What would you do? Debt and baillifs

Thenewme

hi, I hope I'm posting in the right place. My mental health is at an all time low and I haven't been able to see the wood for the trees for a long time. Unfortunately my default anxiety style leads me to bury my head which I'm trying to work on.

I'm around 11k in debt currently. It's a mix of old CC, catalogue, parking fines, CC debt and rent. Also an unpaid van tax fine for a van that was sold but details not transferred over for some reason. I have a fines review coming up in court for that which I'm dreading.

I've been on a DMP previously and reduced my debt massively. Unfortunately I then met my partner who has not been able to keep a steady job, has flitted between employed and self employed and also has CMS payments so actual income is low and sporadic. I have had 2 children (when things were a lot better) so things are expensive.

Im working p/t and can't increase my hours until next year when my youngest is in school. My wages are ok-ish, £1k per month. My partner is supposed to be on a decent wage now but there's always something that stops the full amount reaching us. This month he got paid £500.

I can handle the CC and catalogue debts. The council tax is in hand although I'm making quite high payments. Im now getting bailiffs letters about a vehicle registered to me, stupidly, but driven by partner for his old job, they were supposed to cover alll parking fines etc but haven't and he no longer works there of course.

I've paid a load off already previously but more are coming through, they're impossible to deal with to arrange an affordable repayment plan. They're starting at £189 and I'm trying to get them to agree to a plan but they don't answer emails, the phone just rings and WhatsApp is pointless. It's Bristow and Sutor that are chasing me. I dont want it to get to the point of them turning up and increasing the amount owed but I dont have the funds to pay it all off straight away.

Does anyone have any advice? I know a DMP won't cover parking fines etc, is there another way to deal with this affordably?

sourcrates

Are they collecting this debt for council parking fines or private ?

If you want the best advice, you should really post on the relevant sub board -

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/categories/parking-tickets-fines-parking

Thenewme

they're council. I'll try there too, thank you 😊

stymied

Did you give your partner’s details as the person who parked?

Boat_to_Bolivia

Thenewme said:

they're council. I'll try there too, thank you 😊

Best place for advice on Council Penalty Charge Notices is the PePiPoo forum.

Out_to_help

In relation to your fine, at what stage is the court at? Is it with the bailiffs?

luvmse

r.e cc, catalogue and any other unsecured debt... if you will not need more credit in the next 6-7 years just stop paying those debts. They will eventually default, all interest will stop and you can offer them a token payment per month, as little as £1. There is nothing they can do if you are genuinely skint.

RAS

Take advice about the parking fines; either name your partner or the company as the owner of the fines, as you've enough problems anyway.

Both Council Tax and rent are vitally important and you need to get them cleared up ASAP.

You also need a lot more transparency with your partner regarding income. Stuff doesn't just get deducted from your salary without reason.  What debts has he got of his own? Has he been robbing Peter to pay Paul then getting landed with two lots of CMS? Or is he paid 4 weekly and billed monthly?

And stop paying the CC and catalogue debts, they are irrelevant in the scheme of things, the sky won't fall in and you don't get bailiffs chasing them.

pelirocco

Sorry but there are too many red flags with your partner

MalMonroe

Hi, have  you had a word with someone at one of the free debt help agencies? StepChange, National Debtline, Citizens Advice.

You seem to have a lot of different debts coming at you from all corners - I agree with those who say to post on the relevant board for parking fines, etc. but you also have many other problems which need attention. Someone at one of the debt help agencies will be able to listen to your problems and point you in the right direction. They are non-judgemental, knowledgeable and friendly, in my personal experience.

Your total debt amount does not seem insurmountable to me but you do need some advice on how to prioritise and budget and that's what the agencies are there for.

I hate to agree with pelirocco, above - but it does seem that your partner is dragging you down. The biggest red flag for me is when you say "Unfortunately I then met my partner". Unfortunately? Most people are happy to have met their partner. Doesn't really sound as if he is the one for you. (Just my own opinion, obviously but I'm only responding to what you have said.)

It really wouldn't hurt to have a word with someone at one of the agencies. Even if it's just so they can help you to prioritise everything and advise about your fines review in court.

All the best to you, hope you manage to get things sorted out. 

smalandcute

I too am having issues with BS but regarding council tax. There really needs to be a watch dog for these type debt colletors in the same way there is for other debts and debt collectors are regulated by the Financial Ombudsman Service. BS are aware of my mental health issues and not giving any leeway either. It's effectly weponised intimidation to get us to pay.

As others have said speak to a debt helpline like stepchange and they will go through your options. They are incredibly supportive and knowledgeable.

As others have said, are you sure you are happy with your partner or would you prefer to separate? Is he loading more debt onto you or is he sorting his own debt out? Whilst working through your debt it may also be worth thinking about what kind of future you want and if you want your partner to be a part of that. If not, work out if you have taken on any of his debt and if there is any joint debt and get advise on this too with terms of a separation but if you still want to be with him then you really need to have an honest conversation about money and being debt free as well as what you need and expect from that relationship. 

I know it's not easy to make big decisions when you already feel the weight of the world on your shoulders and may be worth seeking out some help via therapy. Your work may be able to provide some therapy appointments free of charge, have a look at your staff benefits and check with HR.