Bullying and harassment

iwblue

I am being accused of b&h. I have seen the minutes so far and they are all stements with no one examples or witnesses.... I have dates and times of examples to counteract the accusations.
This is very stressful and her accusations and lack of examples I believe they were buyyling and harrrassing me..... I have loads of examples that these are examples it was the other way round. They were only with me 5 months and I felt I was more than reasonable in dealing with issues.... Too long to go into..... As I'm the leader I want to counter grieve against their statements which are lies with my evidence..... Any thoughts.... Im tired and stressed 

General_Grant

iwblue said:

I am being accused of b&h. I have seen the minutes so far and they are all stements with no one examples or witnesses.... I have dates and times of examples to counteract the accusations.
This is very stressful and her accusations and lack of examples I believe they were buyyling and harrrassing me..... I have loads of examples that these are examples it was the other way round. They were only with me 5 months and I felt I was more than reasonable in dealing with issues.... Too long to go into..... As I'm the leader I want to counter grieve against their statements which are lies with my evidence..... Any thoughts.... Im tired and stressed 

How do "examples" counteract the accusations?  Is that an "on balance" situation?

Were you somewhere else and can prove you were not in any way in contact with the accuser on the dates they claim?

Savvy_Sue

Thoughts: if you're in a trade union, speak to them and get their support. 

MalMonroe

iwblue said:

I am being accused of b&h. I have seen the minutes so far and they are all stements with no one examples or witnesses.... I have dates and times of examples to counteract the accusations.
This is very stressful and her accusations and lack of examples I believe they were buyyling and harrrassing me..... I have loads of examples that these are examples it was the other way round. They were only with me 5 months and I felt I was more than reasonable in dealing with issues.... Too long to go into..... As I'm the leader I want to counter grieve against their statements which are lies with my evidence..... Any thoughts.... Im tired and stressed 

A few questions to think about (sorry) - not necessarily answer on here -

What minutes have you seen? Were you able to also have a say and have your comments put in those minutes?

Has any official action been taken and were you allowed time to present your own case?

Were there any witnesses to any alleged bullying and harassment that took place? 

A very good place to start with all employment issues is Acas - link here - https://www.acas.org.uk/contact

They can advise both employers and employees.

Also Citizens Advice can help - free phone numbers in this link -

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/about-us/contact-us/contact-us/contact-us/

Some advice about problems at work in this link -

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/work/problems-at-work/

I hope you manage to get things sorted out soon. 

[Deleted User]

I think you need to lay out exactly what happened clearly. I appreciate you are stressed but you will need to do it at some point anyway.

elsien

Is this still at the investigation stage or has a formal disciplinary process now started? 

Wyndham

I had a similar situation - a few years ago now, and I came through it, and came through it stronger. But I do remember how painful it was at the time. So, I'm sorry that you are going through this.

I know it's hard, but try to be rational. If you have examples, get them together. Get a good friend to review them from the outside (you won't be able to do that at the moment even if you think you can), and revise them as you need to based on their feedback.

Others have given good advice. @Savvy_Sue mentions trade unions, and I know how helpful my trade union was for me. And I wish I'd contacted Citizens Advice as @MalMonroe mentions - I now know they are brilliant.

Good luck. Please PM me if you want more personalised advice - you're not alone, not the first, and won't be the last.

Undervalued

Wyndham said:

I had a similar situation - a few years ago now, and I came through it, and came through it stronger. But I do remember how painful it was at the time. So, I'm sorry that you are going through this.

I know it's hard, but try to be rational. If you have examples, get them together. Get a good friend to review them from the outside (you won't be able to do that at the moment even if you think you can), and revise them as you need to based on their feedback.

Others have given good advice. @Savvy_Sue mentions trade unions, and I know how helpful my trade union was for me. And I wish I'd contacted Citizens Advice as @MalMonroe mentions - I now know they are brilliant.

Good luck. Please PM me if you want more personalised advice - you're not alone, not the first, and won't be the last.

They can be, but sadly they can also be dreadful too. It really depends on whether you are one of the limited number of such cases that they put to a qualified lawyer or if, like the majority, you get a bit of advice from a well meaning but often inept volunteer!

Remember too that ACAS (beloved by some on here) is, at the first level, just a call centre staffed by people with limited training largely reading from a script. At higher levels you get to deal with experience and properly trained people but remember they are not on you side. They are a neutral arbitration service and do not provide legal advice.

TBagpuss

OP, its difficult to advice without more information, however:

- If you feel that you have been the victim of harassment or bullying  then follow your employers grievance procedure about that. If the allegations relate to the same incidents / interactions as a complaint or grievance which they have made relating to you then the employer may well chose to look at them together.

- I am not clear what you mean when you say you have seen minutes. IS there a formal disciplinary process and if so, what stage has it reached? In what context have you need shown the minutes, and what are they minutes of? 

If things are at an early, investigative stage they are gathering information, and it may not go beyond that .
If you are specifically asked about the incidents then it is not unreasonable to ask for more information, to try to understand what specifically you are being accused of.


It's also worth taking a bit of time to think about the interactions you have had with this person to try to see if there has been anything which they may have seen as harassment or bullying - for instance, something which one persona perceives as being firm or blunt, may appear to someone else as being aggressive or as bullying, so it is worth considering whether they could have been any mismatch between what you intended and what they perceived. 

Reginald74

OP: start with the ACAS definitions of bullying and harassment in the workplace. They are often mis-used and misunderstood by employees and employers:

https://www.acas.org.uk/handling-a-bullying-harassment-discrimination-complaint

The examples they give on that page are particularly helpful. 

UKPCNumpty

I had a similar situation though on the other end. When I questioned my employers regarding illegal dumping of hazardous materials on their estate, my previous employers spent an in ordinate amount of time doing their level best to accuse me of harassment, wrong doing, being poor at my job, using company vehicles for private use, and the list went on. They even coerced other employees to claim I had harassed them. Thankfully I had written, audio and video evidence to the contrary as I am a little anally retentive in keeping records.
I stupidly took them to Acas and quickly found I was personally out of my depth, legally. Even though I thought they are supposed to help you, to a degree, it is best to get legal representation. The person I worked for, is a billionaire hedge fund manager, and he had way more resources than I. I ended up dropping it even though I had more evidence and was clearly in the right, it took more time away from me finding a new and better job. It took a year to get over the 2 years of working hell, I went through, but have found a better job, better people to work for, and a better life. 

Maybe a fresh perspective and new job might be the best option, if you can go, rather than flight it?