Money Moral Dilemma: My daughter's selling clothes I got her - should she have offered them to me?

MSE_Kelvin

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

 Last year, I bought my daughter some new clothes to help her out as she's been struggling with money. I recently saw that she's put them up for sale on a popular buying and selling app. We wear the same size and I would have loved them. Should she have asked me if I wanted them before trying to sell them, or at least offered me a share of what she gets for them?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't answer Money Moral Dilemma questions as contributions are emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be a point of debate and discussed at face value. Remember that behind each dilemma there is a real person so, as the forum rules say, please keep it kind and keep it clean.

If you haven’t already, join the forum to reply.
Got a Money Moral Dilemma of your own? Suggest an MMD.
View past Money Moral Dilemmas.

coffee_cake

No, they are hers to do with what she wishes.

tacpot12

You know your daughter best, and hence whether there was always the potential for her to sell these clothes. 

It would be best to let her know gently that you would have liked first refusal on them as you felt they would suit you, but I think you have to let her keep all of the money that she has raised/raises.

Presumably she needs the money and you don't seem to have made it clear that you would be offended if she sold the clothes quickly. A gift is a gift. It is better to give without reservation that to tie up the gift will all sorts of expectations. I assume that if she had worn them for quite a while and then sold them on, you would be far less bothered. 

You could always buy them from the site where she has them advertised. She might be embarrassed when she realises who has bought them, so you might have to check with her first that she is okay if you bid on them.

km1500

No, they are her clothes

HotDog2020

It must be that Money is very tight to renegade on a gift.

the_lunatic_is_in_my_head

Children are only a reflection of their parents.

Still not sure these are real questions. 

Florafauna

Nope, they were a gift to her and hers to do what she wants with

Marcon

Instead of asking for a straw poll here, why not just offer to buy them at the prices she's listed them for (obviously she needs to take them off the site first!).

k_k_k_katy

No.  The definition of 'give' is 'freely transfer the possession of (something) to (someone).'   You haven't any rights to something you have given away,

superquark

You mention yourself that you bought the clothes for her because you knew she was struggling financially.  I'm not sure why you're now surprised that money is more important to her than clothes, given her situation.

In any case, you have no claim on them.  They were a gift, and she can do with them as she pleases. Let it go.

Dickie66uk

MSE_Kelvin said:

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

 Last year, I bought my daughter some new clothes to help her out as she's been struggling with money. I recently saw that she's put them up for sale on a popular buying and selling app. We wear the same size and I would have loved them. Should she have asked me if I wanted them before trying to sell them, or at least offered me a share of what she gets for them?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't answer Money Moral Dilemma questions as contributions are emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be a point of debate and discussed at face value. Remember that behind each dilemma there is a real person so, as the forum rules say, please keep it kind and keep it clean.

If you haven’t already, join the forum to reply.
Got a Money Moral Dilemma of your own? Suggest an MMD.
View past Money Moral Dilemmas.

Regardless that you brought them, they are her clothes to sell.  As said previously, maybe she’s struggling and needs money again?  May be she’s selling them because she didn't like them?
If you don't like that she sold the clothes you brought, learn from it and do not buy any more.
Not sure why you would want to wear your daughters clothes Kelvin, age appropriate etc, but thats your call.