I've really messed up

DizzyDizzy10

I am a member here but with what mess I am in I have switched accounts.

I have been seeing my boyfriend for 11 months and I need to tell him my job. I hear you say "Thats not too bad just do it."

Well, I'm an escort (I pay all tax as a self employed person). When I finished school. I had no GCSEs to talk of, I got on a cooking apprenticeship and whilst I was doing that I needed money, a friend introduced me to escorting  and well I started earning good money. Dropped off my cooking course and been doing this for 10 years. The majority of clients are lovely/nice but I met my current boyfriend on a night out. He just knows I'm a personal assistant. I've fallen for him though and he has fallen for me but not knowing the whole truth. I want to come clean. but I am really scared of telling him in case he dumps me and tells me he never wants to speak to me again. 

I have applied to study at the open university to escape this career, but would need to keep working to pay for it. 

I know my job is my choice, I've tried leaving it so many times but with no formal qualifications employers don't want to know. Even Tesco turned me down!

74jax

DizzyDizzy10 said:

I am a member here but with what mess I am in I have switched accounts.

I have been seeing my boyfriend for 11 months and I need to tell him my job. I hear you say "Thats not too bad just do it."

Well, I'm an escort (I pay all tax as a self employed person). When I finished school. I had no GCSEs to talk of, I got on a cooking apprenticeship and whilst I was doing that I needed money, a friend introduced me to escorting  and well I started earning good money. Dropped off my cooking course and been doing this for 10 years. The majority of clients are lovely/nice but I met my current boyfriend on a night out. He just knows I'm a personal assistant. I've fallen for him though and he has fallen for me but not knowing the whole truth. I want to come clean. but I am really scared of telling him in case he dumps me and tells me he never wants to speak to me again. 

I have applied to study at the open university to escape this career, but would need to keep working to pay for it. 

I know my job is my choice, I've tried leaving it so many times but with no formal qualifications employers don't want to know. Even Tesco turned me down!

Is there a question or are you just wanting to off load your thoughts? 

DizzyDizzy10

74jax said:

DizzyDizzy10 said:

I am a member here but with what mess I am in I have switched accounts.

I have been seeing my boyfriend for 11 months and I need to tell him my job. I hear you say "Thats not too bad just do it."

Well, I'm an escort (I pay all tax as a self employed person). When I finished school. I had no GCSEs to talk of, I got on a cooking apprenticeship and whilst I was doing that I needed money, a friend introduced me to escorting  and well I started earning good money. Dropped off my cooking course and been doing this for 10 years. The majority of clients are lovely/nice but I met my current boyfriend on a night out. He just knows I'm a personal assistant. I've fallen for him though and he has fallen for me but not knowing the whole truth. I want to come clean. but I am really scared of telling him in case he dumps me and tells me he never wants to speak to me again. 

I have applied to study at the open university to escape this career, but would need to keep working to pay for it. 

I know my job is my choice, I've tried leaving it so many times but with no formal qualifications employers don't want to know. Even Tesco turned me down!

Is there a question or are you just wanting to off load your thoughts? 

How do I tell him?

74jax

In conversation I would have thought.  How did you tell you tell him you're a PA?
You could start it with you wanting to change carers and applying at OU.
He's either OK with it, or not. We can't comment on that as we aren't him. 

Emmia

DizzyDizzy10 said:

74jax said:

DizzyDizzy10 said:

I am a member here but with what mess I am in I have switched accounts.

I have been seeing my boyfriend for 11 months and I need to tell him my job. I hear you say "Thats not too bad just do it."

Well, I'm an escort (I pay all tax as a self employed person). When I finished school. I had no GCSEs to talk of, I got on a cooking apprenticeship and whilst I was doing that I needed money, a friend introduced me to escorting  and well I started earning good money. Dropped off my cooking course and been doing this for 10 years. The majority of clients are lovely/nice but I met my current boyfriend on a night out. He just knows I'm a personal assistant. I've fallen for him though and he has fallen for me but not knowing the whole truth. I want to come clean. but I am really scared of telling him in case he dumps me and tells me he never wants to speak to me again. 

I have applied to study at the open university to escape this career, but would need to keep working to pay for it. 

I know my job is my choice, I've tried leaving it so many times but with no formal qualifications employers don't want to know. Even Tesco turned me down!

Is there a question or are you just wanting to off load your thoughts? 

How do I tell him?

You just sit him down and tell him, being as honest as you can be as it's probably going to be a bit of a shock for him.

Are you prepared for the possibility he'll end it though when you come clean?

AskAsk

too late i think.  he will leave as this is too much for any ordinary person to take onboard.

DizzyDizzy10

Emmia said:

DizzyDizzy10 said:

74jax said:

DizzyDizzy10 said:

I am a member here but with what mess I am in I have switched accounts.

I have been seeing my boyfriend for 11 months and I need to tell him my job. I hear you say "Thats not too bad just do it."

Well, I'm an escort (I pay all tax as a self employed person). When I finished school. I had no GCSEs to talk of, I got on a cooking apprenticeship and whilst I was doing that I needed money, a friend introduced me to escorting  and well I started earning good money. Dropped off my cooking course and been doing this for 10 years. The majority of clients are lovely/nice but I met my current boyfriend on a night out. He just knows I'm a personal assistant. I've fallen for him though and he has fallen for me but not knowing the whole truth. I want to come clean. but I am really scared of telling him in case he dumps me and tells me he never wants to speak to me again. 

I have applied to study at the open university to escape this career, but would need to keep working to pay for it. 

I know my job is my choice, I've tried leaving it so many times but with no formal qualifications employers don't want to know. Even Tesco turned me down!

Is there a question or are you just wanting to off load your thoughts? 

How do I tell him?

You just sit him down and tell him, being as honest as you can be as it's probably going to be a bit of a shock for him.

Are you prepared for the possibility he'll end it though when you come clean?

I am, I would be broken but I would understand why

strawb_shortcake

How did you explain your working situation over lockdown? Presumably this was a sector hit by the virus and you weren't working or had any income for much of the time you and your partner have been together.

DizzyDizzy10

annabanana82 said:

How did you explain your working situation over lockdown? Presumably this was a sector hit by the virus and you weren't working or had any income for much of the time you and your partner have been together.

We don't live together and I have some savings put by for when I can't work. 

tacpot12

I would suggest that you explain that you are telling him now because you have only just been able to pluck up the courage to tell him, but you want him to know the truth because of how much he means to you. 

I do hope that he loves you enough to understand that it is not easy to share the truth about such things. 

Marvel1

I think he will find it difficult, it will be all the things involved running through his mind.