Dreading OR Interview tomorrow

Samirish

Hi, so here goes my first post, sorry if its a little lengthy...i went BR last Weds (12.2.20) and, until today, the only correspondence I've had have been copies of the bank letters and a letter saying I can keep my car. 
Today I received a phone call (I was driving so didn't answer), this was followed up with a very abrupt email stating that if he (the OR) is unable to contact me when needed then he cannot deal with my Bankruptcy!  He went on to say that It is my responsibility to contact him as a priority, and failure to do so can be treated as non-co-operation which can result in my public examination at court and/or suspension of my discharge from bankruptcy!  I WAS DRIVING FOR CHRIST'S SAKE! 
He then told me that my interview will be held sometime between 9 and 12 tomorrow and I must be available (even if I have to take time off of work!).  I've told them at work that something has come up with my kids tomorrow and I need time off (I don't want them to know the truth) but I'm now dreading the interview as the OR has come across as very unsympathetic and quite confrontational.
Anyone else had this happen? 
Sam x

cymruchris

I wouldn't worry too much - once you get chatting with them, and demonstrate your co-operation, they'll be as nice as pie. They have a job to do of course, but that job isn't to make you feel bad. My interview lasted just over an hour of discussion, and after that we exchanged a few emails, but then had no further contact from the OR until discharge. Don't get yourself all worked up - it's likely they're used to people ignoring them, and giving the short, shrift message delivers the importance of the situation at hand. It may also partly be the way you've interpreted it - which is very much understandable based on what you're going through - as I say - don't get too worked up, tell them all they need to know, or agree that you'll get whatever they need, and it'll be over in no time. 

thevdm

The email is likely a mail merge job designed for anyone who misses the call to get them to call back. Was the call yesterday booked in to be the interview, or them calling to book the appointment?

Chances are you will find that the OR will be friendly over the phone and show some understanding. For me the interview lasted about 30-45 minutes and although it was fully down to business she didn't make me feel uncomfortable. If he does make you feel uncomfortable, co-operate as much as you can and it will likely be the last time you hear from the OR.

TimeToRebuild

yeah don't worry, it is a standard email that gets sent when you miss the call, my OR was lovely once we got on the phone, aslong as you have been honest you have nothing to fear.

Samirish

Just had my interview and I think I managed to get the one and only horrible OR!!  I'm usually a calm and confident person but I have come off the phone feeling guilty and awful!  He questioned everything and had a tone in his voice which came across as bored and unconvinced.  I had stated that my marriage breakdown in 2007 was the catalyst for the years of debt that followed, he said "well that was some 13 years ago so can't be blamed for your position now" I didn't expect sympathy and empathy, but a little understanding of the fact I have worked and bought my kids up alone would have been nice.  He finished by saying that if my circumstances change to let the contact at the office know as he will ignore anything I send...goodbye.
I haven't cried in years and years...right now I feel like bawling my eyes out! 

Samirish

My heart is still pounding where I'm so angry/upset.  There are questions I wanted to ask that I didn't as I just wanted to get off the phone. 
He didn't mention anything about my SOA nothing about payments to be made.  Don't really want to ring them so guess I will just sit and wait. 

KEHxxx

I'm really sorry to hear about your bad experience, I am still to go through it myself and am worrying so much! At least it is over now. Maybe some of your questions could be answered on here or maybe call the office as sounds like you might be able to deal with another person rather than the OR? Don't let it get to you though as you are through the hard part now.

Samirish

Sorry, I don't mean to worry others who have not yet had their interview, the last thing I would want to do is to cause unnecessary stress.  Just wanted to let off some steam to those who understand.  I'm glad it's over but don't feel the enormous wave of relief that I was expecting.  Perhaps that will come with time. 

RattyIrk

You will get a financial questionnaire in the next month or two.  That and any follow up questions may be extent of your dealings with OR and that could well be all done by email.  You have just been unlucky.  
My interview was face to face which I personally prefer for something like this.  Was just a guy doing his job and pretty painless interaction since.
I found the first couple of months was a bit of a shock and an adjustment.  Going bankrupt is a big thing and should not be underestimated how it affects you whether you are aware of it or not.  I never got a wave of relief but it did gradually happen.  Bankruptcy puts a stop on creditors and the threat of court proceedings, people turning up on your doorstep etc.  Only had one creditor contact me, sent them a copy of the bankruptcy order by email and that was it.  It also gives you the start of a plan going forwards and going forwards without crippling debt.  None of us wanted to end up in this situation but sometimes things happen.  You have done the right thing.  

thevdm

I'm sorry to hear that you had a bad experience with the OR, I feel a bit bad for saying not to worry as they're quite nice. He sounds like a bit of a jerk. After my parents split up it took my mum a long time to get over the trauma of everything that had happened, although she has never had financial issues it is very clear to me that she struggled in other ways (this was many many years ago, she's fine now). Saying that 13 years ago is too far in the past is something clearly said by somebody who has had an uneventful life.

Add anything you're unsure about on this forum and you will likely get a good answer, if it's something that the OR office would have to deal with then people will let you know.

In my case the paperwork arrived a few days after the call, hopefully it is quick for you too so you can put this behind you and get on with a new life. The serenity and relief will follow shortly, you'll get there.

Samirish

Thank you all for your replies, I shall sit tight and wait for the post. 
As for Bank accounts, I have 2, 1 with Nationwide and 1 with Barclays, both are pretty basic accounts with no overdrafts.  They were sent letters informing them of my BR last week, I cleared the accounts of the (little) money I had in them in readiness for them being frozen...this has yet to happen.  How long should I leave it before I start using them again?  Will I def receive correspondence from them?