The only way is up - but I need to keep going in the right direction!

poppytattoo

Okay, time for a new debt-free diary. 

I first started one seven years ago when I realised how in debt I was after years of silly decisions, some tricky circumstances, slipping back into bad habits, and burying my head in the sand. Back then, at its worst, my debt was £39,220.58. 

I'm now on £6977.55, split across two credit cards. So much better than I was in terms of outstanding debt, and I'm earning more now, but I also now have much more responsibility - one child at nursery, another on the way this summer (which we are thrilled about, but has happened earlier than we expected - this year was meant to be our year of saving up!), bigger mortgage & utilities payments etc. 

Paying down that debt has taken a bit of a back seat as I'm currently focusing on saving up enough to help cover the bills whilst I'm on maternity leave from July. I work for a small company that hasn't had someone go on mat leave before, so no enhanced mat pay, and SMP won't touch the sides. 

I've been struggling with this pregnancy quite a bit. Barely keeping any food down, exhausted but not sleeping, and to be honest quite anxious about whether baby will get here safely and then making things work when number two arrives.

I know myself well enough to know that when I'm feeling low, or helpless, or overwhelmed, I have an instinct to "make myself feel better" by throwing money I don't have at the problem. I am determined to avoid that this time. I don't want to get more into debt and I want to put away as much money as I can for maternity leave.

So, I'm here again to try and keep myself accountable and to hopefully remind myself of what really matters - not "a little treat" to cheer myself up, but keeping my money stable for the two little ones and our future. 

Here's to staying on track! 

V3cash

wow that’s really inspirational, such a huge achievement and it sounds like you are really reflective and aware of your triggers to overspending.

when I had my daughter I had to return to work when she was 4 months old.
I feel she hasn’t suffered for it as her dad looked after her 1 day at weekend and nursery the other day.
are your credit cards 0%?

Sarahwithlove

Congrats on the new baby on the way. Whilst timing might not be ideal it will be worth it in the end. Hopefully you find ways to plug the gap whilst on Mat leave. Have you got anything you could sell? 

poppytattoo

Hi V3cash & Sarahwithlove - thank you both for commenting! 

One card is 0% but coming up to the end of the 0% period, the other one isn't - I think I need to look at putting both into one 0% balance card. 

Definitely need to have a think about how long to take off on maternity leave. Was lucky enough to have 11 months with my first but it was much easier to save then as bills didn't come to as much & we'd been saving before getting pregnant that time. But we've just moved house now so savings have pretty much gone & I don't think I'll manage a longer mat leave this time around. I'm hoping to stretch it as long as possible so it doesn't feel too unfair between the two of them, especially if I can hoard some annual leave beforehand and then tack that on to the end. 

On selling things - not really, I'm afraid we have had a massive clearout just before moving in November so got rid of anything unnecessary then! But on my last mat leave I did sell a lot of baby clothes etc and used the funds from that to cover things like baby classes, buying up a size (second hand of course!) and this will be our last baby so can definitely be getting rid of stuff as baby outgrows it! 

poppytattoo

Me again - it's Wednesday and I have managed to avoid any spending that isn't related to travelling to work (car park £5 a day, topped up petrol yesterday for £15). It took me over two hours to get in this morning! Luckily I only work on-site two days a week and can work from home the rest of the time. 

I used to get the train, which costs about £17 return, but the pregnancy sickness has made that impossible. Last few times I tried it I was violently ill on and off the train! At least in the car I can stop when I need to be sick. I do feel bad about the environmental impact of my journey, but I also felt bad chucking into a carrier bag for an hour on the train... 

I do need to spend a bit of money over the next few days to get a little gift for my best friend's daughter who turns 1 this weekend. 

My spending money is greatly reduced this month after paying my Self Assessment tax bill last week - I thought I had worked out how much I would owe and put money aside with each invoice to save for HMRC, but in the end it came to £600+ more than I was expecting - turns out I hadn't factored in NI and student loans. Hey ho, lesson learned! I pulled some from savings and the rest came out of spends. I was determined to still put away £500 for maternity leave savings this month and have done, as would rather take the hit on "fun money". 

In a little bit of good news, I had a message from Student Loan Company this week to say that I am due a refund because I paid too much when on my last mat leave. Normally I'd have considered leaving it as an overpayment towards Student Loans, but every penny counts at the moment towards that maternity leave fund, so I've requested they send it to me. No idea how much it'll be as I can't work out how to find out. But that will be a nice surprise when it comes, even if it's only a tenner! Anyone got any tips to get that info from them?

Hope everyone else is having a good week - halfway to the weekend... 

Debtfree2026

Hi! Congratulations! 

Just wanted to jump on re the student loan thing! I got an email telling me I was due a refund…I thought it was a scam email to be honest so logged on to my student loan account independently, not following any links from the email!

Saw that my bank details were completely out of date and had to call them to change them. Whilst on the phone the lady asked if I was intending to request the refund…I said I wasn’t sure but yes, that’s what prompted me to log on in the first place. She asked if I wanted to know the amount and I said sure…she went through it all and it’s £1,230! So I have done the request form. I know it gets added to the total but it will clear the last of one credit card and my littlewoods account! 

So worth calling them perhaps? 

poppytattoo

Hiya Debtfree2026! 

Thank you for this advice - when I logged on I actually noticed that my annual SLC statements are missing from my account since 2020 so I do need to ring them anyway to see what's going on there, and hopefully they'll be able to tell me how much to expect. 

Fantastic that you had a refund of £1,230 and sounds like you put it to good use too - amazing! 

poppytattoo

I've got a consultation at the hospital today to do with baby no.2 that is freaking me out a bit - I know it's better to have them be over concerned and keeping an eye on things than not, and midwives have reassured me it's a standard/common situation but it's about some high-risk factors due to previous birth. 

What I am NOT going to do today is have the appointment then go to the shops and spend a load of money on treats or buy myself lunch or something - I can come home and have some of the leftover chocolate from Christmas in the cupboard if I feel I really need something. 

Debtfree2026

Ah Poppy - I hope all goes well at the consultation.  I was consultant led for both my pregnancies, but more so with my second and I remember feeling a mixture of reassurance but apprehension.  And I'm sorry - leftover chocolate?! Gosh, I really fancied some last night and we are long out of our Christmas chocs!  Ironically plenty of Halloween candy left but that doesn't hit the spot!

poppytattoo

Right - it's been a while! Again! What a whirlwind few months. 

Credit card spending has slipped out of control a bit with a mixture of furnishing the new house (just getting basics that "will do" for a few years rather than aesthetic stuff I wanted, and second hand finds where I can), silly food shops (let myself get carried away by pregnancy sickness and aversions so a lot of random little shops of food I thought I might be able to keep down etc) but the absolute worst of all was my little boy was in an accident a couple of months ago. He is fine now although still recovering, but our finances took a hit as we were having to eat from the hospital Subway/Costa and my husband missed a lot of work that he won't get paid for. Luckily my employer was fab and I managed to work from hospital/home a bit so no loss of earnings for me. 

I also had some credit cards that were set to come to the end of a 0% period this year - right after my pay drops on maternity leave. So I've taken out a M&S loan to consolidate and at least I know how much I'll be paying towards it every month. 

It's frustrating but the priority needs to just be getting through those initial months on maternity leave able to pay the bills, stretching the leave a little bit with annual leave accrued, then going back to work - and then the focus will be ploughing more money into paying it off. 

We are where we are and I can't go back in time and change it - need to keep reminding myself that the debt situation is nowhere near as bad as it was a few years ago, and I can keep moving in the right direction, it's just going to be a bit slower than I'd hoped. I hope I can give myself that grace whilst also holding myself to account.