Stopping the backsliding… a family of four no longer living beyond their means

Bluegreen143

The meetings are working well @Sarahwithlove. They aren’t just money meetings now - we also review our calendar and discuss anything needing done. So helpful. 

We had our weekly meeting tonight actually and reviewed our calendar and spending plan as well as last week’s actions, which were mainly done. Here are the notes I took today:

Decisions

1. Red gave me his birthday outing ideas for the Friday (archery, mini golf, 2 person escape room, B&Q, casino) - discussed separately maybe inviting his best friend’s family round on Sat. He’s left it up to me to make the final activity selection. 

2. ⁠MIL birthday - planned to get to hers for 2pm, do cake there, beach for 3.30, sit in chippy at 5. 

3. Discussed that fact that Monkey has around £1,200 in savings from being a baby (mainly what he was left by my nana). I found out this week we can’t withdraw it until he’s 18 so I began the process of moving to a better junior ISA with a higher interest rate. We’ve agreed to set one up for Bambi and pay in £10p/m until she has the same amount, but not to save any further money in either kids’ name as we don’t want them having access to too much at age 18. I’d rather save in our names to help them as students or with weddings etc than have it in their name to blow!

Actions for BG

* Plan & book Red’s birthday activity(ies)

* ⁠Get Monkey to make his uncle’s birthday card

* ⁠Finish transferring kids’ account & check balance - set up savings for Bambi to catch her up  

* ⁠Get kids’ passport pics 

* ⁠Book dentist appointments for self & kids 

Actions for Red 

* Pick up cake for MIL

* ⁠Book car for work w/c Mon 17th Feb

* ⁠Book electrical check for house (if under £200, otherwise bring back to discuss)

* ⁠Book travel insurance 

* ⁠Register with dentist

Bluegreen143

Nice lazy start to the weekend this morning as we had a lie in. 

I’m just getting ready now for my day out today - going to another city for a matinee ballet performance, food and drinks with my mum and sister (on the train). Red is dropping me at the train station, I’ll get on and 20 minutes later my mum and sister will get on at the stop closest to my sister’s house. The restaurant is Japanese so actually fairly slimming friendly, though I’m not going to count up my syns today as I’ll definitely go over due to drinking 😆.

Did I mention on here I lost 1.5lb this week, so am at 9lb altogether on SW (and I had lost a few lb before I started too, so am nearly 1.5st under my heaviest weight). Considering I had two weeks off at Christmas, and about two weeks of then losing the Christmas weight, I’ve only had about five weeks actually doing the plan so I’m really pleased with 9lb off to date and feeling positive that the membership was money well spent. Another 26lb to go though! 

Made a gorgeous beef stew with air fryer roast potatoes last night, bulked out with plenty veg so fekt both MSE and healthy. I’ve a portion left so that will do lunch, probably tomorrow but maybe Monday.

Today the kids are having (shop bought) chicken burgers & oven chips as a rare treat while I’m out, as Red wanted steak. So not an MSE day for food. I bought the more expensive chicken burgers made of whole chicken breast rather than reformed mush, which is money well spent IMO as I’d rather the kids were eating the better quality meat (I do the same with chicken nuggets, which is why I almost never buy them as the whole breast nuggets are not a cheap treat!).

I had planned chicken pasta tomorrow but had forgotten we’re going to the seaside for the afternoon with MIL (for her birthday) and getting a chippy, so that’s a meal we can have on Monday or Tuesday instead. So a weekend off cooking for me 😅.

beanielou

Enjoy the ballet.

KajiKita

Well done on the weight loss 👏 😊

I’m sorry to hear about the alcoholism within the extended family. But well done for setting your boundaries and making some decisions about this upfront. 

You sound really upbeat and positive at the moment, which is impressive for this time of year. Enjoy your weekend off cooking and the trip to the seaside 😊

KK

Bluegreen143

Hello all! Been a busy weekend - enjoyed my day out on Saturday and going to the beach with MIL on Sunday. My mum kindly paid for dinner on Sat so I ended up just paying £20 for the train. 

Red and I have decided to start sending the kids with a packed lunch some of the time. This may slightly impact the grocery budget - I know it seems a not very MSE move, as the school lunches are free at their stages, but I’m really fed up of the quality and nutrition available. In a two week rotation, my kids tend to have chicken burgers twice, pizza twice, beef burgers twice and hot dogs once. And then sandwiches or fish fingers or pasta the other days. There are other choices (roast dinner/paella/curry), but none of them look much healthier, and my kids won’t eat those.

I hope not to add too much to the grocery budget but I know I can provide so much better quality and variety of food to my kids and the amount of beige they eat at school just doesn’t sit right with me. There is soup provided with each meal, but Bambi won’t eat that either, so in general she is getting no vegetables with her lunch. At the end of the day our money is there to live in line with our values, which includes nutritious food for our kids. 

That said, I’m not going to commit that we won’t use school meals at all, but I’ll try to keep them for days when we are especially busy. 

I’m going to buy food flasks for the kids as both have expressed that they’d prefer hot food sent in at least some of the time, and a mum friend was explaining to me today the various things she batches and freezes for her child’s food flask - her system sounds great. 

Thinking of lunch options like:

COLD
Obviously sandwiches, or wraps with hummus & carrot or cold chicken and salad.

Tuna or pesto pasta (homemade pesto as needs to be nut free) 

Cold chicken drumsticks or wings

Leftover cold HM pizza or (good quality/homemade) chicken nuggets 

HOT
Tomato pasta or mac & cheese 

Chicken fajita rice 

Any leftovers they like or things like chilli would be good

Obviously soup is an option, and they do like soup, but would probably be too messy. 

And I can send a tub of fruit & crunchy veg to accompany whatever they have. 

Would love to hear any other suggestions for lunch ideas. (Could be useful for mixing up my own lunches too!). 

Time2count

My son took soup sometimes aged 7-9ish with a homemade roll, it wasn't messy, I just added a damp flannel in a sandwich bag so he could wipe his face after!
He was quite a picky eater for cold foods so often had things like homemade fruit scones, crackers and cheese, I've even sent him in with porridge on occasion as at that age sandwich/ similar just didn't get eaten! 
It doesn't have to cost loads though, you could just make slightly larger portions when cooking the main meal and freeze the additional bit to pop in their lunch a few days later. Your children are much more adventurous then mine food wise. You could get them to look through a few picnic recipes and pick a few things they'd like in their lunch boxes, try here https://www.bbc.co.uk/food/collections/kids_packed_lunch_ideas

Just beware if your school has the lunchbox police. I was taken to task a few times 'he shouldn't have a cake in there' despite this being a homemade fruit muffin and the school dinners having cake as a pudding every day!

QueenJess

I also switched to pack lunches this year due to dubious quality of school food, but this is also the first year we have to pay so I reckon it’s far cheaper for us to do pack lunches.

I switch between hot food and sandwiches, but try to not make it too hard and use whatever I have around/leftovers most the time. DS takes soups, sandwiches, fruit, cheese and crackers, popcorn, various pastas (mac and cheese, tomato pasta, spag Bol or meatballs) and sometimes, hm cakes/biscuits/treats and sometimes I send him in with a hot dessert and custard for afters! Those thermos flasks are fab.

FootyFanDan

We are also considering switching to packed lunches, we have added complication of little one been a bit picky with her food but also coeliac and although school in the past have been very aware and very accommodating, we are starting to notice the standards slipping. I think we will probably switch between pasta which she's a massive fan of and sandwiches maybe in the warmer months.

Bluegreen143

Thanks for the thoughts and helpful ideas! 

We still have 1.5 years of free lunches for Monkey and 4.5 for Bambi, but honestly the quality and nutrition is now not great at all. I had an epiphany that just because something is free doesn’t mean you have to take it! However the poor standards makes me really angry because of course many families can’t afford to make the choice and are dependent on free meals. 

fionaandphil

This takes me back, all the talk of packed lunches and the packed lunch police!  Ours were good quality for the first 2 years and then they changed catering manager and it wasn't great, we did have the option of sandwiches at lunch though so he had that most of the week and then whatever fishy Friday thing they had.  Good luck finding different options, various allergies and the the pl police meant that we resorted to wraps, yoghurt and a piece of fruit.  Has pretty much stayed the same ever since and DS is a teen now