Having a small wedding - no guests!

gracie83

Can you have a small group of people attend a church wedding without it looking really weird! Basically I have no money so doing it on the cheap so I only want my nearest and dearest to attend. I dont want a do after just a nice family restaurant meal. If you have a church wedding do you have to have the standard white dress or can you get away with a dress I can wear again the future? I don't see why I should get further in debt just to formalise the 6 year relationship me and my fiance have had. I would prefer a church wedding to a registary office as a small deeply hidden part of me is still religious and believes there are certain events in your life which has to be done in church.

As an aside does any one know how long it takes to rebecome a member of a catholic community? I know the priest will only marry people who belong to his 'flock' but I have not been in many years (i lapsed after leaving a very strict catholic school). My fiance is CofE which will not help matters. Should I attend for a couple of months before approaching the priest!

lavandergirl_2

emailed you

http://www.interfaithmarriage.org.uk/index.htm
http://www.catholic-ew.org.uk/nav/interfaith.htm

gracie83

Lavandergirl - thanks for links and message.

The more I research Catholic weddings the more messy and confusing the whole issue is. when the only way to get married is to lie to a priest (!!!) something is wrong you would have thought they would encourage marriage not force counciling on people.

Oh and about the small church wedding. I think I am concerned that in my fairly big local church there will only be a handfull of us there and it will look very strange.

Bendybops19

Who cares if it looks strange, its your wedding so do what you want I only want a tiny wedding, i couldnt care less if we only take up the first row

Katmc2k

hey

I guess it depends on your local priest/parish. We are finding our Catholic priest to be an absolute lifesaver, he is so kind and encouraging and doesn't mind about us attending church etc. We were both brought up in the Catholic faith and it is important to us but he isn't keeping score about our attendance at church or anything, we don't even live in the parish as its my childhood home and we now live 40 miles away. Its a shame that's not going to work out for you.

We are doing a few pre-marriage bits and pieces but I am really looking forward to them! I don't know if this is what you mean when you say counselling?

I think you should have anyone you want there, if I could get away with it I would do that too. In terms of your dress you should wear anything you feel beautiful and special in. If you do want the big white dress there are ways of getting them which won't blow the budget, mine was £150 in the sale and its huge and fluffy and white!

Good luck with the rest of your planning.

whitewing

Yes I think you can marry with a small group of people in a church and it not look weird. I think that's what we are going to have to do anyway! It's just about arranging the space so that it looks planned eg in a more modern church that has freestanding chairs you could arrange it in a horse shoe shape.

Ask the vicar/priest/whoever what their ideas would be. Most people wouldn't think to ask.

The_Good_Fairy

My partner proposed to me last month and we are planning to have exactly the same kind of wedding as you I don't want loads of people there who I don't know, I'd be too shy, also the money side of things, no way could we afford it!

Please don't worry about what other people will think, who cares! This is about you and your fella making a commitment and professing your love for each other, who is important in that? You and him that's all!

Hey maybe me, you and whitewing should club together we might be able to afford a bigger do

As for the church, I would have a word with the priest, ask him what the requirements would be, they might be quite relaxed about it there.

Good luck! Sarah x

whitewing

The_Good_Fairy wrote: »

Hey maybe me, you and whitewing should club together we might be able to afford a bigger do

You can do the candles!!!!

The_Good_Fairy

oooh yeah, I do a lovely heart shaped wedding cake hehe