Debt letters for non-resident family member

Hello,

My mother is getting letters from various debt collectors at her home addressed to my nephew.

The debts have nothing to do with her, they are all my nephew's from a time when he lived on his own at a different address.

He is not resident at my mother's address. 

How do I deal with this on behalf of my mother? 

 My nephew has mental health issues so getting him to deal with this is nigh on impossible. We don't want to throw him under the bus but we want the letters to my months address to cease.

Any advice is appreciated.


Comments

  • Hello,

    My mother is getting letters from various debt collectors at her home addressed to my nephew.

    The debts have nothing to do with her, they are all my nephew's from a time when he lived on his own at a different address.

    He is not resident at my mother's address. 

    How do I deal with this on behalf of my mother? 

     My nephew has mental health issues so getting him to deal with this is nigh on impossible. We don't want to throw him under the bus but we want the letters to my months address to cease.

    Any advice is appreciated.
    Is he in some way registered at your mother's address (electoral roll), has he been in the past, or has he given them that address as his address? Your mother can send them back RTS labelled "not known at this address", but they may well keep sending them and you cannot do anything to that will guarantee they will stop, short of your nephew taking responsibility and/or clearing the debt.
  • Richard1212
    Richard1212 Posts: 491
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    edited 4 November 2023 at 11:29PM
    You don't say whether you are in close touch with your nephew. If you are, you may consider talking to him and saying that the current situation is causing your mother great distress, that it's not fair, and ask him to write to whoever owns the debts in question telling them where he now lives and that your Mum has nothing to do with any of it and that it's all making her ill----and for them to stop writing to her.

    If that's not an option, I would think more about my Mum than the previous irresponsibility of your nephew or his mental state ; and I would write myself to each separate debt collector who writes to your Mum and tell them that they are hounding an elderly lady who knows nothing of the debts and provide the nephew's current address ( unless he is seen as seriously in danger of suicide and has serious mental issues that make him unfit for work---in which case tell them that neither you nor your Mum has any idea where he lives now). Tell them that unless they stop hounding an elderly lady who knows nothing of the debts or nephew's whereabouts, you will complain to your Mum's MP and the Financial Ombudsman Service. And if they continue to pester, then by all means do one or both of those two options. Try and get the name /account of the company who are employing the debt collectors and copy your letters to them too). Good luck.
  • fatbelly
    fatbelly Posts: 20,241
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    Hello,

    My mother is getting letters from various debt collectors at her home addressed to my nephew.

    The debts have nothing to do with her, they are all my nephew's from a time when he lived on his own at a different address.

    He is not resident at my mother's address. 

    How do I deal with this on behalf of my mother? 

     My nephew has mental health issues so getting him to deal with this is nigh on impossible. We don't want to throw him under the bus but we want the letters to my months address to cease.

    Any advice is appreciated.


    Advice to mum:

    1. Stop opening letters addressed to him
    2. Write on the envelope 'not at this address'
    3. Circle return address if there is one. If not, not your problem.
    4. Write 'return to sender'
    5. Put in nearest post box.

    Anything else will only encourage them
  • Rob5342
    Rob5342 Posts: 1,363
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    edited 5 November 2023 at 7:12AM
    Why is she opening his letters? If she just does what Fatbelly says then she wouldn't even know what they were.
  • Rob5342 said:
    Why is she opening his letters? If she just does what Fatbelly says then she wouldn't even know what they were.
    Where have I said that she opens the letters?

    It's quite easy to Google a return address to see who has sent the letter.

    It's her grandson, he may not live there but he does call around from time to time.
  • prowla
    prowla Posts: 13,098
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    Don't engage with the debt colloectors. if that's who the letters indeed are from.

    put a cross through the address and write 'Not known at this address' or 'No longer lives here' and put it back in a postbox

    Getting involved in someone else's presumed financial issues isn't going to help anybody.

  • born_again
    born_again Posts: 13,684
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    Rob5342 said:
    Why is she opening his letters? If she just does what Fatbelly says then she wouldn't even know what they were.
    Where have I said that she opens the letters?

    It's quite easy to Google a return address to see who has sent the letter.

    It's her grandson, he may not live there but he does call around from time to time.
    Suggest that she gives him the letters & tells him to deal with them, or as above simply send them back. Rinse & repeat as they keep coming.

    It's not throwing him under the bus. 
    Life in the slow lane
  • sourcrates
    sourcrates Posts: 28,549
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    The thing is, debt collectors may on the surface appear to be compliant with the GDPR.

    But a leopard does not change his spots, they will not be too bothered who pays, as long as someone does, this could present a dilemma for Granny, if she engages with them.

    If the letter is not addressed to her, then follow fatbelly`s advice, and do not get involved in any way, shape or form.

    We have had posters before, in similar situations, that have contacted the collection companies, and of course, once they realise they have got a hit, they become relentless in their pursuit of the debt, even though he was not the debtor.

    Just pop them back in the post and do not get involved.
    I’m a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on the Debt free wannabe, Credit file and ratings, and Bankruptcy and living with it boards. If you need any help on these boards, do let me know. Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any posts you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button, or by emailing [email protected]. All views are my own and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.For free non-judgemental debt advice, contact either Stepchange, National Debtline, or CitizensAdviceBureaux.Link to SOA Calculator- https://www.stoozing.com/soa.php The "provit letter" is here-https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/2607247/letter-when-you-know-nothing-about-about-the-debt-aka-prove-it-letter
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