Having a difficult situation with employment prospects

DaveTheGeordie

I have a situation. I hate the term and don't even like talking about it or identifying with it for a few reasons but it's literally relevant here, so I have this what some will call 'social anxiety'. I don't talk about it IRL or make social media posts about it, or wear it as a badge because it's like attention seeking or you can like filter your worldview through it sort of thing. So it's like recognize I have it and try to accommodate for it on one hand but don't let it run your identity at the same time. I'm NOT a people person anyway. When I was young I lived in the gym. I was obsessed with it. Became a fitness instructor out of high school. Soon realized though that being a fitness instructor / PT is a VERY outgoing job, and I really struggled. I realized about myself what I liked infact was bodybuilding, training, the technical things / stuff part but I sucked at generally interacting with, making friends and dealing with people. So I quit that after a few years. I always took these physically labourious back of house type roles since. Lifting equipment, cleaning, kitchen, shelf stacking. You get the picture.

It's not all bad because first it's like carry your metaphorical cross, hard lines, don't be a victim. And the last job I had I held down for nearly 5 years. So there's certainly a job for me. Only ended because of the covid/lockdown situation. We all were made redundant I mean I wasn't fired as such.

What's thrown a spanner in the works though is I'm getting the early onset arthritis. Currently undergoing diagnosis but I'm 99% it's hereditary psoriasis and rheumatoid types because my mother has those, and I've watched her over the years get these same things that's been going on with me. It hit her at 40. I'm 38. Never had any major health problems. Now all at once I'm getting joints locking up, been flat on my back 3 times in a year from neck problems, getting like welt/lumps in my fingers, organ/chest pains. My feet hurt a lot. Not looking for sympathy it's just like what's the chances, and all at once? So I'm 99% it's that. Went from walking probably 30 miles most days to having a struggle to walk 25 minutes into town.

I really don't know what I'm going to do for work. Thought of office but I don't want to answer phones and talk to people. Like I feel I'm in a catch-22. Interactive job vs physical. I think I'd take the physical and wreck myself before having a mental breakdown. I just want to watch a building at night time or something like that. Crappy job to a lot of people. Would suit me down to the ground. Where are these obscure place watching jobs at? What can I do for work?

welshmoneylover

Have you considered therapy? These phobias can be overcome, hth 

TBagpuss

It sounds as though what you want is a less physical but fairly solitary job.

There are office-based jobs which don't involve a lot of time talking to people - things like data entry or archiving, for instance .

You might also be able to look at less strenuous physical role. there are roles such as attendants at manned car parks, some security roles etc. where there is some interaction with people but you are not expected to be friendly and/or in full 'customer service' mode all the time. 

depending on the extent of the physical issues you might be able to consider whether roles such as supermarket delivery driver might work - there is a physical element but not as demanding as what you've done in the past. 

Can you drive? Might jobs such as HGV driver or forklift driver be options? 

How do you feel about interacting with people in writing rather than by phone? a lot of organizations offer customer service via chat or email rather than phone, so that might be worth looking into. 

Would there be any scope for you to look for roles as a foreman, for people doing similar types of work to what you've done until now? It would involve dealing with people but normally only a relatively small group of people, so again, not a role where you need to be best friends or to be constantly friendly and sociable. 

It would also be worth you looking into whether you could access any form of support or therapy to address the social anxiety. Therapy isn't going to turn you into a bubbly extrovert but might help you to develop ways to manage the anxiety and tools to use in working with other people, which might help you get to a point where you have wider options

route101

Understand this, used to work in a supermarket and now find the prospect of checkouts draining. I avoided it in my last store. I applied for the Royal Mail , gets you out and about!