Retirement - Actual vs Expectation

captain_jep

Haha - “should”! I have done good work getting as much as possible paid from joint accounts. But my OH still insists on paying large amounts on her credit card… 

Albermarle

Bostonerimus1 said:

Albermarle said:

Bostonerimus1 said:

Albermarle said:

Sarahspangles said:

Albermarle said:

Although I am money conscious, I have no budgeting software tools or spreadsheets. My view is I did not retire to have to work on such things. So back of a fag packet is enough for me ( exaggerating slightly ).
I think it comes from the fact that I had a commercial negotiating job, that meant deals had to be sometimes done over the dinner table with no laptop in sight. Or in the car park after driving back from lunch. So I feel comfortable holding a lot of it in my head, especially as my mental arithmetic and memory is pretty good. 
Plus I probably have more than I need, which reduces the need to budget in detail.
Each to their own !

I’m just naturally analytical, so it’s satisfying to me in the way cleaning my car is to OH!

When I was working I was also known to be analytical, but more in the way of analysing market/customer/competitor situations in a less emotional way than some others. 
It is the minutiae of budgeting and spreadsheets I don't like ! 

You can do a budget at a very high level by just looking at how much you spend each month without breaking it down much further. This will give you some numbers to plug into your savings and retirement goals. What you miss out on with this approach is seeing where you spend your money and taking steps to control your spending. Some of the biggest savings can be made on food if you tend to eat out or order take aways a lot. IMO personal finances and cooking should be mandatory in schools to some level just like maths and English.

Of course I have a high level budget, and have a good idea of what we are spending at the supermarket, cars, holidays  etc.
But it is all average monthly spends, checked every few months or so, rather than in detail.
Also to do it in detail you need your partner ( if you have one) to be also happy to supply detail about personal spending etc  which many would not be happy with. 

When you are married finances and retirement planning can be far more complicated than for someone who's single. The legal and financial consequences of a marriage contract can lead to some tricky situations if both spouses aren't honest and forthcoming. I can understand the inclination to keep some spending to yourself, but when it comes to your joint finances and planning for retirement the inclination should be to sharing. We'll gladly reveal all in the bedroom and married couples should take the same attitude to their finances.

We do share all major finance issues, but if I was to start quizzing her on how much the hairdressers cost, or how much she spent on birthday presents for family etc. to put in a spreadsheet, then it would only stir up trouble. Or adverse comments about my wine bill.
So one has to be pragmatic.....

sgx2000

So one has to be pragmatic.....

Hear hear......

Moonwolf

Albermarle said:

We do share all major finance issues, but if I was to start quizzing her on how much the hairdressers cost, or how much she spent on birthday presents for family etc. to put in a spreadsheet, then it would only stir up trouble. Or adverse comments about my wine bill.
So one has to be pragmatic.....

Absolutely.  We have had a joint account since we got together.  Part of the point is that we pay enough into that to cover all the basics, energy, insurance, council tax, the big shop TV licence and so on.  What we have left is private (-ish).  It means have never fallen out over money. 

A tiny bit less private with pension planning as we have to make sure we are both provided for in various scenarios.

Sarahspangles

Pat38493 said:

Yes - my partner is reluctant to provide me all the details of her monthly spending so at the moment I just assume that she spends her whole DB pension.  This is a conservative assumption as she has mentioned that she does often have a bit to put aside and some things will go away in due course.  I suspect the reason she doesn't give me the info is more because she can't be bothered to get it and go through it all rather than for privacy reasons or whatever.

Our setup is that OH gives details of anything that is ‘joint’ but the remaining balance on his credit card is simply categorised as ‘OH Personal’. I break my personal spending down a bit further but that’s for my own reference.

He is open about his capital savings and I set up a spreadsheet for him at the point there was too much information to hold in his head. Also, if something happens to one of us then this (along with my spreadsheet) will be useful to the other, or to our executors. After dealing with three estates in three years we’re a bit more organised ourselves!