Giant mortgage, single income… hi ho, hi ho, hi ho

powerspowers

savingholmes said:

I would wait for the bike... I know it's hard but a 40% difference is a lot. It's good to teach your kids delayed gratification too... Even if you went in to buy it - it's rare that you can take them home immediately. They normally have to spend some time setting the bike up for you. You could take him in to choose it but delay the purchase until the voucher comes.

The cycle scheme takes a long time to see the benefit I think? You have to pay the loan off over 4-5 years if I remember correctly otherwise you have to pay the tax difference back.  I decided against it in the end as felt it was a faff. It might be more worthwhile if OH is a higher rate tax payer? 

charliechopstick

I’m not sure if different schemes work in different ways, but this one was supposed to be deducted from gross salary over a period of 12 months. 

I would have used the discount to get DS a higher spec bike rather than to save the 40% (eek, not very MSE - I have a long way to go, don’t I?!). 

Regardless, no sign of the voucher and I didn’t want to leave DS with no presents to open on his birthday so we’ve been to Halfords and bought a bike in a box. It’s shiny and red, and DS will be over the moon with it. 

DP paid half which was unexpected and really kind of him, and he will help DS to build it on his birthday. Educational and fun 😎  It also means my birthday spending is not as high as anticipated, and that should be an extra £100 I can therefore chuck at the mortgage. 

savingholmes

Always nice to get some help with the cost

charliechopstick

Phew… all the birthday madness is over. DS was very happy with his bike, and we had the family over for a takeaway. 

Now the big spends are out of the way, I’ve re-done my YNAB today. 

I’ve got £225 put aside for the festival. Sounds like a lot but unfortunately it’s a captive market so food and drinks prices are unbelievable. I’ll do what I can to take plenty of snacks and drinks with us, but will only be able to have those whilst I’m the campsite. It’s also our “holiday” so I want to enjoy it without worrying too much about money. 

The other big  happenings this month are the dog’s kennel fees whilst we’re at the festival, which is budgeted for, and my friend’s anniversary party. Thankfully we can take our own booze so the costs there should be minimal. 😊

After doing YNAB, I may possibly have £498 to send to mortgage overpayment. I’m hesitating a bit about doing it yet as we get our fertility test results on Friday and at the moment we have no idea what might be needed. Well we have some idea, but if there are any issues on DP’s side too then it could mean we need additional “services” which would increase the costs. 

So for now, I’m holding on to the £498 pending Friday’s results. It’s a bit too tempting just to hit the big button and send it to the mortgage though! 

savingholmes

Good luck for Friday. I can imagine you are on tenterhooks.

charliechopstick

Thanks for the well wishes.

The appointment was worse than I had expected. Originally I was planning to freeze my eggs, as I would like a child in a few years - we’re just not ready at the moment. We were told that freezing embryos has a higher success rate so the appointment was to start IVF, freeze some embryos which we could then come back and use in a few years’ time when we’re ready practically and financially. 

Unfortunately the news was pretty bleak - my reserve of eggs is about what you’d expect from a woman +10 years older than I am. Even if we did IVF right now, our chances would only be about 10%.

In my head, if we waited 5 years, I could get the mortgage down to a very small sum, DP has some more time to sort his own money issues and become financially secure, and then we could each drop to part time and be more present parents than I was able to be for DS. 

So lots of yesterday was spent in tears, and now there is a big dilemma. Time is not on my side. 

savingholmes

That sounds like a lot to take in. Gentle hugs...

AgathaSquirrel

Are your chances worse if you freeze the eggs now , rather than going through IVF now? IVF statistics are always bleak. Yet, there are so many success stories (I am one of them).

It’s such an emotional, difficult decision. Hugs.

charliechopstick

Thank you both for your well wishes. All hugs gratefully received right now!

Agatha, they’ve said the best thing to do is to go straight to IVF now. Second best to do partial IVF and freeze embryos now. But because my egg count is so low, they think they might only be able to retrieve one, maybe two, in the first place. You’ve then got to hope that some are good enough to fertilise, then that they survive the incubation for 5 days, then that they are strong enough to freeze, before finally hoping that it sticks once implanted. That took us down to the statistical 10%. They said I would need the max dose of stimulation meds, estimated cost around £15k 😱 So there is definitely a chance, but it’s a very expensive chance. I’ve tried not to think too much about it this weekend but will need to face it head on at some point. There have been a few tears this weekend which is unlike me really. 

I’ve sent £300 to the mortgage overpayment today. I’ve also DIY’ed a costume for this weekend - we’re off to the festival and they have a fancy dress theme on one day which is “under the sea”. A £3 hat from Primark, some bubble wrap and fairy lights, and I’ve got myself quite a fetching jellyfish costume. It’s been a nice distraction too. 

savingholmes

Hope the festival went well