High interest mortgage

EssexHebridean

I'm sorry to hear about your dog - it really is all happening at once for you isn't it, and this is a lot to deal with. 

I think you need to pop that call in to the mortgage company as a priority - it is better that they have some warning that the payment will not go through than they try to take it and it bounces - and trust me, they will NOT want to repossess, so they will be keen to help you. I suspect just making that call will actually take a weight off your mind too - as the fear of the unknown is awful, and we always think things will be worse that they actually are!

The groceries is an easy win - I posted earlier in the thread with some suggestions there and Matt has also given input there. you can start turning that particularly ship around today too - which is positive! 

Good work on the benefits - and it is to your credit that you didn't want to claim when you felt there was no need to, but it will probably be god for your daughter to feel that she has some financial independence too won't it! This is about HER entitlement to help too remember - so think about things from that way rather than feeling bad about claiming. 

EssexHebridean

Just make sure it goes to a legitimate jeweller if that is the case Marie - and ensure that you get a receipt for it. As a final safeguard take several photos of the watch itself sitting on the receipt - it's massively unlikely that you will run into any problems but that at least gives you some reassurance that you have proof it was left with them! 

Are there any second hand designer clothing exchange type shops near you that might take the bags? 

Unless your engagement ring isn't a piece you are very attached to, I'd hold off on selling that right now - it's quite an extreme step for dealing with a short-term cash flow issue, which is all this is, right now. 

Grumpelstiltskin

Good that your daughter is claiming benefits now, even disabled millionaires claim PIP as it is not means tested.

MattMattMattUK

MarieQG said:

I have emailed a few local second hand jewlers. I want to sell my Rolex and engagement ring. The husband isn’t happy about the ring but I need peace of mind.

Sell the Rolex, you will get good money for it, do not sell your engagement ring. You will get back a small fraction of what was paid for the engagement ring and I would be almost certain that you will regret selling it in the long run. Sell other stuff if needed, VT both cars and get something small and cheap, but I would really advise you against selling your engagement ring. 

ManyWays

You mentioned 50k back from HMRC in April. What is this for and is it 100% definite, because HMRC usually pay refunds promptly. If you get that 50k, you should immediately clear the school debt (if you have no grounds to dispute it) and any mortgage arrears. Putting 10k aside as an emergency fund for the next bad month would be a good move. 

Your immediate aim is to get the debt to the school down to under 5k - in that case they cannot make you bankrupt. And to minimise mortgage arrears. 

Obviously you dont pay anything the non priority debts, Selling handbags etc may help. VTing that car will also reduce insurance and other running costs. But if you cant pay the mortgage this month it is better to tell Pepper than just not pay it. 

If the 50k doesnt turn up and business is still bad in a few months time, that is the time to think about selling. 

EssexHebridean

Your husband is right about the house - you honestly don't need to think about anything that big at this stage. 

Dealing with financial stuff like this - it's a "one step at a time" issue - take a breath, be methodical.

As for your thinking of ending your life - it's never an answer, no matter how much we think it is. And it never makes life better for those left behind either, again, no matter how much we might feel it will - I absolutely promise you that is the case. 

Get yourself a GP appointment urgently as you've said. 

As for that "one step" above - make the next one that call to the mortgage company. I know it feels huge, but it's honestly best to talk to them. Think of it as your very own "One giant leap...for Marie!" 

Working_Mum

Hello MarieQG,
I didn't want to just read and run.

I wanted to share an awful situation which impacted me last year. I run an office services company and my receptionist took her own life last year. Just like that and out of the blue. She was 28. The impact of this has been huge on her family and her friends, colleagues and me (her employer of 5 years) - a rolling tidal wave of sadness which hits all of the time. We are all devastated. Please understand - when you are feeling low - you just have to get through one more minute, hour and then day and things do get better. Look at the progress you've made in the last few days.

There is hope in your situation - you are due a refund from HMRC in April - that's three mortgage payments away. If your credit rating is already taken a knock with recent events then I'd be tempted to VT anything I can and live a super frugal life until the HMRC monies come in.

Liaise with Pepper and explain the sitch - I feel sure they'll support you guys and you can then work a plan to get things back up straight within a period of time when things pick up work wise.

I'd stare the school down and write to them telling them they'll get their money when the HMRC pay you - the wheels of the law churn slowly so nothing will happen in the next few months - I would also hazard a guess that any judge would tell the school to wait given the promises you've made.

When I was feeling overwhelmed I only dealt in writing with the people I owed money to - credit card companies, energy company, car loan people. It meant I could keep track of what I'd said and not be railroaded into saying things or making promises I wasn't able to keep.

Your life is in a bit if turmoil right now but you have a lot of things in your corner. Don't sell your engagement ring - do everything else in your power first - batch cooking, selling your Rolex and posh bags, using less water, downgrade your coffee - try and have fun whilst doing it and then when things turn the corner then you'll be able to use the last few hard weeks as a launch pad to ensure you're not in this situation again.

Sending big hugs

((WM))

EssexHebridean

That is a WONDERFUL post from @Working_Mum - beautifully put! 

girlatplay

Marie,

Please understand that what you are currently going through is temporary. It's hard, stressful, upsetting and you can't see a clear way out at the moment but you will get through it and you will come out the other side in a much better place in all aspects of your life.

What you talked about doing earlier would be permanent. Your family and friends would be devastated. Your children would NEVER get over it. Please, please, please don't consider that as a way out. No matter how tough things are that is not the answer. I'm glad you've contacted your GP and I hope you can get some support with your thoughts really quickly. Keep talking to people, anyone, just keep talking.

Sell the watch, sell the bags. Don't sell your engagement ring.

You've had some great advice on the thread already. Keep coming back and keep posting.

Gap

3Commando

Hi MarieQG,
I’ve been here a long time and rarely post….

I’d encourage you to ring Pepper. They will move you to 6 months interest only to assist, should you ask.  This is not recorded on credit files in a detrimental way. It may alleviate the immediate issue at hand.
Best Wishes