No Plan B

GlitteringGold

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MovingForwards

First step is recognising you can't carry on, which is the hardest part.

I highly recommend you complete a full statement of affairs, even if it's just for your own benefit. You can then see what bills are costing the most, where you are spending, where you are spending for spending sake.

Usually food, that's the easiest one to cut down on, swap for cheaper brands, bulk food out with veg and lentils etc. Take your lunch to work, if you don't already.

I highly recommend the vegetarian student nosh cookbook, it's under £2 on eBay and is full of quick, cheap food, it overs starters / mains and puddings as well as giving shopping lists

The next big payment things tend to be mobile phone, internet and gym.

As the weather gets better, you can go to the park and have picnic, not sure where you are but there are bound to be several free things you can do.

Car bills are a pain, rarely are they cheap, you need to start saving for those.

Good luck, it will all be worth it

GlitteringGold

Thanks MovingForwards. I’ve already got most spending down quite low - the problem for me is resisting big blow outs when I feel miserable - £500 holiday sounds like a bargain but throw in costs of fuel to get there, new clothes etc etc and it’s another £1000 I couldn’t really afford. New phones from Very, telling myself I’d pay them off monthly like a contract and then continuing to spend that money on other stuff.

I’m going to review our food shop. It’s £100 a week for 7 people but I think I can trim a bit more off that.

Then learning to sit with my emotions instead of trying to spend my way out of misery (thus creating more delayed misery).

MovingForwards

It is difficult with emotional spending, as it does make you feel better, until it's time to pay it the following month

What's the age range of the five or six children? Any dietary requirements or fussy eaters?

QueenJess

How about thinking of some ideas of things to do which could make you feel good but don't cost very much/are free (i.e. not involving just buying stuff and more experiences)? You could also budget yourself a small amount each month to put in a separate "pot" for the times you just need to buy yourself something to make yourself feel better (I've seen that on other diaries).

GlitteringGold

That’s a good idea QueenJess.

MovingForwards - baby to mid teens. Only the baby in nappies. Preschooler is a bit of a fussier eater but that doesn’t make my food shop more expensive.

I’ve started writing a list of all the things I want to buy but haven’t. It’s good to see it getting longer - feels like I’ve achieved something just by keeping my cards in my purse!