Admitting I have problem debt...

NeverendingDMP

Hiya, a spending diary for a couple of months might be an idea so you can get a good picture of where you stand.

If you decide you have enough to service the debts then I'm another vote for focusing on the Barclaycard to get an easy win.

Try the website what's the cost, enter the  debts in and play around with what happens if you can pay an extra 50 or 100 a month.

For now record your spends, check your gas and electric costs and look at what is your true budget as all-sorts if things will be unaccounted for without you realizing. I'm afew years in and still finding things I hadn't accounted for in my budget too!

In the long term the size of the debts is going to overwhelm you. So break it down. If you decide to focus on Barclaycard for example 1% of the debt is 10.76. far easier to find and less stressful of a number to aim for.
Good luck

Rob5342

Don't beat yourself up about it. You have admitted you have a problem and told your wife about it which was a difficult step to overcome. Now you have got started on it look forward and put all your energy into how you are going to overcome your situation instead of looking back at things that can't be changed. I was in a similar situation and got into over £44k of credit card debt, but admitting it was a problem and telling my wife was a real turning point. 18 months later and we have got it down to £31k through a combination of a debt mangement plan and refunds from affordability complaints, and after making CCA requests we have found that only £4200 of it is actually enforcable and we should have that cleared quite soon.

You absolutely have to get your wife involved with tackling it. If you work together you will help keep each other on track and you'll be less likely to slip into old abouts.

You also need to make a serious change to the way you budget. We started by having a seperate account we used for our general spending that we paid into weekly from our pay and bills account. We found that quite an effetive approach as we could easily see it heading towards zero each time we spent (more so than having a months worth of money in there where we might have been tempted to spend a lot to begin with and be short at the end). After a while we switched to a Monzo account which is far more convenient as we can split the money into numerous different pots in one account instead of having seperate accounts we transferred between.

You need to reduce your spending but allow yourself some treats too. It might take a bit longer but it will help make it more sustainable so you actually get to the end. We found it helpful to plan our treats in advance, for example a meal out at the end of January that we put money aside for instead of just getting a takeaway whenever we fancied it and using a credit card to pay for it. 

Sam_X_10

Thanks again all, honestly appreciating so much your advice and general encouragement to get going with this. I'm glad I've taken this step to speak out, that was one of the worst things I've ever done! 
Just to clear a few things up - 
1. We pay 150 service charge per annum for our home. It's a new build estate. It's not leasehold but it's something all the properties pay as the land isn't council owned. 
2. We have 2 cars, an astra and a corsa. The astra is 300pm and is due for change. There's equity in it so we could actually sell that, get a cheaper car and use the equity (I'm not sure exactly how much, need to check) my wife is community nurse and needs car. Hence the high mileage, she spends 300pm on fuel sometimes more. 
3. I'm locked in with Sky for another 12 months so can't reduce the 80pm for tv/WiFi/phone. 
4. Electric bill has always been lower than gas. Our home is timber frame and warm so hardly use heating. 
5. Food budget covers pet food, but agree we could try to be more careful with this. Hold my hands up, I'm terrible for takeaways. 
6. Budget for hair is for the 2 of us - we are both women. Great idea about the colleges. 
7. I have life insurance taken direct from wage, along with a very small savings pot of 10pm - I have 120 saved in that so I can use that towards the Barclaycard. 
8. I have set up a £50pm savings which I won't touch. 
9. I currently pay over 500pm into a pension direct from pay packet - I'm considering coming out of the pension for 12 months which could help? But then I'm concerned I'll get used to having the money and not go back into the pension after 12 months??
10. I have a few items I can sell - a Nintendo switch, a mountain bike that's hardly been used and some other bits and bobs. I'll get onto that ASAP especially with Christmas, I'm sure there'll be buyers. 
Thanks again all xx 

Sncjw

What kinds of pension is it..nhs? 

Is the £500 pension payment all voluntary if so just pay the required amount the automatically comes out of your payslip and use the rest towards the debt. 

Martico

A few of us on the boards scrape a few quid together by doing surveys through Prolific Academic - I worked out recently that's pulling in around £85 a month for me on average. I work from home so can find the time when surveys pop up, but that kind of thing might be useful to chip away a bit more. 
Take a look at the "Boost your income" subforum on this site

Sam_X_10

Sncjw said:

What kinds of pension is it..nhs? 

Is the £500 pension payment all voluntary if so just pay the required amount the automatically comes out of your payslip and use the rest towards the debt. 

It's with the public sector. The 500 is the minimum they take. It varies slightly month by month as its a percentage of whatever I earn. 

Sam_X_10

Martico said:

A few of us on the boards scrape a few quid together by doing surveys through Prolific Academic - I worked out recently that's pulling in around £85 a month for me on average. I work from home so can find the time when surveys pop up, but that kind of thing might be useful to chip away a bit more. 
Take a look at the "Boost your income" subforum on this site

I've signed up, but there's a waiting list...I'll get notified when there is room for me 😊 thank you! 

sammyjammy

Sam_X_10 said:

Sncjw said:

What kinds of pension is it..nhs? 

Is the £500 pension payment all voluntary if so just pay the required amount the automatically comes out of your payslip and use the rest towards the debt. 

It's with the public sector. The 500 is the minimum they take. It varies slightly month by month as its a percentage of whatever I earn. 

Leave it as is, its your future and that £500 is likely costing you less than £400, its tax efficient.

Martico

Great! I signed up in early July and got started at the end of July, didn't take too long, hope it works out for you.
Some are dull, some rather daft, some really interesting. 

Martico

Take a look through the "Prolific Academic Survey alerts" thread if you find time, that's where we share thoughts