Separation and transfer of equity – without a Deed of Trust – trying to avoid court!

annienui

We are in an odd situation – my ex boyfriend is looking to buy me out of a property which we bought for £300,000 (he paid a £20k deposit, I paid £10k). We don't have a Deed of Trust in place, but I'm not trying to get 50/50 split (which I'm told I would get, without a Deed in place.) He has drafted up a Deed with his solicitors which would simply get me back my deposit and my mortgage repayments, but I would lose the equity – which at the moment is almost £200,000.

We have a child who stays with me at a rented flat (my ex stayed at the flat we own, because he wasn't in a very good mental state to rent a room anywhere). I feared he would harm himself if I tried to take the flat as well as leaving him. However, things have changed and I am no longer afraid he wouldn't cope – so I am willing to look at all of my options, fairly and justly. 

I found advice on https://www.moneyadviceservice.org.uk/en/articles/dividing-the-family-home-and-mortgage-during-separation# which stated that we could:
"Transfer part of the value of the property from one partner to the other so that your children have somewhere to live. The partner who gave up a share of their ownership rights would keep a stake or ‘interest’ in the home. This means that when it is sold he or she will receive a percentage of its value." The site didn't offer much more insight on this.

I have since married (we were separated 3 years) and had another child. I have tried to tell him that I can't just let go of the equity, the deposit and repayments are not enough for me to secure another loan on a house. I want to separate from the lease with him, but I want to retain equity in the flat, if he manages to buy me out. How can I do this? 

Any other advice (before I hire a solicitor) is very much appreciated!
  

Thrugelmir

Rather late to have a Deed drawn up. To be in anyway effective a Court would have expected you to have received independent legal advice. (As matters stand you are effectively being railroaded even if you were to sign it). 
Sit tight and do nothing at the current time. Your ex's solicitors will hopefully talk sense into him. As to remove you he either needs to make an acceptable offer or take the matter to court. Court's are both expensive and shouldn't be viewed as somewhere to go to arbitrate so unlikely course of action by your ex. 
Appreciate this doesn't move matters forward. Sometimes time is the most effective course of action. Longer term be prepared to take a legal course of action yourself. The threat may focus your ex's attention. 

annienui

Thank you for your stern advice..! To clarify, I've agreed that he can buy me out, but I wouldn't want my savings to be locked in the property in these uncertain times for very long – so I feel like I can't sit tight even if I wanted to.

Our first hurdle is to agree on the exact instructions for the solicitors, because my ex is not seeing my point of view about the equity. If I could show him another case or give him some proof that others have gone ahead with this approach, ie. one person retaining equity in the flat, then he might see sense. I'm struggling to find another case. 

Thrugelmir

Apologies if I came across as stern 
There's no legal precedents to follow unfortunately. All one can do is to stand ones ground, be pragmatic and reasonable.  You should consult your own solicitor if need be. If only to put your own proposal across in a formal manner to his solicitors. 
Is there a fundamental issue in that your ex cannot afford to buy you out? 

annienui

I like stern advice! I think people should give more of it. 
OK – it makes sense, not many draft a Deed up this late in the process. He seems to think that it will protect his deposit – very interesting about the 'railroading' point.. Often it feels like he uses the Deed of Trust as a tool to negotiate other matters, "if we get the deed of trust done first, then we can go ahead with getting your monies.." Hmm. 
He says he can afford to buy me out in his terms, which is paying back my deposit and my mortgage repayments up until I moved out of the property (two years ago). I don't think he can remortgage just to raise my equity as well.  I would be OK if I was paid the equity at the point of sale (probably in 5-7 years time).