been asked,not told).What rules are there in place about advance arrangement of rotas?
If a boss asks you to make a start cleaning on your own,I dont see the problem with that,at your own pace,but maybe she thought you were being defiant or lazy also by cleaning out your own cupboard ,which wound her up doubly.I think you are getting worked up over a minor thing.No need to worry x

kammyk

I think the BB (boss's boss) is most probably on a powertrip. I really cant see any reason why you want to make it formal yet, as you dont have any strong evidence. The boss's just seem to misserable f#!~s as most of them are!

How long have you been working at this place? Have you had any other problems up untill now?

Good Luck.

Oldernotwiser

I wouldn't call any of this bullying and I would think that taking sick days and then giving in your notice the worse possible action. By going sick when you're not you put yourself in the wrong and enable tales to be told behind your back. Go in and sort it out; if you feel you've been treated unfairly you can give your notice in later. Life isn't always fair but I think you're overreacting to this.

paul2louise

thanks for your replies. i have had a few problems with BB and it seems whenmy boss isnt there. In her first week she turned the air conditioning off in the kitchen and i asked her if i could have it on low. i got spoken to about that.

As for being more assertive i think that is my problem as i have tried to challenge BB and she doesnt like it. My boss is too soft and there have been several times in the past where she pacifies me and hopes for an easy life.

I get the feeling that when my boss is off we are left to fend off attacks and i seem to encounter this quite a lot. If i thought that my boss was strong enough to deal with BB then i would talk to her but i think she will want to keep her own head down and not make life hard for herself.

I have been in the job for over 4 years i am good at my job and here is never a question about the quality of my work. I just think that people like BB like to have people to boss about.

i dont think i can get it resolved as i think the working environment will have this tension now. so i have resolved myself that a new job is m y only answer. i just want to get a bit of advice as to how much to tell them.

as for having a couple of days on the sick it is not unrealistic having worked and tried to party over christmas that i might be a bt run down as flu and colds are rife. My attendance is near perfect with only 2 days due to whiplash injuries a couple of months ago. That was what the 1/2 day appointment was about that i had refused.

My local CAB office is open tommorrow so i might drop in

Thanks

Oldernotwiser

Being assertive doesn't usually involve "challenging" the orders of someone several grades up the management ladder. Leaving out the morality of taking sick leave when you're not ill, don't you think that it'll look suspicious to go off sick immediately after having problems at work. You'll need a good reference if you're going for another job and there is such a thing as cutting off your nose to spite your face!

paul2louise

i am going off sick having had a busy working christmas and i a sick with the thought going in work, and how can they know that is why i am off. maybe my new years resolution is to stop being a martyr.

As for challenging/assertive asking to wait until everyone is back to do the work together. ididnt say i wouldnt do it i just asked to wait until a better time

either way i am fed up with them and i want a new job

Oldernotwiser

You're obviously free to do whatever you want. I was just suggesting that when you're going to be applying for a new job and need a good reference it's not the best time to be throwing suspicious sickies and having rows with management. I'm sorry I didn't agree with your point of view, but that's advice for you - not always what you want to hear!

Iamthesmartestmanalive

Frankly you come across as bitter and being a pain

Firstly re the days off, you didnt ask for the extra ones so you cant moan that someone else who did got them

Had you asked you might have got them

As for the overtime, you state this is normal so again no issue

As for the BB coming in, I would imagine the set up recognises her power and it is appropiate for her to give you orders and for you to follow them, you cant then argue when you ignore them

You have no case and no claim for depression and I hope if you do try and scam them they catch you and dismiss you

Theres a difference between discrimination and not liking your job/colleagues and you are well and truly in the latter

hollydays

I get the feeling you dont fully grasp the world of work as others see it,that is-people tell you to do things-you have to do it,within reason.I dont really understand why you are taking this stance and I agree you will need a good reference. If you are unhappy in a job-dont burn your bridges-go back to work and work until you find another job. When you leave tell them how wonderful it was to work for them.If you are a good worker it will be their loss.You need to have a mature attitude about all this.Good luck.

paul2louise

Iamthesmartestmanalive wrote: »

Frankly you come across as bitter and being a pain

Firstly re the days off, you didnt ask for the extra ones so you cant moan that someone else who did got them

Had you asked you might have got them

As for the overtime, you state this is normal so again no issue

As for the BB coming in, I would imagine the set up recognises her power and it is appropiate for her to give you orders and for you to follow them, you cant then argue when you ignore them

You have no case and no claim for depression and I hope if you do try and scam them they catch you and dismiss you

Theres a difference between discrimination and not liking your job/colleagues and you are well and truly in the latter

i am not bitter and not a pain.
i want dignity and respect
so if you cant give me any advice then dont bother

read this
Pls be nice to all MoneySavers. There's no such thing as a stupid question, and even if you disagree courtesy helps.