Been lied too............

Zziggi

Bossyboots wrote:

She does not have to claim the maintenance through the CSA but she does have to declare it for her benefits claim.
.

But who decides whether she is getting the right amount of maintenance if it is not done through the CSA?

Saint_Chris

Thanks for all the messages of support, especially Bossyboots.

You would not believe what happened yesterday tea. After taking the bull by the horn and rining her and explaining our situation with the car allowance. She agreed that we should not pay on this amount as it is for car use. She said no problems we could sort it out ourselves. We will pay her all the arrears in the next week up to date. Then we will pay every 5 weeks on a direct debit in arrears. Which she agreed.

Then lo and behold the CSA rang yesterday aft and said that after much discussion they have decided to back down and we don't have to pay csa on the car allowance. But our new payment would be £44 a week a increase of £2 a week.
I explained that i had contacted his ex-wife and we were going to sort it out privately. he then pointed out the pit falls of this (like hubby stopping paying) now why would he do this when we are happy with the £42 a week and have been asking for giro payment slips for ages.
he said that he would contact his ex-wife and explain to her all this and tell her the new amount. Well i started to panic cause it is a increase of £2 a week = £8 a month. Now this could make a difference.
Next call was the CSA saying that she would have to think about it and will contact the CSA with her decission on Monday.
This got us thinking is she going to change her mind and go thorugh the CSA for the extra £8.
next move hubby rang her direct, and asked her outright had she changed her mind, and why did she not tell the fella from the CSA that she wanted them to cease any involvement. She said that the fella spent ages telling her how this could not work in her favour, we could stop payments, she could not get any money through his employer and we could move and she would not know where we would go.
Basically he did everything to try and keep her on their books. She said that he was bugging her and she was busy cooking tea.
Hubby assured her that he would send cheque, payments would be done on a direct payment through the bank. And he also said 'you should know me when we were married did i ever do anything like this with bills, no i always paid on time'
I knew that she always knew this. When we previously paid csa before him being unempoyed for a few years we always paid weekly and on time. So she knows that.
She also said that she was happy with the £42 and knew that she could get £44 but she could not be bothered waithing for the arrears that we owe to be paid. She will have a cheque of us at the end of next week.

Phew i thought that the csa ringing could have thrown a spanner in the works, but as luck was on our side yesterday it worked in our favour.

I think that the reason that the csa backed down is because i slaughtered them about one of their employees giving us false information, and let us agree weekly payments of £42 and contact the ex and tell her this. The other fella who told us that this was not the case car allowance is taxable.
I slaughterd this employee and stated that she should not be doing that job if she is giving out wrong information. I also went into detail as to how we wanted to take this matter further and report her for giving out the wrong information. And how i was going to contact fathers 4 justice and my mp for advice. As we were misinformed by a employee who does not know their job.the fella told me that his boss would ring the next day.
I think that this was the reason for backing down, as they did not want us to take this road and it could have caused distress for a employee.

So now we are all sorted out and everything is fine.

Just goes to show how things can work out.

Zziggi

If you don't mind me saying, I think you're very lucky to have a responsible & reasonable husband and lucky to have a fairly reasonable husband's ex-wife too!. If only other couples could sort stuff out like this is a reasonable manner, for the benefit of all - especially the children in the middle of it all.

[hope you didn't mind me saying]

Becles

Zziggi wrote:

But who decides whether she is getting the right amount of maintenance if it is not done through the CSA?

There are calculators on the CSA website. When my ex-husband gets his P60, he types in his final salary for the last year (variable as he does a lot of overtime). The calculators work out the monthly payment, which is what he pays me direct into my bank account for the next 12 months.

It works for us, and it's easier than messing around with the CSA.

Xbigman

One thought. I didn't think a parent with custody could write off arrears to the CSA by leaving the CSA and going private. You might still owe the CSA money.
Regards




X