Doing it for my girls ……..

soulmate19

I am laying here in bed listening to my girls. DD are 16,13 and 6. Don’t judge me I know they should be asleep by now.  BUT 16 and 13 year olds are actually being nice to each other and Playing a game together and 6 year old is tucked up in her own bed (has taken a lot to get her into her own bed!) and is reading away to herself and for the first time in such a long time they all sound so happy. It’s made me realise this has really been missing from our lives because I’m always at work or rushing around doing things for other people which usually isn’t appreciated.  I need more of this in my life.  I need to actually make the changes I’m always procrastinating about to enable this for them. 

I owe I think approximately £16,000.  I waste money and don’t really know where to start. Tomorrow I am going to write a list of all my debts and then I’ll know exactly how much it is I owe.  Then I can decide how to tackle the debt.  I’m going to use this diary to take stock of my debt, my spending and sometimes my feelings that I just can’t tell to the people in my life.  Before I think I’ve set myself up to do so much so quickly and then when I can’t achieve it I have given up and stuck my head in the sand.  This time it’s different. I’m going to be more realistic and not give up, no matter how hard it is. 

2022 is the perfect time for me to start turning my life around. 

leannes_3

You can do this! Slow and steady, but you will get there! Sharing your feelings on the journey is good too as there will be ups and downs!

Good luck! 

jack_in_the_box

I was in your position and ignored my debts. I contacted stepchange and they were a great help. I pay them  what I can afford each month, I no longer get letters from my creditors. It is such a relief! 

Hope it helps
Happy debt free new year.

soulmate19

Thanks jack_in_the_box and leannes_3  

So I’ve totalled it up.  Whilst not quite as bad as I estimated it’s still a huge number, slightly worried I’ve missed something off but will have to add it on if I remember anything.  It’s as follows : 

Loan £2073.98
credit card 1 £108.26
credit card 2  £652.28
credit card 3 £2297.75
credit card 4 £5149.91
credit card 5 £358.28
paypal £2490.66
ao £601.20
very £1370.37
(bnpl of this is £577.99) 
Total :      £15,102.69

I have just labelled them credit card 1, credit card 2 for purpose of being on here but I have actually shocked myself. By typing them as that it’s made me realise how many I have, because by calling them by name ie Barclaycard it somehow didn’t seem so bad?   or is this possibly part of the lightbulb experience?  

In order for my expectations to be realistic I’m going to set myself small targets that I can actually achieve. My first is going to be to clear credit card 1, I think this will give me motivation and a mental boost. Then when this is cleared instead of rolling that payment onto another debt for now it will be the start of my emergency fund.  

I’ve lost myself with my bank and don’t know what bills are due out still and how it balances with what’s left in the bank. It’s a week until I will receive my tax credits and 11 days until pay day. Tomorrow I will try and get my head round it, I’m too tired now. 

Put £25 fuel in my gas guzzler car and £30 each on the gas and electric, car was down to 6 miles left and both the gas and electricity were on the emergency. 

Tomorrow DD is back to college followed by smallest DD back to school on Wednesday and middle DD on Thursday. I’m not back at work myself until next week. I plan to be more organised by taking lunch to work and preparing this plus girls lunches the night before. Hopefully this will help me lose some weight alongside saving money.  Hoping to give the house a good clean and tidy tomorrow and visit a friend in the afternoon as her family has been poorly and meant I couldn’t drop her Xmas present off before now. 

Nintud

Good luck with your debt busting goals.

Have you considered putting up a SOA? There are so many knowledgeable forum items about that can help you spot savings.

Coffeekup

soulmate19 said:

I waste money and don’t really know where to start. 
Then I can decide how to tackle the debt.  I’m going to use this diary to take stock of my debt, my spending and sometimes my feelings that I just can’t tell to the people in my life.  Before I think I’ve set myself up to do so much so quickly snip---

2022 is the perfect time for me to start turning my life around. 

Your making the start now which is good as the sooner you start the sooner you can deal with it and the less chance it's out of control. You've come to the right place for help, read other diary's and see how others deal with their situation and goals.
Fill in your income / outcome into a statement of affairs first as that can be a real eye opener to where your money is going, then post on here for advice on ways and where to cut back if you want.

As for your goals of paying back cc1 first I think could be a good call to keep you motivated and make you feel good. Get to know the interest each company is charging you too, off the top of my head very is around 40% which is bonkers so getting that down next maybe the next point of call.

In the meantime have anything around the house you can sell to hel pay some if this off, vinted is good for clothes or so a friend's partner seems to think? Any overtime? Buy something if you need it and not want it.

Open up 2 accounts you'll move money across too, one for birthdays and Christmas, and one for school trips and holiday/holiday spendings... Then when an event comes up it's not so unexpected you'll have the funds set aside for it, (as long as you have budgeted for it correctly), which will inturn stops you using credit to pay for thing's.
Maybe open a 3rd one for car (i.e. mot, insurance, wear and tear, road tax).
Then a 4th at a later date just for savings, once the debts gave come down or your paying no interest.

Either way I hope I gave you food for thought and wish you well in your journey.

DrCarrie

Great that you are now opening up to what you need to do, well done it's a hard step. 

There is lots of advice on the forum, it will take some time to work out what works for you but a really robust and realistic budget is very important. Good luck, and keep posting. 

FootyFanDan

"It’s made me realise this has really been missing from our lives because I’m always at work or rushing around doing things for other people which usually isn’t appreciated.  I need more of this in my life.  I need to actually make the changes I’m always procrastinating about to enable this for them. "


This part resonated with me so much, I had this moment where I thought it is time to put the ones that matter first. I think sometimes with all the life crap we put up with sometime the importance of those around us somewhat gets lost. Good luck on your journey to getting to where you want to be. I think the important thing is to set yourself goals that are realistic to your situation and also to remember it took time to get the debt built up so it won't be wiped out instantly so don't get too down on yourself if there is a few hiccups on route.

good luck you have got this!

jack_in_the_box

You really can't do this on your own. Just give stepchange a call, it's a charity organised company, they are free and will help you! It will stop the creditors letters, phone calls etc! I hope you get it sorted!

Good Luck!