Trying again 😪

Jensfrugalyear

So had a debt free diary before but not posted in a very long time!

Have gone backwards and forwards with our debts. I'll have a good few months then depression or overdrinking and making bad decisions takes over and before I know if I have spent a ridiculous amount.

Anyway, trying to get back on track again...although the car went in for a MOT today and needed £600 of repairs that I'm having to put on a credit card.

Total debt is about 59k...will update later once I've been and paid the garage. I'll also set out all our debts.

I've cut back the budget as much as we can without having to live too frugally...this doesn't work for us as I just say f**k it so I have built some fun money into the budget.

Hoping filling in this new diary will keep me on track, even on the bad days!

outoftheviciouscircle

I didn't want to read and run. You are in a very similar position to me. I started my debt free journey in December at £66k and I'm currently at just below £59k. It's tough but the end result will be worth it.
I'm finding the key is to budget and to be realistic with it. Make it too strict and you will soon fall off the wagon, so allow for a bit of fun money too.

I'll be subscribing and cheering you on.

Good Luck!!

Jensfrugalyear

Thank you @outoftheviciouscircle. That is amazing progress so far! 

Had a bit of luck tonight, the repairs for the MOT were £517 as the man gave me a discount as I always go to the same garage, feeling chuffed right now 😀 

Right here my list of debts at the moment, in no particular order:

HMRC tax bill £117.26, payments due to end June 2023

Old car loan £2055 - last payment due 1 May 2024 (final hurdle with this one!), but its for a car we no longer own as it kept breaking down.

Husband Barclaycard - £4100 0%

Halifax credit card - £6757, 0%

Sainsburys credit card -£4839 0%

Student loan -£4367 - last payment due 31 March 2024 - paying by direct debit £397 a month as I am near the end 🥳

My barclaycard £5215 - 14% on a payment plan to clear debt by December 2025

Loan that I took out to clear credit card balances (that I ended up running up again) £6167 due to end October 2026

MBNA £9389 0% this balance freaks me out as it is so high, it started at 12k though

Natwest loan £14451 I stupidly took this out as a consolidation loan FOR 8 YEAR😳😳 I yet again ran up the debt, this is due to be paid off September 2026

Tesco credit card £1878, this had the car repairs put onto it too. Need to try and get this moved to a 0%

My debt is due to years of careless spending, not paying attention and not closing accounts once they are paid off. It's so easy to swipe when you have no cash. 

My husband keeps saying he will help me with money and then never does. He pays his fair share its just the monitoring, tracking and budgeting. I've told him I need help and accountability but never follows through. We had the same conversation last month where he says he will try harder, lets seenif he follows through.

I know this is going to be a tough old journey but I need to be focused and accountable...hence me starting a new diary.

I also have hope with loans closing over the next few years, there will be more cash for us to pay off debt!

outoftheviciouscircle

The hardest bit is always sitting down and adding it all up, sometimes I think when we accumulate a large amount of debt we come a bit naive to the total figure. That was me anyway, when I saw £66k on the calculator, I knew that something had to be done.

Getting a plan together of how you want to prioritise your debts is a great idea, sending any overpayment to one debt and seeing that come down and then disappear is highly motivating. Some find setting a date to be debt free by motivating, I find the opposite with £59k of debt as realistically I know that is a long way off.

Jensfrugalyear

I would love to have a date, but as its ages away it feels demotivating.

We have a holiday coming up in August, All inclusive but I know we will need some spending money too so saving additional cash for that currently.

My plan for the next few months is not increasing the debt. Had no choice with the car MOT but its the little things that usually add up quickly. Have promised my husband that there will be no spending on credit card without his prior knowledge, this is stopping the random spending when feeling down.

Need to track the weekend spending now. There was a few unplanned purchases, probably adding up to about £50, which is less than usual so taking that as a win.

millymolly22

I've been where you are.  Numerous consolidation loans then using the cards again.  It's really hard to break the cycle.  I have a small amount of debt now but it's too easy to use the credit card and it's mounting up again.  My plan is the same as long as the credit card use stops and the debt reduces even by a small amount I am taking it as a win.  Good luck

Jensfrugalyear

Thank you @millymolly22

I have just tracked my spending for the weekend and the unplanned stuff came to £100 not £50 🙈 just goes to show it easily adds up. It went on hair dye, fish supplies, some electrolytes for long runs some drinks and vitamins. I can cover the extra stuff but its eye opening when you think you've just spent extra on a few things.

LittleMissDetermined

Hi @Jensfrugalyear 👋 I remember your old diary. I am day 5 into being debt free (finally!) but I have been where you are and understand it seems daunting. It took me 3 attempts at a diary on here before I realised that there's no magic wand, I wasn't going to win the lottery and no rich African prince email would be the real deal. The only way I could deal with it was to tackle it head on, make a plan and overpay any which way I could.

It's worth it in the end, and I'm not gonna lie, it wasn't easy. I went without things I 'wanted' but didn't need. I turned down nights out and weekends away, but still saved for other events so I didn't miss everything.

I thing your first step is to try and get everything onto a 0% deal. If you've negotiated a payment plan with Barclays, will they remove the interest being charged?

You also need to either get your OH on board or take over the budgeting. Now we have a joint account I do all the household budgeting and forecasting, so he just puts a fixed amount in each month when he gets paid. It's working well so far and we are even getting a bit of a buffer for emergencies.

If your getting a lot of unplanned spending could you look at using the cash envelope budget system? It works for some.

Will subscribe to cheer you along. Lots of luck!

LMD x

Jensfrugalyear

Thanks @LittleMissDetermined I remember you too. Well done on finally reaching debt freedom! 

I've tried cash envelope system but I spend money faster when I have physical cash so avoid it where possible. I do the budgeting now and he gets a set amount, but he really doesn't think when he sits there suggesting things to do. Not sure where he thinks the money comes from which is why I want him to get involved.

We have cut back on expenses for ages, but still struggling. Next year I have 2 loans that will be paid off which will give us an extra £550 a month so I know we will be able to start making big dents in the rest of the debt then, just need to get through this year.

I have given up drinking, which helps with the extra spending. Just need to tackle the spending when I say f*ck it now. I am tracking every single penny spent so I can review monthly and then a big review in a few months to see where the pain points really are. 

I have realised how much stress this debt is now causing. I never seemed to be that bothered before, but think I have just been hiding how I feel. Some days adulting is hard!

I'll plug away at it where I can for now and will only spend on credit when it is absolutely essential (like the car repairs). I really wish I had tackled this in lockdown when we could cut back on travel expenses, but here we are. I know it will get better as my loans clear, and 1 day I will be on the debt free board!

CRANKY40

So if spending is the answer to feeling down have you thought of something that you can do instead? Comfort spending when you're in debt just makes you more miserable in the long run. Maybe start a bucket list of things that you can do once the debt is gone? Write a list of minor treats for when each debt is paid off too?

I started making things when I was miserable. I still knit or crochet now because the final result of actually making a real thing cheers me up. I joined a beginner crochet page on farcebook because even though I've been making blankets for years I'm not great with patterns. There are things in that group that I never even thought possible to make by crochet 🤣 I can bake too but "comfort eating" when you're overweight is also bad. One of my big changes was to stop calling the dodgy behaviour "comfort" anything and to refer to it by it's real name. Emotional eating, emotional spending and to look for the cause instead of trying to make it go away by covering it up. Everyone is different though so maybe those ideas won't suit you. I just thought I'd throw a few suggestions your way in case they help. Good luck  😊

Jensfrugalyear

Thank you @CRANKY40 I am an emotional eater too so try not to bake often as I end up eating the majority of it 😄 I knit and crochet, never really thought to try doing it when stressed though, usually just when I fancy making something.

I like the idea of calling it out for what it is, I think I do hide behind it as comfort. Saying I'm going to add to my debt to make me feel better is a great idea to connect the emotion to the action so will try this going forward.

They really are great suggestions, thank you for sharing.