Reciprocal Enforcement of Maintenance Orders - REMO

JamieR300

Before I start, I am the paying parent and I may get lots of hate mail and stigmatised as 'one of those fathers'.  However, I will start to ask my question and hopefully get some real help regarding my situation.
My ex wife is of Polish origin and we had a daughter, who was born here in the UK.  However, my ex wife decided to leave me and go back to Poland, and begged me to allow her to go with our daughter without any court battles as she didn't want to be stuck in a Country she no longer wanted to live in.  I didn't fight and allowed her to go as long as we kept in touch each week via SKYPE, which of course never transpired.  I know I should have stopped her, but I didn't want her to be trapped in a Country she didn't like, so I let her go.  After around 10 months, I moved out to Poland to be with my ex wife to work there, as I was promised a job that never occurred.  It turned out my time had been wasted and I left a job that was a good one, to be in a Country with a language I couldn't understand or where I couldn't work due to my lack of language skills.  So, I came home.
I was left looking for work here and there, with agency after agency, doing mainly short contracts until I met my recent partner.  My partner had suffered a lot of abuse in a previous relationship and needed a lot of care.  I had to give up work (though it was mainly temporary) and care for her and her 2 children.  We had a child together and we had to claim Personal Independence Payments for my partner and I claimed carers allowance.
This is when it gets a bit hard.  I received a letter from the Courts in the UK (Maintenance Enforcement Business Centre) stating that I must pay £193 per month to my daughter in Poland each month.  I explained that I did not have this money and that I wanted to be given a variation so I could afford the amount (I had been previously paying my ex into her bank but due to the circumstances, I  wasn't able to which I explained why).  I was never given a variation.  I was ordered to pay £193 per month, and I was in receipt of £67 or so each week for carers.  I paid what I could but could never afford that amount.  I am currently in debt by £11,500.  Me and my partner are in receipt of Employment and Support Allowance.  We pay £80 per month but it is still short of £113 per month, and we have 3 children to think about here, in the UK.  It was not my decision to leave, but my wife's and we met in the UK, got married in the UK but I never thought i'd be subject to draconian Polish laws or even their steep payment orders.  All effort has and still is being done to prove (it has not yet been enforced in the UK due to my circumstances) my income and my situation.  Letters from the Mental Health team, letters from my bank, letters from outside support such as Barnardo's (trying to get me back into work).  The Polish courts say they will vary the order or revoke some of the order if I pay 750 PLN into their bank, but the letters are sent to me 5 months over the date I am given to pay.  I have since learned that all my hard work at college may come to nothing as the Professional Diploma I have been seeking can be subject to sanctions, and I may not be able to become a member, and therefore hurting any chance of Employment in the field I have worked so hard to join.
I have cried, and begged for help.  I have asked the Polish courts to be a little more sympathetic to my cause, yet it falls on deaf ears.  I have no car, no house that I own, I don't have a passport anymore as the one I had expired!  I have possibly, at a push assets in TV's, X-boxes (children's) worth possibly £2,000 in my house.  I have no savings,  I have no money, nothing at all to give them.  The amount they requested is £193 x 12 = £2,316 which must mean (at 15%) they think I earn in the region of £15,440 each year.  Even when I worked, I never got anything close to this each year.  £2,316 x 100 / 15 = £15,440 is how I came to this conclusion that they believe I earn that amount.  Even 6 years ago, the minimum wage wasn't £8.57 (based on salary, £15,440 / 12 months / 150 hours = £8.57).  It was based on my potential earnings.  I never, in my life earned close to that amount.
I need help.  I want to pay my ex wife, but an affordable amount until my financial situation improves.  I have studied at college to have my situation improve but even that is now in jeopardy.  
Not all Men are absent Fathers.  Not all Men are bad, and want to shirk their responsibilities.  I just want to pay a reasonable amount until my situation improves and be treated fairly.  In this current climate of all men are abuse enablers etc, I hope the responses I receive are helpful and not judgemental.

[Deleted User]

 Your situation sounds awful. Have you tried CAB or even a solicitor, you might qualify for legal aid being on benefits.
 

JamieR300

I was quoted £160 per hour for a solicitor, and I don't qualify for legal aid.  The Citizens Advice Bureau can't really advise anything apart from pay it.  It seems pointless, but not only am I suffering but so are my step children and children.  It may mean that the 4 years i've spent upskilling, trying to get into a decent paying job could be on the line since any professional status can be removed, and any financial career that I want to embark on now is completely lost.  It seems i've lost everything from any kind of life for my children here in the UK as my livelihood could be taken away, my freedom (Prison) or my assets which I have none.  All because I am unable to pay that amount they have asked each month.  If I could, it would be getting paid, without a doubt.

MovingForwards

Have a look to see if there's any law centres nearby, they are run by qualified solicitors. 

JamieR300

A law centre?  I've not heard of them?
Sorry, but what are they?  Thank you

JamieR300

I've just looked them up.  I'll have a look now.  Thank you.