Help regarding ex partners new partner

Lily091213

Me and my ex have been divorced for years. We have one child and we share custody. She is the primary caregiver as she has the child more, as her school is closer to that house. 

We worked out a child maintenance payment from me to her, based on the number of days I see the child. All was fine, no problems. 

For the last 12 months, my ex has started seeing a new man. That's fine with me, he's good with the child. He is always at the house when I drop off and collect. Always. 

I've asked if he's now living there as I know that might affect the maintenance payments. I always get told no. 

He owns a house elsewhere so I always get told he lives there. But in reality, I'm pretty sure he's just letting his parents live there and he's living at my exs. He is there 100% of the time, based off the fact he's always there whenever I go there, he does school pickups most days etc. Whenever I phone my child, he's in the background which is most days.

But if my ex just says no to me, what can I do? 

marcia_

Lily091213 said:

Me and my ex have been divorced for years. We have one child and we share custody. She is the primary caregiver as she has the child more, as her school is closer to that house. 

We worked out a child maintenance payment from me to her, based on the number of days I see the child. All was fine, no problems. 

For the last 12 months, my ex has started seeing a new man. That's fine with me, he's good with the child. He is always at the house when I drop off and collect. Always. 

I've asked if he's now living there as I know that might affect the maintenance payments. I always get told no. 

He owns a house elsewhere so I always get told he lives there. But in reality, I'm pretty sure he's just letting his parents live there and he's living at my exs. He is there 100% of the time, based off the fact he's always there whenever I go there, he does school pickups most days etc. Whenever I phone my child, he's in the background which is most days.

But if my ex just says no to me, what can I do? 

 His presence doesn't effect you needing to pay child support even if he was a millionaire 

tripled

Why would him living there (or not) affect your responsibility to provide for your child? Does that somehow mean you see your child more, and are taking on more caregiving responsibilities and costs yourself? If not, I would respectfully suggest that the best thing to do is keep your nose out of your ex's business, and focus your energies on maintaining a good relationship with your ex and your child.

Lily091213

marcia_ said:

Lily091213 said:

Me and my ex have been divorced for years. We have one child and we share custody. She is the primary caregiver as she has the child more, as her school is closer to that house. 

We worked out a child maintenance payment from me to her, based on the number of days I see the child. All was fine, no problems. 

For the last 12 months, my ex has started seeing a new man. That's fine with me, he's good with the child. He is always at the house when I drop off and collect. Always. 

I've asked if he's now living there as I know that might affect the maintenance payments. I always get told no. 

He owns a house elsewhere so I always get told he lives there. But in reality, I'm pretty sure he's just letting his parents live there and he's living at my exs. He is there 100% of the time, based off the fact he's always there whenever I go there, he does school pickups most days etc. Whenever I phone my child, he's in the background which is most days.

But if my ex just says no to me, what can I do? 

 His presence doesn't effect you needing to pay child support even if he was a millionaire 

My mistake then. I thought I'd heard somewhere that a new partner contributing to that house would affect the maintenance calculation. Obviously not, from your response. Must be my mistake

tightauldgit

Doesn't affect maintenance payments in any way - they are based on the number nights they stay with you and YOUR income only. 

Flann3l

From what I understand if you both calculated this cost outside of court and agreed on the amount between you, it can't be changed. However, if the CSA calculated it based on certain criteria this would definitely effect the payments. For example if she had to put her rent cost down at 1600 per month and she is now paying 800 because there are splitting it half and half, this would effect the calculation. 

marcia_

Flann3l said:

From what I understand if you both calculated this cost outside of court and agreed on the amount between you, it can't be changed. However, if the CSA jcalculated it based on certain criteria this would definitely effect the payments. For example if she had to put her rent cost down at 1600 per month and she is now paying 800 because there are splitting it half and half, this would effect the calculation. 

No it would not. Resident parents income or outgoing has no bearing on what absent parent has to pay. 

Spendless

Is your ex receiving benefits as though she's single parent? That might explain why she tells you no-one else lives there.

I believe you're correct that this once did happen. I recall divorced friends of mine telling me this, it wasn't that the exes co-habiting OH income was taken into account, more that the calculation was based that the ex was no longer having to pay all the bills. It's a long time ago though said children are now late 20s-30s. From the replies it sounds like this is no longer the case.