Operation Time Off

[Deleted User]

I’m after some advice please as would like to know where I stand with my current employer who I have been with for just over 2 years. I was diagnosed with cartilage damage to my knees and after medical advice was given a date for surgery for knee arthroscopy in August 2021.  On telling my Managers Wife (who I don’t work for but husband and wife share an office with two businesses) was told - in front of an office full of people that I couldn’t have the operation as ‘it wasn’t convenient for her and she was too busy with her own company to sort her husband out’ (it’s just me and him in the office as other employees are field based).  Aside from being humiliated-you could have heard a pin drop-I was speechless but managed to ask when would be convenient to be told October!! When I saw my Manager-he quoted his wife then made light of it as to who wants to self isolate in August.  So I’ve had the Op today.  Since then - dynamics in the office has changed.  Basically-they advertised my job - with me still being employed.  They weren’t going to tell me but I found it on Indeed so I challenged my Manager and said I feel his wife has an issue with me.  He admitted she did but she does with everyone.  I’ve watched how she operates and she really does slag everyone off and refers to some staff as Minions.  Anyway-outside of being mainly my position it would also be working as her PA (which I refused to do as I can’t work for her).  They assumed that after my op - I would be off for weeks but at no point was there a discussion. Once I knew more - I told them I would be off for a few days so when she was setting up my replacement she just said ‘oh god’ and I asked what she meant by that and she said ‘thought you would be off for weeks’. I said that I had no idea where she got that from. She also told my replacement that I was due an op on the other knee in January-news to me. So after today’s op and telling the Consultant about my job-he asked when they expect me back and I said Monday.  He then signed me off for two weeks 🤣. So my questions are this: can you really tell somebody-who isn’t your employee-that you can’t have an operation as not convenient for them?
can you employ my replacement whilst I’m still employed?
Husband and wife (and it’s always what she wants) so can’t see there is anything I can do!
Can I give my two weeks sick leave as notice instead of a month as they already have my replacement or can I resign with immediate effect?
Thank you and sorry so long. 

Undervalued

Rasharoon said:

I’m after some advice please as would like to know where I stand with my current employer who I have been with for just over 2 years. I was diagnosed with cartilage damage to my knees and after medical advice was given a date for surgery for knee arthroscopy in August 2021.  On telling my Managers Wife (who I don’t work for but husband and wife share an office with two businesses) was told - in front of an office full of people that I couldn’t have the operation as ‘it wasn’t convenient for her and she was too busy with her own company to sort her husband out’ (it’s just me and him in the office as other employees are field based).  Aside from being humiliated-you could have heard a pin drop-I was speechless but managed to ask when would be convenient to be told October!! When I saw my Manager-he quoted his wife then made light of it as to who wants to self isolate in August.  So I’ve had the Op today.  Since then - dynamics in the office has changed.  Basically-they advertised my job - with me still being employed.  They weren’t going to tell me but I found it on Indeed so I challenged my Manager and said I feel his wife has an issue with me.  He admitted she did but she does with everyone.  I’ve watched how she operates and she really does slag everyone off and refers to some staff as Minions.  Anyway-outside of being mainly my position it would also be working as her PA (which I refused to do as I can’t work for her).  They assumed that after my op - I would be off for weeks but at no point was there a discussion. Once I knew more - I told them I would be off for a few days so when she was setting up my replacement she just said ‘oh god’ and I asked what she meant by that and she said ‘thought you would be off for weeks’. I said that I had no idea where she got that from. She also told my replacement that I was due an op on the other knee in January-news to me. So after today’s op and telling the Consultant about my job-he asked when they expect me back and I said Monday.  He then signed me off for two weeks 🤣. So my questions are this: can you really tell somebody-who isn’t your employee-that you can’t have an operation as not convenient for them?
can you employ my replacement whilst I’m still employed?
Husband and wife (and it’s always what she wants) so can’t see there is anything I can do!
Can I give my two weeks sick leave as notice instead of a month as they already have my replacement or can I resign with immediate effect?
Thank you and sorry so long. 

Sorry but most of this, although obviously annoying, is irrelevant.

Elective surgery is always a tricky one as it is not the same as an unexpected illness or injury. Arguably, unless you condition is getting rapidly worse without treatment, the surgery should be booked as holiday rather than sick leave. As such your employer needs to approve the proposed date.

If as a consequence of the surgery you are unable to work for X weeks then that time can usually (but not always) be taken as sick leave.

As to who tells you whether the date is OK, obviously that would normally be your employer but if they delegate that job to their spouse that is up to them but it is still the employer's responsibility.

If you are being dismissed, then with over two years service you could potentially claim unfair dismissal. Whether it is worthwhile maybe another matter.

oh_really

For clarity, the wife, is she your employer or not?

Thrugelmir

Undervalued said:

Rasharoon said:

I’m after some advice please as would like to know where I stand with my current employer who I have been with for just over 2 years. I was diagnosed with cartilage damage to my knees and after medical advice was given a date for surgery for knee arthroscopy in August 2021.  On telling my Managers Wife (who I don’t work for but husband and wife share an office with two businesses) was told - in front of an office full of people that I couldn’t have the operation as ‘it wasn’t convenient for her and she was too busy with her own company to sort her husband out’ (it’s just me and him in the office as other employees are field based).  Aside from being humiliated-you could have heard a pin drop-I was speechless but managed to ask when would be convenient to be told October!! When I saw my Manager-he quoted his wife then made light of it as to who wants to self isolate in August.  So I’ve had the Op today.  Since then - dynamics in the office has changed.  Basically-they advertised my job - with me still being employed.  They weren’t going to tell me but I found it on Indeed so I challenged my Manager and said I feel his wife has an issue with me.  He admitted she did but she does with everyone.  I’ve watched how she operates and she really does slag everyone off and refers to some staff as Minions.  Anyway-outside of being mainly my position it would also be working as her PA (which I refused to do as I can’t work for her).  They assumed that after my op - I would be off for weeks but at no point was there a discussion. Once I knew more - I told them I would be off for a few days so when she was setting up my replacement she just said ‘oh god’ and I asked what she meant by that and she said ‘thought you would be off for weeks’. I said that I had no idea where she got that from. She also told my replacement that I was due an op on the other knee in January-news to me. So after today’s op and telling the Consultant about my job-he asked when they expect me back and I said Monday.  He then signed me off for two weeks 🤣. So my questions are this: can you really tell somebody-who isn’t your employee-that you can’t have an operation as not convenient for them?
can you employ my replacement whilst I’m still employed?
Husband and wife (and it’s always what she wants) so can’t see there is anything I can do!
Can I give my two weeks sick leave as notice instead of a month as they already have my replacement or can I resign with immediate effect?
Thank you and sorry so long. 

Sorry but most of this, although obviously annoying, is irrelevant.

Elective surgery is always a tricky one as it is not the same as an unexpected illness or injury. Arguably, unless you condition is getting rapidly worse without treatment, the surgery should be booked as holiday rather than sick leave. As such your employer needs to approve the proposed date.

If as a consequence of the surgery you are unable to work for X weeks then that time can usually (but not always) be taken as sick leave.

As to who tells you whether the date is OK, obviously that would normally be your employer but if they delegate that job to their spouse that is up to them but it is still the employer's responsibility.

If you are being dismissed, then with over two years service you could potentially claim unfair dismissal. Whether it is worthwhile maybe another matter.

Have a chat with ACAS. Sounds as if your relationship is beyond repair. Obtaining the best possible settlement for yourself maybe the route to follow, 

Jillanddy

I lost the plot somewhere.  I'm not even sure where.  But it seems there's a lot of verbal stuff and "supposition". What I read was that they advertised a job.  You might be facing redundancy. If it's mainly your position,  that isn't your position.  It's another position.  You need to stop talking and start putting things in writing.

[Deleted User]

I guess anyone can comment something is inconvenient so don’t let it bother you. I know once I was doing a 9 month fixed term project where having holiday was probably not sensible as it was a sole role in fairness, but well it wasn’t a mentioned pre-requisite at interview. Quite far on and towards the end of the term I had holiday booked and just ploughed through the remarks of do you have to go on leave right now.
Of course came back to a right mess and notice being served, but what the hell the contract had an expiry date at any rate.

Family businesses can be strange. Best just to keep up being courteous. The last place I worked my bosses missus who wasn’t officially involved with the business wouldn’t acknowledge me.  I wasn’t bothered. To her I clearly wasn’t rest of the family working which prob was best outcome. I also came by a company who would rather get rid of you if they knew you wanted holiday.

Of course they can get in as many a replacement as they like, no guarantee they’ll work out so don’t let it knock you.

Get the fullest time recovering - make sure it works for you.
I know someone who is due to have tonsils out and ensuring it will be 5 weeks off when adding leave to the sickness!

When I was last writing a resignation letter, I did see immediate resignation and template help available on the likes of Indeed. But do the best for you and try not to let over emotions rule.

oh_really

Another zoomer.

Dakta

This forum really is a put off for having employees