Diary of a reformed shopaholic (I hope)

Drawingaline

Well done on saying no! It's hard. But gets easier. How old is he? I try not to use we can't afford it, but 'it's not in the budget this week'. Sounds better and can prompt discussions about budgeting and finances. My oldest two thought we were really poor at one point, I had to point out we had a house, food, heat etc and not hvin  money set aside for something or me having to work overtime didn't mean we were about to starve, more that we were meeting our obligations and using excess to save for a holiday or day out. 

shoppingobsessed2020

Thanks @Drawingaline monkey boy is 8 so old enough to know when I say no it’s for a reason and not just because I’m being mean.  I can’t eat most takeaways so I did explain to him that with all this lockdown that as I’ve been off work poorly I don’t have the money for lots of treats and luxuries and it’s not fair for him to be sat eating Chinese when I still have to cook something for me anyway.  He wasn’t fussed and thought i should still buy it for him as we’ve not had anything nice this week!  I beg to differ, I’ve made him and the neighbours banana bread, caramel shortbread and chocolate muffins this week (new agreement with a neighbour, I keep her supplied in cakes and she will keep me supplied in eggs as she has chickens) We are bound to have hiccups with us both but it really is hitting home how wasteful we’ve been as a few weeks ago I’d have got him that Chinese and binned most of it as he wouldn’t eat it all.  Plus I’d much rather the hiccup be a £5 Macdonalds for him than a £30 takeaway for one person.  I can handle £5 hiccup in the budget, I can’t handle a £30 hiccup.

enthusiasticsaver

Well done on starting to tackle the debt and good luck with the budgeting.  It will not do your son any harm at all for you to say no to him occasionally.  A £30 for a takeaway sounds loads.  We paid £20 for a chinese for 3 of us the other day.  As they always give us loads though we share dishes. 

Drawingaline

Sounds like there will be some tough conversations with you son going forward! But he is young enough to adapt and forget, wait until he is a teen then the entitlement really kicks in 😂

My 8yr old has just received some money for his birthday and I have added it to my budget (I use ynab so have a line for his money) he is excited to see this and will enjoy spending it on things he wants. Maybe something to think about with your son when life becomes a little more normal again. Set an amount aside for takeaways or little treats. A bit a month (like £20 or so) and he can decide if he wants to blow it on one Chinese, or a McDonald's every week. Giving him a sense of choice in a tight budget may help going forward. 

shoppingobsessed2020

Thanks monkey boy gets pocket money so I’ll suggest him using his money in future.  Might hit home that he gets no spends for a while if he wants to blow it on a takeaway.  He gets £2.50 a week but has to do certain jobs, nothing extreme but we all live here so we all have to help keep it clean and tidy.  He has an app that keeps track of his money and every couple of months I take money out the app and transfer it to his bank account if he’s not spent anything (this is included in child spending on budget).  We started pocket money maybe 3
years ago as I got fed up of a £5 magazine everytime we went to the shop.  He soon stopped asking when he had to spend his money.  He generally is a saver but that’s probably because I’ve been rather generous with visits to the toy shop when his dad is home and things.  Good school report ok let’s go to the toy shop.  Awwww your poorly and off school let’s get you a new game to keep you occupied etc.  That has stopped.

well today was a no spend day and we did rather well today.  Film afternoon on the sofa with homemade popcorn and “hot dogs” on the sofa for tea.  

I have got a grocery shop planned for Friday morning.  It’s approx £40 at the moment as I’ve put a couple bottles of gin in it to keep the slot.  I will go and amend the shop on Thursday after meal planning and do a proper shop based on what we need.  If we don’t need much and I can make do with what we have I’ll cancel the slot.  

I’ve another week signed off work so need to try get back into a routine this week as I’m feeling so much better and with it.  Not had a nap today so that’s progress!

  My plans for this month are as follows

 cancel home insurance renewal - got it cheaper and with cash back so win win

keep checking for when can change mortgage deal.  Potential saving of £80-£100 a month.

try and cut the grass.  Every summer I have a gardener come and do the garden.  It’s £50 a month for 2 cuts so I’m going to attempt it myself.  If I can’t manage, it may be necessary to put this in my budget but I’ll give it a go.

im also going to paint the front garden fence, well when my paint brushes are delivered!  I did order them a few weeks ago pre budget along with the paint.  The paint got delivered but I’m waiting on the brushes.  This is huge as we get a handyman to do all our diy and decorating as we are both terrible at it.  

Both cars need valeting so I’m going to attempt it myself.  The only thing I draw the line at is washing them myself so when lockdown is over I’ll chuck them through a car wash.  That’s a saving of £50 per car less what £10 for a couple of car washes and I would get them done every 3/4 months.

tidy and clean the garage/man cave.  I didn’t get round to this as planned this week.  I think we need another storage unit to keep the garden cushions on/in Will see what I can find towards the end of the month.  It’s become a bit of a dumping ground as it’s out of site but I want to start back using the treadmill but the mess of it will drive me insane.

tidy and make room in the study so me and monkey boy can work together.  Me working from home and him doing his school work.  I may need to buy printer ink, this i need to check.  

so on track this week.  Meal plan is done for the week ahead, ironing is done.  Monkey boy has his timetable set to start his school work (he’s done bits but I felt mean making him work when I haven’t been working).

It’s been a rollercoaster of a week.  Some big changes to be made, some small ones already in motion.  Just need to keep plodding along.  I am slightly annoyed though and it’s minor.  My dd for the capital one card is coming out(didn’t think it would as I made a manual payment) but it’s going to make the balance an odd number!  I wanted it a nice round number so it’s bugging me now I’m focusing my attention on this card.  Must remember in future to make overpayments once the direct debit had come out to avoid this going forward.

Drawingaline

Yes Overpayment need to be timed with direct debit payments. 

All sounds positive. I use a handyman for various bits, but can paint, put up shelves/curtain tracks etc myself. I know my limits. And having a decent arsenal of tradespeople is very important. If I could justify it I would pay a gardener regularly. I tend to get one off tidies out the front once a year, but do cut the grass myself. I was in talks about getting my handyman to dig out another bed in tqq front but am getting the impression he isn't too keen so may bite the bullet and do it myself. I have the time and can do it, I just dislike it. 

savingholmes

Sounds like using your son's budgeting app is the way to go. Well done for cutting back on all the treats. That was one of my big traps in the past - still a work in progress in some areas.

shoppingobsessed2020

Today was so very nearly a no spend day. Forgot about amazon subscribe and save for cat food so that landed on my door today.  Annoyingly I went to suspend it the other day but I suspended next month rather than this. never mind, we had a bit of spare of unallocated cash this month so has gone on that.

ive been reading a few diaries this evening and ynab keeps coming up.  Is it really that good and worth paying for or am I better of sticking with my excel spreadsheet and named saving account pots (I’ve got them named car, house, presents etc so I know when looking online which is which.)

monkey boy has been better today.  We had a talk re luxuries and he seems to understand that we are very fortunate to have what we have and if he wants daddy home more we need to cut some of the treats and find different ones going forward.  He seemed onboard with that and I’ve amended the meal plan so he can choose 2 meals a week.  

Monday is always taco night when not on lockdown.  We have cubs so I need a quick tea for him otherwise we stop by the chip shop on the way home which is not the way going forward.  Friday and Saturday nights he now gets to choose what we have as long as I know in advance so I can get ingredients.  This Weekend he wants takeaway southern fried chicken but is happy with home style.  No idea how to do this one so most likely going to buy breaded/coated chicken and whack it in the oven.  He also wants home made pizza as he liked my pizza better than the takeaway, this I can manage easily.

weve had a lazy day today.  Monkey boy needed that contact so we’ve spent most of the day snuggling on the sofa and watching films/box sets.  I’m a strict parent in some ways yet when it comes to watching tv I’m not overly fussed on age ratings.  Today we continued the Big Bang theory.  I wish we hadn’t started this one to be honest as there’s a lot of references to grown up activities that I defo don’t remember being in the later series which he’s seen, so far though it’s gone over his head but we are gearing up for the “talk” as he is starting to develop teenage smells and habits so this may bring it on sooner rather than later.

Hopefully no more spending till planned grocery/Costco shop later this week.

Drawingaline

Well you know my views on ynab, as I stated on my diary 😉😊 but other people do well with spreadsheets and other things. Spreadsheets hurt my head, I am having to use them in my newer job and tbh I don't like them. Hubby on the other hand adores them 😂

We are similar with TV, and some video games. There are some that are an out and out no, but we are happy to watch 18 films with the 14&16 Yr old, depending on why it is an 18. We watched True Romance with them, quite a bit of naughty in that, and violence, but a good story. We did die hard, but did forward over the close up head shooting bit. We are led by them really, I have been watching some 80's and 90's classics with them, and tbh there is much worse around now. I am funny with live theatre guidelines though. I wouldn't take my teen son to see American Idiot. He can be very sensitive and I find live theatre so much more moving than a TV screen 🤷‍♀️

joedenise

I use the old version of YNAB.  I'm quite happy with that but I wouldn't want to use the newer one which has to be paid for monthly or annually.  If your spreadsheets and savings accounts work for you I'd stick with it.  It's what I'll do if my YNAB gives up the ghost!

The BBC Good Food Website has a southern fried chicken recipe which will be healthier and probably cheaper than buying breaded chicken.  I've not tried that recipe myself but I'm sure it would be good.  

However I do make a Slimming World version using the recipe on the Slimmingeats website.  Just search for Fakeaway KFC on the website.