Extremely ill with worry and the stress of it all
edited 6 January at 12:38AM in Debt-free wannabe
19 replies 2.8K views
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For me, the fact you have posted here asking for help says a lot - you are brave and will do what you need to do to look after yourself. Tragic events by their nature are unplanned and uninvited. My advice on that is to find ways to be kind to yourself, forgive yourself for anything you think you've done to get in this situation, and calmly focus on the next thing you need to do.
I have felt similarly to what you've described in the past, and I can promise you it all feels bigger than it is right now. It all feels more pressured than it might really be. There will be a time in the not too distant future that you will briefly forget ever feeling this way
I won't make any assumptions about your marriage, but it is definitely true that a problem shared is a problem halved. If not your partner, maybe a trusted friend could help lift some of the emotional weight? Keeping everything to yourself will not be helping. Find a healthy way to let out some of that internal pressure (for me, that's talking to a friend).
Getting clarity also helps. An SOA putting everything in black and white gets you seeing what you're playing with. When it's hazy in your head, it creates more stress. More stress stops you knowing what to do and moving forward.
It sounds like you've achieved a lot before, and I'm guessing there were moments when you tackled something head on and trusted yourself. You've got this too, I'm sure And the ever-so kind people of this forum are here to support you.
Try out the advice given so far and when you feel up to it feel free to add up the numbers or post a soa.
Use this for the basis of your letter
@fatbelly thank you or the letter template very helpful.
@Cheesephetamine I am sorry to read that you have been in a similar situation with your health, and thank you for the offer to help.
@theoretica I haven't ever claimed a penny, didn't even cross my mind.
From the sound of it defaults are inevitable so I would open a basic bank account with no overdraft unless you already have one.
Let your creditors know or phone step change if you would rather have a third party deal with them.
An soa would be useful.
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